How can I successfully negotiate in a conflict with someone?

Question

What does it mean to "negotiate" and how should I go about doing that with a boyfriend who Ive come to find out that he has been cheating?

Answer 1

to negotiate is talk everything over til you come to a compromise.. do you want to do that in this case? you will have to probably be willing to forgive and forget and him promise never to do it again... can you do that? if not you probably dont need to negotiate anything except when hes getting his stuff packed and out the door

Answer 2

Well to begin with negotiate means to try to come to an agreement by proposing different solutions.
Next, I am wondering what you have to negotiate with a boyfriend who has cheated on you other than if you have children and need to agree on co parenting issues. Other than that there is no negotiating required just walk away! That automatically makes you the winner!

Answer 3

Loosely defined, negotiation in a love relationship is the process of talking and listening in the hope of reaching a solution that is agreeable to both parties.

In your particular case, what you can do is have a serious talk with your bf. I would suggest a quiet restaurant or a park (any public place to ensure that the talk will not escalate to a shouting match). Calmly tell him of your "suspicions" and provide your proof, if you have any. But if what you have is pure hearsay, then you're toast. Hearsay is not a valid argument.

Now, listen to what he has to say. Just listen. Don't interrupt his confession or excuses. Then if what is he saying is believable to you, work out some agreements to prevent future occurrences of the same problem. If apologies are called for, do it.

In order for the negotiation process to be successful, both parties must be willing to admit their mistakes and must show genuine efforts to remedy the situation so that the same mistakes could be avoided and/or corrected.

Good luck.

Answer 4

well to negotiate means, in general, to come to an understanding or agreement met by both parties. The true quesiton is not about your boyfriend but about you? The question is what are you worth? Do you deserve better than someone who can't give you all of his love and trust? Or do you feel you just don't have that type of relationship with him and you just don't want that type of relationship. It is all relevant to what you want and feel you deserve then you need to go out and get it. If this "boyfriend" isn't meeting up to those standards then find someone who will. In the mean time take up a hobby you have always wanted to do or fill your time with friends you know who love you for who you are.

Answer 5

This is very personal and You certainly have the right to express Your pain and disappointment prior to "negotiating a settlement"
Because we are human and frail, in-cure pain and loss, we are ,likely presented with the prime obstacle to negotiating.........prejudice, obstinate positions , self interest, and avoidance of more pain/loss.
To be successfull in negotiations it helps to understand Your counter-parts position: To genuinely listen to content You may not like or feel comfortable with: Don't ensue negotiations until You are in the right place( the forgoing).Ultimately...Forgiveness, perhaps the highest aspiration of humanity, is what we all seek but seldom administer.
Sounds like You have a good heart and will, likely be successful.

Answer 6

You don't need to negotiate, you need to break up with him. You found out your man is cheating on you and you want to negotiate? That makes no sense. Get some self respect and dump him. Thank you and good luck.

Answer 7

well to negotiate is to figure out a way to make things work better threw any means passable ,enhance communication,improve reporting systems etc...,but with this case it seem like negotiations aren't the factor here ..what seems to be the problem is respect,trust and honesty..what needs to be done is figure out what can be salvaged from where you are at now.can you forgive ,do you care ? or is it an open relationship ..??is it a commitment from now forward..good luck if you can make it threw this and he don't continue to do it you have something good ,but it will take a lot of W O R K luck to you

Answer 8

That totally depends on you, whether or not your willing to except this kind of behaviour and forgive. Your not selling something here rather showing him what he can do to you, no negotiating in this situation is necessary, you just don't. Show him you will in no way tolerate this in a relationship and say good-bye. Your strength and character will be strong if you show respect for yourself.

Answer 9

I suspect what you want is how to approach the subject without being emotional.

If that's what you are looking for then you do something like this: Tell him you know what he's been up to and his behavior is unacceptable. Tell him it's over and you no longer want any type of contact.

If you know for sure he's been cheating, do not give him the kindness of listening to his response. Let him watch you walk away.

Answer 10

there is a book called difficult conversations. i just read it for a class it is well worth the buy. i forgot who wrote it. but one thing i do now is if the person is raising there voice talk quieter than them. it will get them to calm down because they see that you are not as worked up.