what are some good responces to telemarketers?

Question

I swear I get at least 3 calls a day form them and im running a little low on creativity...

Answer 1

wanna have sex? lol then hopefully theyll just hang up

Answer 2

I love when they call! I have so much fun with them! One time they were trying to sell me a new york times paper, and I told the person I don't live in new york, and then they explained to me how you don't have to live in new york, and we were in a convo for a good 10 minutes, and I was finally like, I am interested, only the problem is I am illiterate. It was so funny. Then another time I answered the phone in speaking Spanish, they kept trying to talk to me and I kept responding in spanish, finally they were like I am sorry I will try calling back later and then I go, ok talk to you later man bye! haha I also like to flirt with the guys who call me, I will tell them that they sound sexy and how old are they, etc etc. Then another time some woman called and wanted to know if I wanted digital cable or something for my tv and I told her i needed to ask my hubbie and he wasn't home, and that is never comes home at night anymore and I think he is cheating on me etc etc, she kept calling back the whole week and I kept telling her no, he is still out, he probably won't get home until 3 am. I have so many more stories, but I will probably bore you with them, if I haven't already. I love messing around with them people!

Answer 3

1. Sorry I'll have to call you back, I have a pie in the oven.

2. For the last time, NO! I don't want to attend a conference for a free vacation. I don't have the time.

3. Sorry I'm huh blah... going to have to hang up. I'm sick and I think I may need to throw up now. Bye bye.

4. I'm expecting a call from my unemployment adviser.

5. I'm expecting a call from my ex_______ .

6. Give me your name and number and I'll be sure to call you back when YOU are in the middle of dinner.

7.Sorry I have a bizarre fear of_________.

Answer 4

Mess with them.
-Examples-
"Hello, I was wondering if you were interested in..."
-"ARE YOU CALLING ME GAY?"
-"I was wondering if you were interested in me being able to stick my foot in my mouth?"

"Hello, do you have a few minutes?"
-"That depends, are you going to talk?"-

"Hello, my name is -----, and I was wondering if I could talk with you about -----"
-"Thank you for calling Mikey's Pizzaria, how may I help you?"
-"Congradulations! You've won a trip to Bermuda!"
-"Hello, my name is -----, and I don't give a damn."

It's also a blast to jam loud music into the reciever. Act like you're interested for a few minutes and then turn on a CD right next to the phone. Death metal or punk is always fun...

I don't know what your comfortable saying, so feel free to throw in obcenities wherever you please.

Answer 5

Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY, because you want to write EVERY WORD down.


Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?"


Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask them if they will give you their HOME phone number so you can call them back. When the telemarketer explains that they cannot give out their HOME number, you say "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The telemarketer will agree and you say, "Now you know how I feel!"


After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.


Tell the telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and ask if they could bring you a case of beer and some chips.


If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.


If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends... would you be my friend?"


Cry out in surprise, "Judy! Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of pause as she tries to figure out where the hell she could know you from.


If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.


When they ask "How are you today?" Tell them! "I'm so glad you asked because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died..."

Answer 6

I'm definitely interested in the product, but don't particularly like you. Could you transfer me to someone who is less of a jerk so that they get the commission instead of you?


I also find it fun to bargain. Let them explain their offer, and then provide a counter offer.
Them- You can get 12 months of some stupid magazine for 19.95 a month!
Me- I want 90 months at $1/yr

Answer 7

I had this guy call me and try to sell magazines I told that i could not read and he's like mam you have to no how to read and I'm like no i don't and he says somebody in your house has to read and i stuck to my story we talked for about 30 minutes and by the end of the call he was laughing so hard because he said nobody else had ever stuck to their story like i did

Answer 8

im sorry i cant take your call right now, how about you give me your home/cell number and ill call you back when i can

excuse me, but do you like people calling you during dinner . . . . ( they will probably say no ) this is where you respond me either so dont call here again . . . and slam the phone down . . . you can subsitiute dinner with any activity your doig currently

Answer 9

Use the Moe the Bartender approach from the Simpsons. Say that you will cut the top of their head off and paint your house with their brains.

Answer 10

All you have to do is pick up the phone and say "shut up" and then I just hang up.
I never really get calls from the same number.
If your phone doesn't show the caller ID, then just pick it up, listen to what they have to say, and if it's telemarketers, tell them to "shut up" and hang up.

Answer 11

Tell them you are busy at the moment but if they can give you there home phone number you will call them during their dinner and they can chat all they want about whatever it is they are trying to sell...

(Jerry Seinfeld)