I've been broken up from my ex now for about 3 weeks, I got tired of him treating me like I was nothing. I felt like I was in a relationship by myself. Its just him and his mother and he acted like nothing mattered except for him and his mother. Its just really hard not to contact him because I went out with him for 2 years. I want to call him but I'm afraid that he already has someone else, and since I still love him I rather not know, so I don't have to go through that pain. He has not called me. I tried to talk to him about how I feel but he tells me he doesn't care. Do you think I'm doing the right thing by leaving him?
Any advice will be appreciated.
2007-03-20 15:32:52 · 36 answers · asked by KerryAnn 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to tap into those feelings you had when he made you feel like you were nothing. Then ask yourself if you really want to go back to him. remember, if he treated you that way, he will probably treat the next girl that way until he gets rid of his real "girlfriend," his mother!
2007-03-20 15:38:28 · answer #1 · answered by lilgracie 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely u were right for calling it off. A relationship has no room for selfishness and that sounds like what he was.
U want to call him because he is what is ur used to. Dont do it. Just let it alone and get yourself together. When u feel like calling him, write down in a letter what u want to say. It helps u to release your feelings without being involved with him and reattaching yourself.
U will eventually get to the point where u dont think of him much, but he is somewhat a habit at the moment and one that u will have to break. U have been with him for a very long time, and u cant expect it to happen overnight or even in 3 weeks.
Let him treat his next lil gal like nothing. He will never have a successful relationship until he learns to give of himself too. U did the right thing hun. U deserve better and u will find better.
Fill your time with friends who will get u out of the house and surround yourself with eligible men who know how to treat a lady. U will find mr. right amongst them somewhere. Just dont give up and call him due to loneliness. Thats a common mistake. U mistake love for loneliness.
Good luck to u hun. U will make it, just gonna have to give it some time.
U have just made the realization that few people ever do and that is "Sometimes love just isnt enough"
Best wishes for a bright future.
2007-03-20 15:44:21 · answer #2 · answered by Truth Teller 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you absolutely did the right thing. Please don't contact him again. It will make you feel more in control of yourself if you don't, and you need to have that self-respect. It sounds like he took a lot from you, and now you're hurting because you still want to give more. Tell yourself to just wait...your love is worth so much more than that, and there is someone out there who will treat you right and make everything you have gone through worth while. It won't feel like it for now, but believe me, the time will come when you are so RELIEVED that you made the right decision and changed your whole life for the better. Hang on! Find consolation in something...ice cream, friends, a new pair of shoes, hard work (have any spring cleaning to do?), and a good book or movie. You are strong--you've proven that...now don't let up. Good luck!
2007-03-20 15:39:59 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
kerry ann why on earth would you want to go back? you said it yourself, you were in a relationship by yourself and he was in a relationship with his mother. and if he is still there after two years, she has him by the short hairs and will never let him go. and it doesn't sound like he wants to be let go of.
and by the way, if he has already replaced you after three short weeks, then he really is a bit of a slime. pity that poor girl kerry ann, in a couple of years she will be in the same boat you are in right now! by then you will have forgotten all about the jerk and found yourself a new life. a better life.
so, you let it go, yes it hurts, but time will help heal the pain. meanwhile if you are sitting wallowing in self-pity, someone terrific might be right in front of you and you won't see him.
get up, step away from the computer, grab a shower, and get outside for some fresh air.
hit the stores, call some friends, go to the movies, have fun. enjoy life a little.
good luck! take care.
2007-03-20 15:42:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dear.... trust me!! You are doing the RIGHT thing!!!
There's NOTHING better than to leave him behind...!!!! He is not the only dude on this planet... You can find any other men... a wonderful loving guy that treats you like you need to be treated... that will care for you like you care for him....
If he don't even call you... what would make you think he wants something with you?... No, no, no, no, nouu! ....
Send him flying.... let other people in your life...
You can give yourself time... and then let others in... that will appreciate you!
good luck :-)
2007-03-20 15:38:48 · answer #5 · answered by Lizzeth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you're doing the right thing. Sometimes the hardest part of breaking up is learning how to be alone again. Get out with friends, take a class, hit the gym, do something to improve yourself and make yourself happy.
Write down everything that was wrong in the relationship and then how you can learn from each problem. When you feel like calling him, get out the list instead.
2007-03-20 15:38:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Yes, don't let anyone treat you like that. My wife did the same thing and now I am not chasing her at all, I learned that by chasing I'm only putting my self down, you tried talking if he doesn't care well guess what move on and you'll find some one that will care about you, that will want to be around you and show you the love and care.
Good Luck!!
2007-03-20 15:47:38 · answer #7 · answered by Sam 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
>>YES!! You are doing the right thing!! Listen to your intuition!! I broke up with my ex for about a month about 3 years into our relationship. I finally broke down and called him. We got back together for 6 more awful years. I kept telling myself that I loved him even when my intuition kept telling me to run. Keep on going, this heartache will pass and you will move on to a much better relationship. Take some time off though to get to know your own likes and dislikes again. You deserve better than what he has to offer.
I love Luisa's idea of a list!
2007-03-20 15:38:55 · answer #8 · answered by Yahoogirl 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry. If you felt he was no giving you what you needed, then you were right to end it. It may be hard, but in time you'll meet somebody else and realize the break-up was what you needed for you to grow. Ending a relationship in not easy, but, if you felt alone while with him, you were already by your self. Focus on you and each day it will get easier to be without him. Good luck.
2007-03-20 15:40:21 · answer #9 · answered by tigerprincess_bee 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only you can answer that question. Either way, give yourself some time. Change can take a while to get used to. You may decide with some time that you want something different for your life. You deserve someone who will love you the way you love them. Dating should be the easier part of the relationship - it only gets more diificult with marriage. I wish you the best of luck.
2007-03-20 19:00:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋