Well, imagine mariage, where husband already used to lie. I know this, but I want to be with this man. So, how to stop be jealouse, how to close my eyes on everything. Becourse my jealousy is only one detail, which is crazy breaking our relationship.
2007-03-21 11:26:13 · 10 answers · asked by Charlebois S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh dear, you have a huge self esteem issue.....why would you want to close your eyes to the truth? How could you anyway? You have a brain, you know the truth, so closing your eyes isnt going to take away memories....it is not going to take away the thought that your husband is a liar. You will never be able to trust him again and you will go mad if you close your eyes and ignore your own happiness. Maybe instead of closing your eyes, open them real wide and see the truth in the light of day. If you love this man, then closing your eyes is not going to solve the problem. Love is a two way street and if it is one sided then you are cheating yourself and are nothing more than a door matt that your husband can wipe his feet on....You would be no more than a puppet who reacts to the strings he pulls, when he pulls them.
The only way to approach this thing, is to open your eyes and see there is a huge problem in your marriage. If your husband loves you and wants to stay married to you then maybe its time you stopped sweeping your problems under the carpet and start to deal with them. Tell your husband that its time you got your lives in order and it is because you love him very much that you think its time you got some marriage guidance counselling. He probably wont be open to it because he has the perfect wife.....he can do and say anything he likes and there are no consequences for his actions. You are giving him a free reign to treat you any way he likes. How can you do that to yourself?
Do both of you a favour and get into counselling before its too late.....If your husband is sincere and his lies are in his past and he has turned over a new leaf, then the only way you are going to get over your jealousy and insecurities is to see a counsellor. So much damage has been done by his lies and probably his infedility and it needs to be dealt with once and for all.
Youre not dealing and you need some help...both of you need some professional intervention if your marriage is to survive.
That is the best advice I can give you, and probably advice you should seriously consider.
Take care, if you want a strong marriage then take my advice because if you continue to close your eyes to everything then it will end up destroying you.
Take care and be strong...confront your problems head on....there is a solution to everything.
2007-03-21 11:40:27 · answer #1 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Totally feel your pain. Trust will come only when he does stop lying and has proven him self of the ability to be honest, faithful and sincere. If you close your eyes and turn away, even contain your jealousy it will only be temporary before you explode. I understand wanting to be with him to a degree, but the fact of the matter is he needs to understand and especially you that there is someone out in this world willing to love you and be honest and you don't have to work for the trust. He needs to mend his ways or you need to cut the string. I.E. Take back your heart hold it close to yourself, until he proves himself worth being the one to hold your heart again.
2007-03-21 11:32:38 · answer #2 · answered by 20+ years and still in-love! 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
........you can't trust again... you have to love and let go... he has an issue and he is gonna have to deal with the changes of life... you should not spend the majority of the relationship forgiving him..... A man is suppose to compliment you not take away.... he is robbing you of your happiness because when you catch him in a lie you feel like crap and think it's because you did something wrong..... Us woman have to learn to stop blaming our selves for men mistakes....it's not our fault.... they are just dogs
2007-03-21 11:39:29 · answer #3 · answered by Shonda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait. You are willing to stay with a man who lies and you are asking how to close your eyes to it all??
I don't think you'll get any answers to that question here. The majority of responses will be "dump him". I have to agree with that.
2007-03-21 11:29:50 · answer #4 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say move on i you can. If this guy lies too much , you will never be able to trust him. And its unhealthy for any kind of relationship, when someone cant trust someone.
2007-03-21 11:35:30 · answer #5 · answered by =P 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust is a deal breaker...I don't believe that you should be closing your eyes and trying to deal with his lies. You need to value yourself more.....you deserve to be with someone who is honest - not some two timing liar.
2007-03-21 11:36:54 · answer #6 · answered by Clarissa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to miserable there are several other ways of going about it that wont ultimatly leave you empty of with a STD.
2007-03-21 11:33:59 · answer #7 · answered by D B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would think his lying is what is the cause of your relationship breaking up, how do you think you can trust him or stop being jealous if he disrespects you like this.
2007-03-21 11:32:57 · answer #8 · answered by darlin12009 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't be with someone who lies. You will never be happy.
2007-03-21 11:35:28 · answer #9 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it, it is a waste of time. Move on.
2007-03-21 11:29:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋