I don't take them personally, because the people that said and did these things to me, showed themselves to be people that don't have much character by the way they behaved. Their personal insults towards me were mean and harsh... but it just showed that as adults they certainly don't have good skills for dealing with things in other people that they don't understand or value. So, with these insights, I am not taking it peronally.. but every day, about 30 times, it pops into my head and bothers me... when will I be able to shrug off that these people harshly cristized me?
2007-03-21 07:52:06 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It is hard not to take insults personal. But one thing you have to remind yourself is: Did you do these things? if not- then it is their problem (basically they own this problem not you). If you did: Have you asked them to forgive you? (If so- then again it is their problem). When people act in these hurtful ways- most of the time it is because they are struggling themselves with something. I suppose trying to make themselves feel better. NOT!!. Basically what I am saying is: you don't personally own these insults or hurtful things- the other person does.
Another thing that you can try is: set aside a time of day: Say to yourself today I am not going to think about this until 6pm and at 615 I will be done thinking about it until tomorrow. If you catch yourself thinking before then remember that you have set aside a time. If you really try this is can work- and it lessens the worry.
Just a thought!
2007-03-21 08:06:16 · answer #1 · answered by butterfly 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, be really strict with yourself and examine if there is any possibility there is any truth at all in the insults. Be honest with yourself and accept it IF there is even a slight truth there. IF THERE is no truth in the insults, you have to think about why they acted like that. Is it their low level of E Q ? Is it because they have their own problems and lash out at others? Or are they just nasty, unthinking people? Unfortunately there are many of those around aren't there?
In time you just learn that real friends are few and far between and very precious. So you keep up your relationships with these few trusted souls and keep everyone else in the 'aquaintance' section! Life is full of pain, along with the joy, and if we can learn something about ourselves and others from it, then it's not in vain. All we can do is not stoop to such people's level, live the exemplary life as much as possible, at least you'll feel good about yourself, whatever anyone else thinks.
2007-03-21 08:26:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are taking it personally and that is why it keeps popping into your head. In some way, you are doubting yourself and by doing so giving the "words/insults" more credit than they deserve. We all have big egos - and we don't like to hear criticism of any sort - whether it's real or not, we don't like it. These words have a lot of power on your life right now and it is because you are letting them have that power. When it pops in your head - IMMEDIATELY redirect your thoughts to something positive that someone has said to you in the past and do that again and again and again and again until it stops. Eventually, when you believe the praise you are "hearing" you will no longer believe the criticism that was undeserved.
Words are very but if these folks aren't family members or very close friends with a long history with you - don't give their words that much credit. They haven't earned it.
You'll be fine - just redirect, redirect, redirect. Write one of those lines of praise down now. I think it is very mature of you to be able to see these incidents in a calm manner and not respond to them at their level. That is an admirable trait!
2007-03-21 08:17:24 · answer #3 · answered by Stefka 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being the recipient of anything harsh and hurtful hurts even if you can rationalize the person it came from. How about writing down the comments on a piece of paper and put the paper in a big pan and set it on fire (have water nearby just in case) or bury the paper in the back yard. This would symbolize you letting these things go and maybe your mind will follow your actions. Good luck and God Bless.
2007-03-21 08:09:07 · answer #4 · answered by tersey562 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My son, who purely became 9 2 weeks in the past, has a large style of the comparable habit you defined. I easily have long previous so some distance as to make an appointment with the pediatrician, hoping the wide-unfold practitioner might have some suggestion on the thank you to handle him. i think of the habit being displayed is generic for toddlers those days yet i don't discover it suitable. My son gets that clean stare additionally on each occasion I ask him to do his chores. He has refused to do his chores and as quickly as I attempt to enforce our regulations he has even gotten violent and hit me. I spank my toddlers while the area demands it, although I easily have given up spanking his because of the fact it purely will become a wrestling tournament. I easily have tried doing away with issues that he likes ( like video games, pals, and tv), and that i've got tried different forms of punishments like increasing his chores. not something has labored and his habit seems to be getting extra disrespectful. He says very hurtful issues to his father and that i or maybe instructed his proper at school that he replaced into being abused at abode. as quickly as baby secure amenities have been given in touch he admitted he lied concerning to the accusations. i'm sorry i don't have plenty suggestion for you because of the fact I easily have yet to be sure the thank you to effectively handle my own baby. whether, purely be reassured which you're actually not on my own. Be consistant and with a bit of luck your baby will comprehend the version between what's suitable and what isn't. solid luck!
2016-10-19 06:43:15 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First thing it will take is time. You just have to accept that and move on. One thing you can do (and I think you already did) is just consider the source and let it go. Hurt is a strong emotion and hard to overcome overnight. If it was a trusted friend or relative, it is even harder to let it go. Time does heal all wounds. Learn and grow from it, it will make you stronger the next time.
2007-03-21 08:06:09 · answer #6 · answered by jimmer256 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These people are not worth bothering about and it sounds as though you understand that.
Just keep yourself busy thinking about all the good people and things in you life.If they pop into your head just get busy doing something to get your mind off of them and eventually it will all go away.The trick is to keep yourself occupied with other things.
You know the old saying: sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never harm me.So True.
2007-03-21 08:02:53 · answer #7 · answered by sonnyboy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me know how you get rid of it......I am struggling with about the same issues. I will definately check back to see the advice everyone gives you.
2007-03-21 07:57:36 · answer #8 · answered by Boo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry, God leads everyone towards his/her kind of people. So if you are good then you will find good people one day. Good Luck
2007-03-21 07:57:56 · answer #9 · answered by Goldman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As hard as it may seem YOU are the only person that can answer this.
2007-03-21 08:03:09 · answer #10 · answered by Monty L 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋