Help Please, She is gonna hurt herself?

Question

How many can help? Please?
My best girl friend, is bulimic.... How to i go about approaching her and talking about it. She is not fat but she thinks she is. I don't want anything bad to happen to her, I kind of like her. I would do anything if it would make her stop.

I can't go to her family, because her brothers and dad are always calling her, her sister, and her mom fat a**, her mom basically starves herself, and her sister is bulimic too...

Please help, I don't want her to get hurt.... I love her, too much and would feel responsible if something happened. She passed out not too long ago....

Please help!!! I'm begging

Answer 1

1. Set a time to talk. Set aside a time to talk privately with your friend. Make sure you talk in a quiet place where you won't be distracted.
2. Tell your friend about your concerns. Be honest. Tell your friend about your worries about her or his not eating or over exercising. Tell your friend you are concerned and that you think these things may be a sign of a problem that needs professional help.
3. Ask your friend to talk to a professional. Your friend can talk to a counselor or doctor who knows about eating issues. Offer to help your friend find a counselor or doctor and make an appointment, and offer to go with her or him to the appointment.
4. Avoid conflicts. If your friend won't admit that she or he has a problem, don't push. Be sure to tell your friend you are always there to listen if he or she wants to talk.
5. Don't place shame, blame, or guilt on your friend. Don't say, "You just need to eat." Instead, say things like, "I'm concerned about you because you won't eat breakfast or lunch." Or, "It makes me afraid to hear you throwing up."
6. Don't give simple solutions. Don't say, "If you'd just stop, then things would be fine!"
7. Let your friend know that you will always be there no matter what.

Answer 2

I suffered with that for many years. It was awful. It was also a cry for help and to feel wanted. From the sound of it, she is not getting that at home, and I do know what that is like too.

Unfortunately, all you can do is talk to her, let her know you care and you worry about her. She will then have to make the choice to do something about it. People who suffer from such strong addictions or compulsions, truly need to reach bottom sometimes untilt they finally choose to change. I assure you, she will also need qualified counseling from someone experienced in eating disorders.

Most of all, I would not judge or condemn her in any way. She is doing plenty of that on her own. Many times when people are hurting, they really don't even need answers, they just need someone to really listen to them. Many times they also fear abandonment and the food is a way of dealing with the body's quest for satisfaction in some way. Bulimia is very tough because they already feel out of control so they eat and purge in order to have some control over thier bodies. Most of them also hate themsleves, yes, like her, think that they are fat and unlovable too.

Just be the caring friend that you sound like you are. Let her know you will be there for her. There is also a great book by Stormie O'Martien about her struggles with it. I highly recommend that you get that for her. See if she will consider counseling too and maybe try and find a good one to start with. Don't force her, it's her decision. Just love and care for her. Let her know you think she is a beautiful person. It may take years, but this is a good start. I wish you the best.

Answer 3

Take her to the doctor! It is extremely IMPORTANT that she does! While you two are going to the doc, gently hug her and tell her that you love her very much and you would not want to see her continuing hurting herself like this. Tell her that she is beautiful the way she is, and to not listen to people who tell her otherwise. You do not want her to hear words that will reinforce her thoughts that what she is doing is right. As for her brothers and dad, how rude! How can they treat the women in the family like that? Why? How can they do that? I see that she is living in a stressful and unhealthy environment. Ask her mom if she can stay with you just for a few days. Talk to her mom and her sister that they are all beautiful and that they are not fat. If it gets worse, well I suggest they go to a family counselor. Good luck I hope it goes well!

Answer 4

Wow! You are really up against it because her whole family is dysfunctional. Her dad and brothers are being abusive. Her mother seems to be unable of doing her job, which is to protect her children. This whole family needs an intervention.

You need to tell your friend that she's okay and her family is weird. She'll probably agree with you on that! Point out that it's weird for her dad to say mean things to his family members. Maybe that's how he keeps control over them, by making them feel bad? The brothers have probably learned to be mean from their dad. Tell her she's fine and you're afraid for her and don't like to see her being put down. Encourage her to talk to the school counselor about it, or some other adult who can be trusted. Even if her family continues to be messed up, maybe she can get some help to save herself.

You're a really good friend :-)

Answer 5

well what u can do is take her to a doctor all by ur selfs cause that is bad and she is gonna die if she keeps doing that and thats nobody's fault it is a serious problem.i tell u because one of my ex-best friends was bulimic too and she died like 2 months ago.Now her parents feel guilty about her death.I didn't do anything to help her but i know that it wasn't my fault so i don't feel like that.I got tired of telling her to go see a doctor but she said that she was fat and everything.But she was fine when i first met her but she had a boyfriend and he broke with her because he told her that she was fat so then that's were everything started.There was this time that she was a bone! really a bone!but she still said that she was fat and ended up dying.

Answer 6

I am NOT a doctor, but I want to go to college in Pensylvania for a veteraniarian. But anyway, I don't know what to say, this is a hard situation to be in for you. Will, Intervention help maybe? Go to a therapist.
But the only true way for you to help is give her encouragement and care, and support, that is a serious thing, just talk to her and sit her down with a true, true to the heart talk, and she what she has to say. I am sorry, and I really wish I could help, but sadly, I am only a yahoo member that trys to help people. I am not a doctor, a therapists. Neither

I am REALLY sorry. I hope she stops being belimic. It's so sad....
Sorry....

I am praying for you...and your true best friend...always...

Answer 7

I would check with some medical people,even your Doctor for some org.that might be able totell you the proper steps to help her,I would try to get her away from those creep brothers and so called dad of hers,someone needs to have a long talk with them with a Base ball Bat,that's not how you treat someone that your supposed to love including their mother,they're what you call white trash!!!(good luck)

Answer 8

this sounds so mean but dont get her help.. she will hate you forever.. i have been down that road... you have to be so there for her and if you like her tell her so that something new will be going on in her life and she doesn't have to worry about being "fat"..... tell her you love here and nothing would hurt you more than her hurting herself... but w/e you do dont get her help!!! you be her help! support her and be there for her..slowly bring it on her that she could really hurt herself! and if she doesn't care about dying or hurting herself (which i didn't when i was doing it ) then just try to do alot with her that would help take stuff like that off her mind... tell her you think she is beautiful and just basically be there for ..SHE NEEDS YOU NOW!!!!

Answer 9

I don't know how old she is, but she needs to be removed from the house. Her kin need counsoling just as much as she does. Keep reinforcing to her how good she looks and that you admire her figure and wish yours could be more like hers. In the meantime, have her make an appointment with a professional to talk to her AND her family. They don't realize they are the driving force behind her self-destruction. They are ignorant as hell!

Answer 10

If I were you I would keep talking to her and make her feel better! Then, I would ask her out! I would tell her she is not fat and she needs to get some help!Try your best! I wouldn't stress over it to much because you could talk yourself into killing yourself and then your friends and family would miss you very much!You would hurt their fillings!