me and my hubby having problems?

Question

i really truly hate myspace. (sorry for the fans out there) anywho i think that it ruins relationships with their significant other, i dont know thats my opinion, but thats not the case. to make along story short.me and my hubby have been to gether for 3 yrs and this has been happening since i got my computer. he started hiding everything from me, password,emails, and his stupid cellphone (guards with his life). he has all these half nakey girls on his page but im not featured anywhere on his page, and it said single on it, so am i overreacting when i see these things? its hurts me and i told him i have a major problem with it. i feel as though he is not hearing me. he says he trusts me. its not about the trust its just the fact that he is labeled as single or in a relationship. he doesnt want to take pics with me so we can at least post them. i asked him does he really wannabe with me and he says yes and shows alot of affection, but whats wrong? tell me something men?? and ladies 2

Answer 1

He is abusing your trust.

I would sit him and down and say, "Look. You have 60 minutes to take pictures of me alone and us together, post them on MySpace as my wife and us a married couple, change your status to married, and give me all your passwords to all your accounts or I am filing for divorce. You are using the computer to look for a mistress, and to completely disrespect me by being too ashamed of me to even mention me as your wife or show a photo of me, your wife, to the world. This is what is happening whether you say so or not, and I will not tolerate being treated that way so either you change how you are living or I will change how I am living. "

"Oh and by the way we are downloading and installing a piece of keylogging software (Google it) that will track every conversation you have with women so I can rest assured you do not use at least this computer to continue your disrespectful actions. That will be one password *I* have that you won't. And in time if I start to trust you again and feel like your actions, not your words, tell me you respect me again, we can move forward. As for now, I am very distrustful of your intentions -- as you would be if I was out on the Internet advertising myself as single and chatting up a ton of guys-- and you have to *earn* every inch of trust back again by continued steady behavior. It's time you confronted this terrible behavior. That's the deal - TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT."


Then be ready to file since most people hooked on that sh*t rarely change until it is WAY too late.

Answer 2

I know how you feel about myspace. When my husband and I started our accounts we gave each other our passwords. I didn't want something as stupid as myspace causing a problem in our relationship. So far so good. He got a little irritated that one of my ex boyfriends form years ago was trying to contact me. I just told my ex that I am married now, and I don't really have anything to say to him. Problem solved.

With things like these, along with cell phones, it needs to be open and honest. Your husband is neither. I would put a parental block on his myspace account, (yes you can do this) or I would cancel the Internet. Do you really need it. It's fine and good that he trusts you, you aren't doing anything wrong. You need to ask yourself, do you trust him? Do you think he is up to no good?

Answer 3

Well you cant blame myspace for ruining relationships. Blame the man login on and being sneaky. I honestly believe myspace is a better way to catch up your man. You are seeing his true colors. If your his girl...then you should be rep on his page...if ur not...then why are you with him? Why is he denying a relationship. What people do on myspace, is exactly what they do on the streets. So if he is denying he is in a relationship on myspace, just imagine what he would do if he was at a club or something. Myspace is just giving you the opp to see it for yourself. Don't be a fool, if he is doing nothing wrong, then he has nothing to hide. (emails, passwords, cell phones, whatever) Don't be naive girl. It is what is it. Don't blame no one but him. He sounds like a dog, if you ask me. My man cant hide his phone and all that from me, and we both have a myspace page and we both have each others passwords and stuff. I would move on if I were you... (or tell him to delete his profile)

Answer 4

I agree that myspace causes many problems. Me and my husband had a very short stent with myspace and both ended up deleting our accounts. Three of my friends have found their significant others listed as single on myspace and they were not told about the accounts. Too many problems. It's great for singles, don't get me wrong there.

Anyway, I don't think you are overreacting. He is wrong to not include you completely. Tell him the proctologist called. They found his head.

Answer 5

well he is definitely up to something that does not involve you, which is very wrong in marriage, if a marrage is to work as it should, nothing must be ignored by one towards the other for starters. i am a married man and have a pc and could be doing and going all over the net, but to be honest i have such a level of love for my wife, i could not live with the guilt of doing so. but your man doesn't seem to mind even though you told him how much it hurts you, in my opinion a man would not do what he is doing to you unless he has found something better,,,, sort it out fast or your life will become a living hell
i am sorry , Brian

Answer 6

Frist of all...yeah myspace does ruin some relationships...the only way it won't is if there is honesty involved. He is lying to you as well as the friends he has..Posting that he is single is a no, no...He should also include you as a friend so that everyone knows who you are..The nude woman thing...yeah there are alot of woman on myspace who are either exhibitonist and get a thrill out of people seeing them nude OR they are a porn service..click on the page you will normally find a link to a porn page...

You my dear are not over-reacting one bit..him hiding things from you and him gaurding the cell phone are big indicators that he is up to no good..

Answer 7

This doesn't mean he's cheating, but he could be trying to hook up with somebody by stating on his profile that he is single. I'm sorry, but no married man or woman should have a myspace account. Grow up! I'm 23, married, but do I have one? No! It's for junior high kids! If he won't get rid of his account, then compromise with him, tell him you want a picture of you and him on there, his status changed to married, and that he get rid of all the whores on his page. I do think that your husband is entitled to privacy though. I don't give my husband my passwords, or cell phone, but if he wants to look at them, he can ask. If he does, then he gets to look, I have nothing to hide. My best advice, quit nagging him about it, sit down and talk to him about it. Men don't hear nagging. You're not overreacting, myspace is famous for whores trying to hook up with guys and vice versa. It's a stupid, childish site. Email me if you need to. Good luck!

Answer 8

You aren't the first person I've heard of whose husband did that, I've known a few girls that happened to. But it's not My Space's fault, it's your husband's. He chose do get on and do those things. If it were my husband I'd give him an ultimatum, to either take off the stuff that doesn't show he's proudly married, or you'll leave him. He might not be cheating, some people live in a fantasy world on there. But I know a couple of guys who have it proudly displayed on their pages that they are married.

Answer 9

I have been married for 18 years. If I ever saw a page that said my husband was single with half naked girls on it, I would make sure his wishes were granted. One of us would be gone. Me or the page. It is disrespectful, distrustful, and distasteful for any married man to represent himself as anything else. If he's not looking for another single, then he wouldn't be representing himself that way to other singles. I would give him an ultimatum......Me or the secrets. He could keep whichever meant the most to him. Not both. Good luck and listen to your gut........If it says somethings wrong, usually it is. P. S. Get rid of the computer!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 10

for a guy, it's nice to feel like you still have choices even though you don't. it's a mental freedoom. like if I wanted some of that, I could have it. not that he necessarily wants it, it just he has the freedom if he did, the tighter you tie the noose, the more trapped he will feel and the quicker you are to going your seperate ways. play his game and see if he likes it. don't keep bytching. start your own myspace and lock your cell phone, go down and get you a prepaid with a number he doesn't know about, dial your cell with it, your house phone, and when he ask , it's just someone who keeps bothering you or you don't know, be sure to turn the ringer off the prepaid. you can get one for 20 bucks that you can use for 3 months to drive him nutty. pretty cheap for some fun.