Don't people realize whatever becomes of their marriage is a result of something they did or didn't do. We manifest our own reality in our lives...even in our relationships. Too often people always want to blame the other spouse. Do you agree?
2007-03-21 09:11:18 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes I do, people love to be the "victim", it is a cop out. People get married for all of the wrong reasons, and then act surprised when it sucks. Go figure.
2007-03-21 09:15:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Totally agree. Why accept the blame when you can blame someone else. If a person accepted the responsibility, they would not be perfect anymore. And you know you can only have one perfect person in a relationship, that is usually the one that does the blaming and doesn't apologize, and in some cases is the real problem.
2007-03-21 16:27:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I completely agree. I know my faults in my relationship and I'm willing to admit them and try and work on them. People all too often totally blame their partner for everything that went wrong, do they do the same when everything goes right? Not generally. There are some definite flaws in my partner as well, but we are very open to admitting them and at least right now, I am open to fixing them. I wish more people would own up to things.
2007-03-21 16:17:22 · answer #3 · answered by Heather L 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes. It all began with Adam and Eve - Eve blamed the serpent - Adam blamed Eve and God. And that is how it all began.
We are never to blame - it's ALWAYS someone else's fault - why do you think lawyers are getting so rich? Because people have gigantic egos and think they are owed something and being humble and taking responsibility for our actions have become a thing of the past.
2007-03-21 16:15:40 · answer #4 · answered by Stefka 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree but most people are like this because in a way their still just like a teenager. They think that they can get away with whatever and still have someone else to keep an eye out on them, cook for them, and give them a roof over their head. Obviously this is not. Just set some boundraries tell him/her whats what and if they dont like it than bye bye
Good Luck
2007-03-21 16:15:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
People don't have to take responsibility, that is a freedom of expression, and yes they will blame the other spouse because everyone wants to save face!!!! They say these lies so often that they start believing the lies.
Who wants to start a relationship with a cheater, or someone that has an impotency problem or someone who failed to communicate?
2007-03-21 16:16:53 · answer #6 · answered by SYLVIA S 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes I am guilty of blaming my husband for my problems. We would have been headed straight to a divorce if he hadn't left for Iraq 5 months ago. Being away from each other has made BOTH of us realize what we were doing, and what we were taking for granted. We both expected each other to be everything for each other. But you have to realize that you are in charge of your own happiness. Don't put that on someone else.
2007-03-21 16:18:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree. I try to weigh out as much as I can in any given situation and I always find that I am partly responsible, but ultimately that isn't the most important thing. Accepting/recognizing fault is important, but the most important thing is to lead to a common solution together.
2007-03-21 16:21:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some do, some don't. If you read these boards, they're full of people about to get married who don't want to, or who are desperate for their guy to love them or treat them well when they don't, and yes they stay--then complain when he makes them feel lousy, yet again! I think too many people don't actually sit down and think about the person they are about to marry before they do, and listen to their own instincts, and too many people are dating people they KNOW are wrong fro them, yet they prefer being in a state of coupled misery than single--THAT'S the big problem in my opinion.
2007-03-21 16:17:42 · answer #9 · answered by melouofs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I tell couples always that "each one of you is 100% responsible for this relationship!" The old concept of 50/50 is misleading, it suggests that all I have to do is 50% of the work-- Nope, you have to do 100% of your work and your partner has to do 100% of their work!!!!!!!! Any less (e.g., blaming, pulling the victimized card, refusing to do your best, etc.) and this is where problems begin
2007-03-21 16:15:59 · answer #10 · answered by Wisdom??? 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋