I have this friend who has once again gone totally off the rails. We've been friends for the last 20 years but she keeps dumping on me all the time. The latest one is definately the worst though. She recently split with her husband who was a heavy drinker and used to hit her. But since they split she's turned into a complete slapper. She's sleeping with anyone and everyone,(including my next door neighbours husband who's old enough to be her grandad!!!!!!!) she's drunk all the time and i've recently found out she's taking drugs. She has a very young daughter who she dumps on any1 she can so she can go out. She has also slept with another of my friends blokes which caused them to split up and I got in trouble for not telling her about it. Now my other friend won't talk to me.
She also constantly puts me down saying a life at home with two kids is no life at all and says i'm boring. She's causing so much trouble what should i do?
2007-03-21 08:05:21 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
she has a problem....and she needs to hit a low and start again......u have to look after urself....u cant be there for her........she needs help she is obviously breaking down but she needs to realise it......is there no other family that can take the child away from this if not maybe social service.....as hard as it is to this to ur friend it might be what she needs ya know!!!! but look after ur self and try not to let her hurt u.......its not her fault.....she's a sick person!!!!
2007-03-21 08:14:46 · answer #1 · answered by misssherlock06 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well in my opinion she isn't a real friend to you. If she got you into trouble for keeping her seedy secret then she doesn't care how you feel, it seems you're just their to cover for her and look after her daughter. I'm all for giving people a second chance but it sounds like you have put up with her long enough. She's on drugs which is a danger to you and your children, do you want them to be around a person who is sleeping around and drugged-up? Tell her you've had enough, your priority is your children and you need friends who are going to be loyal to you. Maybe if she cleans up her act and learns a little respect you could then consider becoming friends with her again. It'll be hard for you because you've known her for so long but maybe it will make her realise what she's losing by acting that way.
Good luck hun and be strong x x
2007-03-21 08:18:10 · answer #2 · answered by Princess 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think I can safely say your mate needs a physical and verbal slap!
I have a mate who left her abusive husband lost 11st and became a complete slapper, but she had to get it out of her system so I kind of empathised. But christ, when you have kids, you need a reality check.
Talk to her like you hate her, and tell her the truth, if you've been mates for that long then she will be expecting it from you as her FRIEND.
That is what good friends do!
(Don't quit on her, she obviously needs your ying to her yang!)
2007-03-21 09:07:22 · answer #3 · answered by RedSnook 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it would be good for you to sit her down and tell her a few home truths. Say that the way she is acting isnt a suitable role model for her child and surely she doesnt want her child blaming herself. Also if she caries on like this then social services may get involved and take her child from her. You should try and say you understand she has had a hard time and you will allways be there for her, but she needs to be there for her child because im sure she is finding things dificult. Be there for your friend but tell her she needs to stop these things for the sake of her daughter
2007-03-21 08:13:31 · answer #4 · answered by crazyicklepwincess 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your friend has a very low self-esteem, she has been abused, her relationship has broken up & now she feels lost & unloved, & by the sound of it punch drunk, so she's craving love but at the same time, she's lashing out, cos she's hurting.
I've recently been on the receiving end of that sort of behaviour & it is so hard emotionally to be someone's punch bag... there's only so many punches you can take...
Is she out of control? Is she drinking in front of her kid/s & drunk (or drugged) when in charge of her kid/s? if so, that's really stupid, neglectful, dangerous & illegal. Spell that out clearly to her!
WARN her of the possible consequences.
If still refuses to clean up her act, for the sake of her children, you need to inform social services, to request their intervention.
Then withdraw & hope (& pray) they do their job!
Good luck.
2007-03-21 09:08:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that she needs to pull her life together.Buy her Nicorrette and offer to set her up with a nice guy.She must be very depressed.Give her some time.Talk to your neighbor about their activities.Offer your friend a chance to participate in some very enriching activities,such as bowling,swimming,or football (soccer).
2007-03-21 11:22:52 · answer #6 · answered by callena 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my god, what an awful situation for the little girl ... I think you are going to have to involve the law on this one, get that child out of the house and someplace safe. Then refuse to have anything more to do with your 'friend' ... you can't help her if she doesn't want to be helped, and it sounds like she doesn't care at all who she hurts to get what she wants.
2007-03-21 08:50:49 · answer #7 · answered by Orla C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stage an intervention with all her friends and family - that way she realizes "everyone is on to her" and from there, it's all up to her - you can't help someone that doesn't want to help themselves!
2007-03-21 08:25:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if it was my friend i would tell her where to go,she is no mate when she can do that to you and her other friends,cut all strings with her and get on with your own life.She will need you before you need her.
2007-03-21 08:11:02 · answer #9 · answered by Dooby 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes
2007-03-21 08:22:07 · answer #10 · answered by ¤€dgë™ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋