2007-03-21 11:40:54 · 12 answers · asked by lilypod 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
In many cases, the woman tells him her feelings in a way that blames him for the negative feelings she might have. Many times, women present their feelings as though the man is at fault: unhappy, tired, unappreciated, unloved.
Most normal men don't feel persecuted when women show (rather than tell) feelings of appreciation, love, admiration, respect.
2007-03-21 11:45:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
OK I don't want to upset you or anyone else but I think its mostly that husbands(males) usually don't communicate their feelings(until they reach a point)
Women on the other hand will communicate those feelings as casually as breathing on a regular basis
that being said men are fixers we naturally hear about an "emotional situation" and go into Mr. fix it mode even when we cant do anything about it
women are creators, the have a unique and natural ability to create things out of nothing,
Even when its unintentional they create"emotional situations" that men cant fix or understand they don't need to fix and there in lies the problem" We don't understand"
I don't know how to solve this problem (hey, I am a man, I'm not sure I'm supposed to know)or what you can do besides love that person because they are your spouse and keep trying to get them to understand that you either feel like they are pointing the proverbial finger at you or you do not intend to make them feel persecuted
hope this helped :)
2007-03-21 12:17:08 · answer #2 · answered by blackplatnium007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not many people - men or women - do a good job bottling it all up then letting it out bit by bit with grace and diplomacy.
Women do things for their men, knuckle under, then suddenly "share their feelings" by throwing a toaster and a knife at their guy, then wonder why they react to being screamed at for 3 hours and called names sailors don't know.
Try this: alert him to things earlier - stop waiting and getting a martyr complex and bottling it all up and then exploding - when it's bad say this is bad and I am working on how to say it - tell him ONE THING then shut up and LISTEN for a refreshing change - before ending, review the good things and make a to-do list for him AND FOR YOU so you can see progress.
2007-03-21 12:52:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could it be that some men does not know how to show their emotion and if the wife say how she feels , it will make them feel hopeless and a failure??
2007-03-21 11:49:59 · answer #4 · answered by islandgirl06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you mean telling him your feelings as in telling him things that bother you about HIM, it's because men are more fragile than they let on, and don't like to feel nagged or browbeaten or forced to change. More important to men than love almost is respect. If he feels you're too critical, he may wonder if you like him *at all*. If you did, you wouldn't want to change so much about him. And men like their comfort zones. Asking them to do more or differently is asking them to move outside of their comfort zone. They don't like it. They like to find a balance and stay there. Except in the bedroom. :-)
If you mean that you want him to listen while you tell him about *your* feelings or problems, it's because men are action people, but they need to know *exactly* what action you want them to take in response to your "sharing". Do you just want him to sit there and listen with his arm around you? Tell him exactly that. Do you want him to give you advice? Tell him that. Do you want him to have a heart to heart relating session with you? That's what your girlfriends are for.
2007-03-21 11:58:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men do not normally share their feelings with each other. We share information or problems with each other. When problems are shared, we propose solutions.
When people we love dearly, who we feel responsible for their happiness, tell us that they aren't happy, we feel responsible, and upset that we can't 'fix' the problem. We have failed, in our minds.
2007-03-21 16:10:00 · answer #6 · answered by kheserthorpe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men act like they don't care and truly they do. I guess you can say IT'S A MAN THING.
2007-03-21 11:45:07 · answer #7 · answered by married92 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well I think that it depends on how you tell them your feelings. My hubby is ok with it most of the time as long as I am not attacking him.
2007-03-21 11:43:42 · answer #8 · answered by The Voice Of Reason 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how you approach them. ex: I'm tired of you doing .... You make me sick when you ..... Why can't you just....... You just don't get it do you....... All you ever do is sit on your........ When are you going to finally wake up and.......
You always have to......
Those are examples of why they might feel attacked.
2007-03-21 11:46:26 · answer #9 · answered by sweet 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Feelings make their balls fall off.
2007-03-21 11:45:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋