Wife had a affair for 18 months said she only had sex 6 times?

Question

DO YOU BELIVE HER. And if so why or why not

Answer 1

That is horrible. I would personally pack her stuff and tell her to get out. It doesn't matter how many times. She apparently doe not have a conscience. You deserve better.

Answer 2

If she was having an affair because she was sexually frustrated then I couldn't believe that six times was enough for her. If the affair was because she was emotionally frustrated and she felt that she needed validation as a women then six times is probably six times more than she needed.
I think the reality is that she felt that she was not fully appreciated as a woman and wanted validation of that fact from someone. She couldn't get that validation from you so she found it elsewhere. The sex was just a price that she was prepared to pay at that time for the validation. If she didn't have to pay with sex she wouldn't have bothered because the sex isn't what she wanted or needed. If she only had to pay six times in 18 months to get the validation she wanted that would be all she would pay.
Perfectly believable in that light I think.

Answer 3

Maybe they could only manage to get together six times over 18 months. What difference does it make how many times they had sex anyway? She had the affair whether it was once or 100 times. Does your forgiveness depend on the number of times they had sex?

Answer 4

Puh-leeeeze.

6 times in one session, maybe.

I can hear her now, "Honey, I had an affair for 18 months,and we only had sex once every 3 months. You know, like you and I do. That's why I had an affair - so I could have rare, intermittent, boring sex just like in my marriage.

The other 89 days we got together every three months, we worked on opening chess strategies. And sex - when we did it which was rare, mind you - was sooooo boring. He was a lousy lay - it only took me 18 months of sneaking around with his dick and tongue in me to figure that out."

She's trying to buffalo you to avoid more guilt, shame, and having to own up to being a sneaky horny f*ckaholic whore. Don't believe it for a second. Tell her it's time to stop lying so you can get to know the real her (before you dump her a*ss -- don't tell her that part - see how she likes secrets!).

Answer 5

No, I wouldn't believe that an affair that lasted that long only had 6 sexual encounters.

Why? Because the entire basis of an affair is sex. That's it.

Answer 6

I wouldn't believe her....but why do you want to know how many times she has had sex with another. Sex is sex, nothing less nothing more. If she has had an affair on you, do you really think she is wife material, if she can't even keep it in the relationship.

Answer 7

An affair can be more than sex.

The question is: Do YOU believe her?

Don't let people influence your decision on what you think of your wife. It's betwen you and her. Was the marriage lacking? Does she still want to even be with you? Is that why she had an affair? Questions and more questions that you should ask HER.

Answer 8

I would believe her. It's possible that the affair was emotional; the intensity of an emotional affair can last with little or no sex.

It doesn't matter if any of us believe her; decide if you're going to work it out with her or end it.

Answer 9

Well, what she did was not right. Lot of people suggested divorcing her. But do you have any kids? Talk to your wife and see if she is willing to change her life style. I am going though something similar now except that my wife says that she didn't have sex but only kissed the guy. She wants to go and marry him. She knows it was a mistake but still cannot control herself. I have two kids and I am really worried about them. But one of these days I might just decide to move on...

Answer 10

I would believe the six times thing. She knows she's been terrible, she knows she has done a horrible thing, she has nothing to gain by saying six times. To say once, fair enough. To say it was one weekend, fair enough. To say, one week, one month, fair enough; it'd be a way of saying she wasn't thinking, it was a spur of th moment thing but that's not what she's doing. It's the eighteen months of lying that's the real issue and she'll know it: to say she had sex at 3 month intervals, or a few times, ended it, then a few more times does not help her case - it shows she wasn't just getting carried away. I'd believe her, it'd be a pointless lie.

Answer 11

Only six times, huh? My god, Man. Six times is six times too many. Why should you believe anything she says at this point? She vowed to be faithful to you, and didn't. I think the mere fact that she said ONLY six times, shows her total disregard to the magnitude of what she did. I would not let it go...that's for sure. A mistake would be once....and even then it's hard to get past, but for a full 18 months? Geez!