Couples question!?

Question

My husband and I worked out that, after the birth of our child, (I also have a 7 year old and a 3 year old) I would go back to work and he would stay at home and be with the kids since I made more money. He agreed to get a part time job down the road. After 3 weeks, he has had such a problem with the arrangement, that tonight he asked for a separation. A few days ago, I told him that I would do whatever I could to help him get a job and let him out of the house since I saw that he wasn't dealing with the situation. Today I came home early from work to watch the baby so he could look for a job. He went one place and stopped looking. We have had problems in the past, but things were better right up until the time he quit his job.(which he hated and wanted to leave anyway.) He says that he still loves me, but has now moved out of the house. Can anyone make heads or tails of this? Has anyone been in a similar situation?

He's moved back with his mom, sister, her husband and her kids (they all live together.)

Answer 1

the basic problem is just that he doesnt wanna survive on his woman's income. he is damn willing to make his own money and get rid of the household chores. so try that. if possible at ur end search him a gud job. in the beginning it wud b hard for u to manage both office and house, but it wud b worth gud coz at the end of the day u both love eachother and wanna sit in each other's company rather than one sitting at one corner and the other at his mom's place. and above all its just the kids who r gonna suffer. so try to make a happy home.
all the best.

Answer 2

Well guy's are really weird at times maybe he just needs sometime to think about what he needs to do in his life. With you having a job that makes more money then he does that usually makes guys feel worthless and insecure like he cant support you and his kids. You should get a babysitter and have a nice night out with him alone and talk about what has been going on in the relationship and tell him how you feel about it and ask him about his feelings on certain things. Another possibility would be that he has lost love for you and he is with someone else or he is looking for someone else.. Well anyway this is only my opinion I really hope that it helps in some way.

Answer 3

Holy cow! Girl I cannot help but feel that he has been feeling this way for awhile. Where did he move to? I'm sorry sounds like he was looking for an excuse. And lets face some things here I am a man and when I first took over the at home dad thing I could not for the life of me figure out how in the world my fiance did what she did. I went out of my mind for the first 2 months. Ever see the movie Mr. MOM holy cow did I feel like that guy, I didnt have neighbirs to help though. you might want to ask him if there was anything you could do to help him asume this position. Sounds to me there was definatley a lack of communication somewhere.

Good Luck and keep your head up

Answer 4

I think if you could both sit down and write out what you each want out of the relationship and what you each feel would be in the best interest of your children that would be a good starting point.

He obviously does not want to stay home with the kids, understandable...it's tough, but he needs to be willing to get a job that is going to make up for what you would not be making if you left your job.

For him to pack up and leave makes me think that he is overwhelmed with the situation of 3 kids and one income and the responsibilities and sacrifices that come with the package. Vows state "for better and for worse" and if he meant that and loves you and your children then he will be willing to do whatever it takes to make the family unit as a whole work.

Good luck, and I hope it works out.

Answer 5

Sounds like an excuse. I knew a guy who has done something similar to a friend of mine. Guy said he'd stay home with their daughter and than bolted when he realized that it didn't mean he got to sit around on his **** all day. They'd been going through troubles earlier. He just used it as an excuse to get out of the relationship.

Answer 6

Sounds like to me that he cant handle anything. He doesnt want to stay and be with the kids nor does he want to get a job. He may also be feeling like a loser because you are the bread winner...and he feels like he dont contribute,,,so what a man does best to avoid any situation is run away.

Answer 7

Parenting is extremely stressful, and times three is not for everyone, specifically not for your husband, however, with little detail I would say he stresses pretty easily....since one doesn't walk away from an obstacle, one should figure away thru, around, to over come it...and he ups and quits his job! That's ridiculous for a provider of a family. I am surprised if he isn't living with his mother now....can't say much more than he isn't much of a man to have walked away from his family.

Answer 8

He probably felt stripped of his manhood by being a "wife" at home, and being told that you make more money than him anyway. So that's basically saying he's a pansy. It doesn't sound like you really need him if you're working, making the money, and agreeing to "watch" your child for him.
Marriage counseling?

Answer 9

To me it sounds like he's having major issues? Do you think he's seeing someone else? Where would he move to if he doesn't have a job?

Answer 10

Tonks and Percy (so lovable) Me and voldemort (with a moustache) - we comprehend one yet another o.k. and we provide one yet another a good form of area. we are even enable to this element persons jointly as we are jointly.