Am I wrong?

Question

I am 18 years old and in college. I live at home and I am close to my family. My mother hates the idea that I have had sex. And practically despises me for it. Is that alright? My boyfriend and I have been going out for little over a year and we are very close. He lives near me at home, but goes to college in a different state. They let me go visit him last month and won't let me go again. They say there is no reason for me to go and that I do not need an explination. I know I still live at home, but aren't these two decisions ones I can make on my own? Please answer me because I am very confused and don't know what to do.

Answer 1

parent's house, parent's rules.
your house, your rules.
Teenagers having sex out of wedlock is nothing to be proud of.

Answer 2

The fact that you had sex with your boyfriend of 1 yr at 18 isn't that bad if you used a condom. The condom part is very important even if you are on the pill, especially since he is in college in a different state. He more than likely, at some point, will have sex with other girls at school since he is so far from you. At 18 some people are mature enough to make the decision to have sex. Please protect yourself against pregnancy and STD's. You wouldn't want to get pregnant and complicate things at school. It's hard enough to be in college without other things to worry about. I think it's great that you have the kind of relationship with your parents where you feel comfortable enough to tell them that you have had sex, but there really is no reason to tell your family every time that you have sex with your boyfriend( although they will probably think you are every time that you go out with him).

I really see no need for you to go to visit him there. At 18 and just starting college you need to concentrate on your school work. I know you think that you love him and that you may lose him if you don't see him on a regular basis. If the 2 of you really love each other then it will all work out just seeing each other during school breaks.

Answer 3

Well, as long as you live under your parents' roof, you have to live by their rules. That's how it works.
That said, no, I don't think it's right that your mother is making judgements on you. Of course, if that is against her values, then you have a disagreement.
My advice to you is that if your parents are being so strict with you, and you are now an adult, you are going to have to set out on your own, get a job, support yourself, and then you can make your own decisions about other aspects of your life.
It sucks, but that's your best bet. They may still never accept your lifestyle, but you will control what they can or can't say or do to influence it.

Answer 4

That is hard to answer. In my opinion, I think you should be able to do what you want. After all you are 18, but you do live under their roof. Cant you move out and move to the college? That would be better. To live on the campus rather than live with your parents. Then you can do what you want. Just make sure you endure safe sex. Good luck to you and do well in college.

Answer 5

That's right parents house parents rule. So what if you are 18 they still pay your rent or whatever you need to respect their decisions. Outside of their house you can do whatever but not in their house. You want to travel then you need to have your own place so they cant stop you. Even if you have your own place your parents will always tell you what to do or try to stop you but only because they still think they have power over you and because no matter how old you are for them you are still their baby. So think about it.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

Well....no its not alright that she despises you for having sex because its your life and you're 18 now. You can do what you want. As for the going to see your boyfriend...if i was your mom i wouldnt let you go wither. Especially if i was paying for it...but if YOU'RE paying for it its totally different. In that case you should go. But if you're not then i dont think you have a right to be mad at them for not letting you go. I mean your mom is mad that you had sex with him so why would she willingly let you go see him and risk you having sex with him again...think about it

Answer 8

you are 18 which means you can make your own decisions.... if you have the money to go see your man go... if not and your parents had to pay your way then you know the answer..... you are legally grown so you can make this decision on your own... good luck

Answer 9

this is a tough one. your an adult. but you live at home. who pays for you? the only way out of this one, get a place of your own. support yourself. pay your way through college. otherwise. listen to mom

Answer 10

ok woman u are 18 years old that means u are an ADULT u can do whatever u want its time u start making ur own choices thats not fair of ur parents at all and they should be ashamed of themselves!!!!!!!

Answer 11

It seems like your parents can't let go. It looks like you need to find a new roof under your head.