are people who are abused, and then go onto abuse themselves, are they demonized the same as?

Question

molesters? and can they be treated? with therapy?

Answer 1

My mother was abused as a child. In turn, she abused me -- emotionally, physically, verbally. At one point, she was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and it was determined that her behavior was a way of gaining what she saw as some control over her life. She was treated -- medicated with Valium. As long as she took her medication, everything was fine. Now she's off meds, and, guess what, I'm out of the house.

I learned to hit and humiliate from my mother. Does this mean I'm a monster? I should be locked away? No. I've learned from the outside world, friends, the rest of the family, that my mother's damage can be undone, and there are better ways to express anger and find control. It's called dancing, paintball, work, art, archery. Whatever works.

Am I a functioning member of society now? Well, I'm in my fourth year of college, and I have an office job, so that would be a yes.

So answer it yourself -- should we be locked away? Can we be "cured"? Are we monsters?

Answer 2

It seems to me that the public at large are reluctant to accept that abusers who have been abused deserve any compassion.
This does NOT in my view make their offences any less serious or deserving of a lesser prison sentence.
The problem is that these offenders are segregated with others who have committed worse crimes against children. Not only do they learn new techniques for getting to children and avoiding detection, but they come under the influence of those sicker than they are.
Treatment programmes can be effective if managed properly. The problem is there are too few of them (one in the whole of England), and that local people panic at the idea of paedophiles being treated locally. Then there is the problem of supervision outside prison. The current climate of hatred whipped up by the media makes it very difficult for paedophiles to build up the secure life they need to avoid re-offending.
When I was young, the children were told who to avoid, and what tricks might be used to get you to go inside. Everyone knew who the local paedophile was, and they were tolerated because they were known and therefore could be supervised by the neighbours.

Answer 3

No. I have been emotionally, physically abused and suffered sexual harrassment/bullying, but I do not abuse. Had clinical depression through it and have had treatment for it. It is a myth that people like me abuse other because I have been abused. Having been abused, it is easy to spot an abuser. To molest is a power issue and this needs to be addressed in therapy.

Answer 4

Yes.

People have to be responsible for their own actions. We like to lay blame all over the place, but when it comes down to it, we can control our behavior regardless of abuse.

Answer 5

i was abused as a child after i got out of it when i was "bad" i would then punish myself by physically harming myself. iv got out of that now with the help of my bf. but i would never hurt my bf and have always said that if i ever hit him i would leave because i dont want to be like my dad i dont want the person i love more than life itself to be scared of me.
the answer to your question is it depends on the person really.

Answer 6

I have heard many times that Abusers cannot be successfully treated......

Answer 7

there is a specific therapy for these kind of perssons.

Answer 8

they are no better then the people that did it to them and yes they need help with therapy.
They are a risk to others and it needs to be dealt with

Answer 9

One would hope so.