excited, yet scared at the same time....?

Question

So my husband and I are about 7 weeks pregnant. When I first found out I was pregnant; I cried, and automatically assumed my life being over. Is that a normal reaction? I'm about 25, my husbands 36, and he's very ready for a baby. I on the other hand have lately accepted the fact and have gotten a little bit more excited, but that eery feeling of not having enough time b/n me and my husband, and especially not having enough time for myself...still lurks around. Are these feelings normal? Have any of you mothers out there ever felt this way & scared and doubtful? And any mothers out there, how is life now like with your child? Do you still feel attractive? And how's your love lives with your significant other going after child birth? My plan was to not have kids till I was 27/28, &wanted to focus on my thriving career and travel the world with my husband. And now that I'm pregnant, I feel like all my plans have just slipped out of my hands. I'm just trying to be honest, can ne1 relate?

Answer 1

Let me tell you, I'm 18 weeks today (24 years old) and I feel so much better knowing that I'm not the only one who feels like that! Yes, I've heard it is very normal, I mean, your life is going to completely change. I think it's perfectly normal to be scared. I'm a student, I planned to finish my BA this Dec. and start my MA in January and sometime towards the end of next year or the year after start "thinking" about starting a family. Plans don't always work out "as planned" lol I seriously almost fainted when I saw my positive pregnancy test, my husband had to sit me down and fan me. All I could think was my life was over, I would no longer be able to freely travel, and going to school was going to be so difficult. Then I had my first sonogram, and I fell in love! I think one thing that has really helped me get that scared and "my life is over" feeling out of my mind is knowing that there are thousands of women out there that would give everything to be where we are, "pregnant"! It truly is a blessing, and sometimes God wants us to do things now, rather than the way we planned them.
As for your relationship with your husband, it will change, thats a guarantee. And it will start to change now while you are pregnant. You just need to set special time together where you do not talk about the baby, and you focus on eachother. Believe me, you will get to the point where "ALL" you talk about is the baby, but talk about yourselves and how your day was and still continue to express love to eachother, especially once the baby is born. It's hard to focus on eachother everynow and then when you have this wonderful little bundle of joy on your mind, but your relationship needs it. The funny thing is that you will fall in love all over again with your husband for very unromantic reasons! I feel so incredibly close to my husband now because I'm carrying a little person that the two of us created, and thats amazing!
I think you will start to feel better about the whole thing soon. Maybe being afraid won't go away, but you will love this experience! And yes, your feelings are VERY normal!
Congratulations!!

Answer 2

I am the mother of a 4 week old boy (i am 32, husband is 36). I am not sure that you are ever ready for the life changing experience ahead of you so dont dwell on the bad things that might not happen.

Fortunately we travelled etc but we still enjoyed an active social life which unless you have great baby sitters will inevitably come to an end. I feel that mine has and it saddens me but you will love that little baby so much and life isnt over it is just different. I am sure one day when we do get to finally enjoy a night out it will be all the better becuase it will be a rare occasion.

My advice to you is to eat sensibly so that when you have your baby you dont have excess weight that might make you feel unattractive. I ate well and exercised all the way through and i was back to my pre preg weight in 7 days. Dont use being pregnant as as excuse to let yourself go - try to wear clothes that flatter your bump and take care of yourself.

Most of all good luck - as i said dont dwell on the things that may not happen - a change is as good as a holiday and one day you will wonder how you lived without that little person.

Congrats and good luck. - I had time to write this response with a 4 week old so all hope is not lost - you will have time with hubby. I may not say that in 6 months time when my baby is clinging to my leg screaming - but i guess life from now on will be different.

Answer 3

I'm 19 and got pregnant by my boyfriend of three years. I'm also a full time college student. When I found out I was pregnant, I freaked out. So, getting worried and freaking out a little isn't uncommon. A lot of women go through that stage. I've had 5 months to adjust go the thought of having a baby, so I'm not really upset about it anymore. I'm worried still, but yet excited at the same time.

I'm sure that even though you have these feelings, as the months go by, your feelings will change. You'll get more excited and accepting. Especially when you find out what you're having!! =] And when you see your body developing (belly getting bigger). You have created something so special, you've created another life.

also with the attractive thing, I've dealt with weight issues and whatnot (before I got pregnant I weighed 90lbs) So, as the time went by and I gained the weight that I needed, I did feel unattractive, but I just think to myself that it's for the baby.

Things will fall into place. It'll take some time and patience, but it'll be okay.

I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 4

These feelings are totally normal and they don't go away! I'm 36 weeks now and feeling even more scared and excited than before. Advice that's been given to me is not to view it as the end of your life but as a totally new adventure that you can take with your partner. Sure, there's going to be issues you'll need to sort out along the way that you didn't think you'd have to deal with until much later, but I've heard that having kids is so much more rewarding than travelling the world etc.

I'd planned to work through until now but I've had severe morning sickness from 7 weeks so had to quit and haven't been able to do much since. So much for plans!!!

Goodluck

Answer 5

Here's a very short story of my life.

Never wanted children or to get married.

Got pregnant when I was 15 and kept the baby.
Got pregnant with number 2 when I was 20.
Got married at 22 and am now pregnant with number 3.

I absolutely love my children and my husband. But the moral of my story is this:

"God had different plans for me than what I had for me. Today, I live for God. "

Answer 6

I think it's totally normal to feel scared and even doubt your decision to conceive, but let me promise you that anything you think you will be missing out on will pale in comparison to what you will experience as a mother. ONE look into that newborn baby's eyes and your heart grows tenfold. It's like no other feeling in the world!!! You will fall in love all over again. Motherhood isn't always fun, but the good days FAR exceed the days that seem to never end. Just one "I love you mommy" is all it takes for my day to end on a good note!

Good luck and don't worry - it all works out and if you have a good marriage becoming parents will bring you closer together. And about your career - you CAN have it all if you have a good support system.

Answer 7

Had my daughter at 25 and I was unsure and scared about being a mom. Your priorities change afterwords. Some of the things that you mentioned such as travel, career and appearance are still important, but your feelings change about them. Your plans change to include your child and you will enjoy your new priorities. At first it is overwhelming because you have so many unanswered questions. After you have your baby you will find out that there is nothing that compares to being a parent. It is absolutely the best!!!