What should I do about a bully on my son's bus?

Question

My son is 12, 5'4", 150lbs and in 6th grade. There's some kids on his bus that get on/off on his same stop (which just so happens to be right outside our house) that keep messing with him (verbally, spraying liquid on him, and pushing). I want to go find them and beat the ever loving s*%t out of their parents for raising such brats. My son is in advanced classes, quiet and doesn't speak up for himself. I'm not sure what to do or what to tell him to do because these kids know where he lives. He never goes outside to play and now I'm realizing its probably because he doesn't want to run into them. I'm not sure what to do short of enrolling him in self defense classes, but they're too expensive. My husband's response is "He's a boy, getting into fights and sometimes getting beat up is just a right of passage." Any advice? Anybody? Please!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 1

I'm surprised you haven't considered reporting the behavior to the school - even if it isn't a school bus or on school grounds and isn't necessarily the school's responsibility, they still need to know which students are bullies and which are victims.
See if you can find out the names of at least a few of the boys, and then call the school and talk to their teacher or a dean or principal. They can then talk to the parents of the bullies, and devise an effective solution (since any direct interaction between you and their parents would involve a lot of blame and name-calling and possibly violence, and not conflict resolution).
You can also call the police, and ask their advice. They may have a "school relations officer" or youth division that focuses on these types of bullying cases, and the simple presence of a uniform near the bus stop on random afternoons may discourage their behavior.

Self-defense classes would be a terrific investment in your son's health and emotional development. It's not about learning to fight back - it's about building enough confidence to not need to, enough for other people to subconsciously recognize and respect. Please consider enrolling him in a basic and affordable community-center class until you can afford classes at a real dojo. Or go to the dojo and talk with the instructor, and see if there are any "financial hardship" discounts or financing options available, or if you could do work (stuffing envelopes, mopping floors) in exchange for free lessons.

Answer 2

You need to speak to the principal and the school bus driver. The driver should report these kids to the school. Being bullied is not a right of passage. It can leave permanent emotional scars. If the principal refuses to take action, tell him you will take it as far as you have to including a lawsuit.

Answer 3

Hello,
Gee- I too hate this kind of stuff and did happen to one of my sons for the longest. And what I'm afraid of if not taking up promptly with the school board or police, your son may just flip and do something right out of his hands! (Like mine did)
You need to first go to the Principal of the school, parents of these bullies and last temp go to the police and file a complaint on your your son's behalf. Don't BREAK DOWN, JUST DO IT. Before one get hurt or your son loses it. Because right now without you knowing it your son could just be a walking time bomb. Like my quite son was, never bothered a soul, always to himself, when these 4 boys, kicked, snouted, beat him up then urinated on him. FOR NO CAUSE AT ALL. Some on daily basics.
I pressed charges to only find two of the boys, well knowing to police has been up on rape charges, another one theft & robbery to an elderly lady.THESE BULLIES WERE ONLY IN GRADE 8!!! Couldn't believe this.
So as one parent to another, Don't ever let it get this far. Do what a good parent does, Stand up and don't back down.
Good luck and your son must be so proud to have such caring parent.
You guys will get passed this as we did in due time.
Edit: Sorry I forgot to add- Did you know the School could be held accountable if not looked after when you told them? They have insurance on each student and your child is ensuraned to and back home from school. EVEN ON THAT BUS OR BUS STOP!! So push come to shove, nail the school board too.
Then watch them move on it. (A police officer told me," If You complaint to school didn't help maybe a law suit to school would?")

Answer 4

Tell the principal (and the bus driver - if it happens on the bus).

I had a similar situation in 3rd grade. The principal got informed immediately and the bully (1 year older than I was) got an expulsion threat. The school district almost got sued by my parents. That put an end to that guy's bullying.

Answer 5

Call the school. Before a child makes it to there house the school is responsible for there behavior if you haven't tried to bring the behavior up to there parents with no response. Ask your school to have a meeting with parents attending and the children about bullying and correct behavior. Ours did but they also handle the problems verry quickly so it doesn't get out of hand. Also sense it is in front of your house stand up for your kid tell them to knock it off. Teach your son to stand up for himself verbally and if that don't work to follow the rules of society report to school and cops let him know he doesn't have to put up with it. Till your husband to wake up and pay attention to our children with society and the way things are happening with our children. If you don't teach him how to deal with it you may not like his response.

Answer 6

SELF DEFENCE. i would suggest an art that doesnt require much force but can still bring an opponent down such as some forms of karate. you could also follow the bullys home and talk/beat the $#!7 out of the parents. or.......... catch a video of the bullys picking on your child at the bus stop and show it to school officials and that could get the @$$es in serious trouble. If the school officials wont do any thing. and there are some in some schools that wont :( dont hesitate to bring it to court.

Answer 7

Go to the school and complain. Bullying should not be tolerated and if it's happening on the bus, the bullies can be thrown off the bus permanently.

Answer 8

Yes, have him kick him in the balls and when he falls down, kick him in the head. I went through this as a kid I was 5'2'' and a 100lbs wet. The kid that picked on me was 6'1'' and weighed over 200 lbs. This is how I handled it and he became my best friend all the way through junior and high school. Your husband is right he cannot go though life letting people push him around. The worst thing that can happen is that he can get his butt whooped, but he will get over it, and others will realize that he is not got to put up with that kinda of behavior.

Answer 9

Go to the school immediately and speak with the principal. Your son needs protection for these bullies. Bullying is against the law and against most school system policies.

Tell the principal that you want it to stop and you want no repercussions from those brats against your son. If that doesn't work, then go to the police with the boys names and let them handle it.

Your son doesn't need self-defense classes; he needs parents that will stand up for him and put an end to it.

Answer 10

Tell the bus driver. He/She should have seen this activity and should have stopped it!! If that doesnt work tell the principal.