English valours are diferent from Brazil?

Question

I need help, Im brazilian and my boyfriend is from england, we argue a lot, cause I dont like that he still be with your ex-wife and ex-girlfriend`s photos with him. I not feel me well when i find this photos in our house, also, he want to maintain this friendship, but his ex-girlfriend still love him.I really not feel me well in this situation, cause in my country, its not normal. Past be in past, not need be between 2 persons that want start a new life.I need hear some opinions about, and sorry for my bad english, Thanks

Answer 1

tell him what you feel comfortable about and what you don't, tell him him [if he doesn't care] what you will accept and what you won't, this 'other girl' thing is causing you much heartache.you are right, i am just like you, there should be no yesterday in today,

Answer 2

If you are suggesting that the photo's are up and on display then I think he is in the wrong and should remove them, if they are put away in a box or similar then I don't think it is reasonable to ask him to destroy them. I take many photo's they are a record of my life both good and bad, I would hate anyone to insist that they should be destroyed because my past should be forgotten.
As to a friendship with an ex, this can be a difficult thing and it's understandable why you might have some issues with this, I guess it depends on the circumstances, I've known it work but if you are strongly against it then he should respect that.

Answer 3

I am part Brazilian, we must be on the same page about this one, don't like it either.My husband is American. My present husband had all kinds of old photos of his ex-wife lying around the house. He said he felt bad as he thought the kids might want the pictures some day, which knowing the kids I don't thing they care one way or the other, especially as they are grown men. I thought it was strange, I suggested him organizing them in an old shoe box and putting them away in the basement or attic. I told my husband he needed to clean them up or I was going to start laying out all my old pictures around the house, so he could see what if felt like. He must have agreed with me that it would not be good, as next day I came home from work and he was burning them in fireplace. The past is the past, but some people feel like it's throwing away a piece of their history by ridding themselves of those pictures. I told my husband the same thing, maybe it is a cultural thing. I was happy that he was trying to make me happy, and I appreciated that he care enough about me to try to understand. Don't think about it too much, as maybe the pictures do not mean that much to him, and he is just lazy about cleaning them up and putting them away.

Answer 4

it appears that values are not so different. It would seem that he might have some reason to keep a pic or two of his ex wife. But ex girlfriend is clearly unreasonable and selfish.

If he`s not ready to move on or still holds a flame for his exes perhaps you might be better off with someone else who is more considerate of your feelings.