I recently discovered my wife cheating and it has torn my world apart. I treated her right and I helped her every step of the way raising our kids until now. I quit, if she wasn't satisfied before she will be really unsatisfied now. I have already spent every penny I had. I quit working and quit paying the bills. I am now gonna deny paternity of our kids (which I know for a fact are mine) and just walk away. I was there and I was a good husband, I treated her right and made plenty of money. I QUIT!!!!! Now i'm gonna be what is commonly called a "deadbeat dad". I will have nothing to do with her or her children because they aren't mine ; ). I will go to jail in order to give her nothing. I don't care anymore
2007-03-20 19:50:30 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Frankly she should have thought about the kids when she was putting them in the livingroom with a movie to **** her boyfriend in my bedroom. Screw any of you whiny pussy motherf***ers that wanna give me **** about the kids!!! The ***** watches maury everyday. She had a devoted man. She ****** that away and now she is gonna suffer for it and so are the kids. So ******* what?
2007-03-20 20:01:18 · update #1
I am so ****** up by all this!!! I don't know what to do anymore. I love my kids and it is just the anger talking. I won't ditch my kids but I feel so worthless and small like I don't matter at all. I just want to make her hurt like I am
2007-03-20 20:12:27 · update #2
Pull yourself together
I think you should give your wife chance.In that way the problem may be solved.You know,its your childrens who is trapped in these kinds of problems.Sit down and think about them.
All the best....
2007-03-20 20:05:48 · answer #1 · answered by ♥★pinky★♥ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Even if your wife is the biggest whore in the entire town, you don't walk away from your kids. They will ALWAYS be your kids and now more than ever, they need you.
Why not ask for sole custody of the kids? If she's as big of a whore as you make her out to be, you might be able to pull it off. You need to see an attorney ASAP. I would not say jack to her, stay away from her, do nothing to antagonize but when the court hearing comes along, zap her butt with proof that she's fooled around, that she's an unfit mother and ask for sole custody of the kids, if possible.
Even if that doesn't happen, and the judge awards her custody, DO NOT take it out on the kids by not paying child support. That's not getting back at her, that's taking out your anger on the kids. Keep good records of all the times you paid child support so that if there is any question, you can prove you did what you could and what was required financially to support your kids.
If you think she's spending the money on herself while your kids are doing without, you have the right to question that with Child Support Enforcement. However, you need proof of this and not some wild allegation of what you suspect.
No matter what, be there for your kids emotionally. They need you now more than ever. Talk to them everyday, be there for special events and occasions, school events, etc. Stay connected in their lives. NEVER, EVER use them as a weapon against your soon to be ex wife.
Finally, I know it's hard but you have to try to move on and make a new life for yourself. There is a French saying that the best revenge if to live well. Get a new job and work incredibly hard to do well in it. Save your money and invest it. Eventually, you'll find someone new in your life to trust and love deeply.
You can do it, one step at a time. Hang in there and good luck!
2007-03-20 22:50:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't understand if this is a question or a statement..
Anyway..I can tell you're angry with your cheating ho wife. I don't blame you, cheaters are the lowest form of life and do not deserve any form of happiness..but, it's not your kids fault.
They are yours. Will punishing them make you feel better? The Ho-Bag will end up coming off looking like a saint and everyone will say "no wonder she cheated with a husband like that".
You're looking for revenge, but your are willing yourself into a place for LOSERS, she has ripped your heart out and now you are allowing your anger to ruin the rest of your life too.
Remember, the best form of revenge is success. Pick yourself up out of the bin where you threw yourself, that's where she belongs, not you. Hold your head high and continue to be the success that you are without her.
But don't give up on your babies, they will need you in the future. Be someone that they can be proud of , someone they can rely on. If your wife can through away your relationship so easily, she'll do the same to them..then who will they have?
2007-03-20 20:07:18 · answer #3 · answered by Jamie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen... no matter what you feel about the wife, it isn't the children's fault.
To them YOU are daddy, not some other d!ckhead. Plus it's already too late to deny paternity, even if you have a DNA test done. You've already acknowledged them as your children and have been rasing them as such. No Judge in the U.S. will deny you paternity. Sorry but you're stuck.
Me and my wife of 13 yrs have no children, but I let her know that if she were to get pregnant, there WILL be a DNA test. She got huffy, but I let her know that I will not be rasing someone else's little bastard.
The BEST revenge on this woman would be to take custody of the children, and be a good father.
2007-03-20 22:15:50 · answer #4 · answered by Larry F 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm sorry that you are so angry and resentful towards your wife, but your kids is a whole different story. What we do as grown ups and how we f*** up as grown ups should never ever affect our children. You cannot abandon them now. This is the time when you need to step up fight for your kids. Its pretty obvious now that you're wife was not happy with you and the relationship and she is a very bad person by not telling you straight out that it was over and she wanted to move on. But honey your kids are a whole different story. you cant quit on them now, they need you more than ever. They will probably not even be important to her if she is into somebody else, do you want your kids suffering. Don't get mad at them just because of where they came from. Your kids deserve to have a father with them, you are their father you even said it yourself. Do you want them to grow up and hate you for what you are doing and might do? Do you want them to become bad people, is that want you want for them? Its a shame and I pity you because you brought into this world angels that should not suffer because of actions and things we do as grown ups. I will pray that you realize that you are making a big mistake.
2007-03-20 20:03:11 · answer #5 · answered by Alex 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your not hurting your wife your hurting yourself and your children. instead of letting her drag you down you need to work harder and care for your children because one day you will regret walking away. it is time to step up and be a man. why would anyone with sense brag about being a deadbeat dad. this is ridiculous. because your name is on the birthcertificate you are legally responsible. you had rather go to jail than support your children and your ex. is she worth giving up your freedom. why not get joint custody and pay her nothing!!!!! be a father to your children because they are going to need you. right now you have as much right to the kids as she does. go home and change the locks and ask her to leave. tell her she is not going to live in your house and bring her boyfriends around your children. get a lawyer and start things rolling. why to men always think that the women automatically get to keep the kids. just tell her you can go but you are not taking my children!!!
2007-03-20 20:01:08 · answer #6 · answered by misse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont do what your doing! I think you need to sit down and have a very long talk with her and tell her how you feel and say everything you said on here to her. She needs to know how you feel or she wont care she will just find a boyfriend who has money or has a good job. Even though she did all of that there is still hope and think about your kids dont you think you should still love them. They still love you and care dont you think THERE torn by you leaving and possibly going to jail and there such a thing called divorce.
2007-03-20 19:59:14 · answer #7 · answered by jessieroo8399 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Jer, I know how you feel,my ex cheated on me to. Don't let the hurt and hate make you not want to claim your own kids. Why hurt them like this,they have done nothing to deserve what you intend to do. You will never forgive yourself if you turn your back on your kids. Think about this before you take action. Remember child support isn't for her it's for you 2 kids. Do the right thing and be there for your kids.
A Friend.
Clowmy
2007-03-20 20:02:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are so angry about it all. Believe me when I say i'm in the same position as you without the kids. Do what you have to do but don't do something for the sake of revenge or hurting the other person. Their time will come.... What goes around comes around. You concentrate on you. Heal. Move on. Easier said than done, I know... But take it just one day at a time. Dun plan any revenge. It's not worth it.... She's not worth it.
2007-03-20 20:08:08 · answer #9 · answered by Sa-Anne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do NOT drag your kids into this. You have every right to be angry, enraged, hurt and disillusioned but this is not the kids fault. Whether you are their Dad or not they know you as Dad and it will tear their world apart too if you do this. They don't deserve it and in calmer moments you know that's true. They are the innocents in this situation. They deserve better and if she doesn't enough about them that she would do destroy their peace of mind you should. Be their hero. They will always thank you for that whatever happens in the future.
2007-03-20 20:04:52 · answer #10 · answered by MissWong 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right **** her, but take your kids with you, then she can't sit around watching Maury and f****ng some guy. If you take the kids she won't have a source of income from them (child support) you think the guy she's f****ng is gonna take care of her??? Hell no. She'll have to try to find a job and won't have time to **** guys any more. When she gets a job sue her for child support. That way your kids are taken care of and they don't have to witness what a slut their mom is.
2007-03-20 20:23:08 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋