How do you get your self esteem up so it doesn't effect your marriage?

Question

I have a low self esteem and I am really jealous I always worry about my husband and other women but he is right we have a really awesome love life and we have so much fun together. i am worried because i don't want him to find anything better and to me everything is better. I need to really boost my self esteem before it kills my marriage i love my husband and trust him help me

Answer 1

You need counseling. It's not a bad thing, it'll make you feel better.
You may even want to talk to your doctor about antidepressants. Even taken short-term, they can have a huge impact on your life!

Answer 2

yeah... self esteem is a huge deal. and it really affects all aspects of ur life.. friends, family, job, etc etc.. it is a worthwhile thing to work on :). so good for you for acknowledging, and accepting something that u need to keep improving on~

my advice would be to take care of urself physically, mentally and emotionally:

1) Exercise - work out. the better you look , the better u feel, the more confidence u gain. i'm not kidding..when you feel you look pretty, you FEEL happier and more confident. it's a crazy phenomenon.

2) Study - if you are in school, study hard. learn as much as u can. keep an open mind. find out what u are good at, and what u are interested in. if you are working, then do ur BEST to learn all u can about the business. be a good worker. read more, follow the news, discuss w/ others. the more u KNOW, the easier it will be for you to be Confident in your smarts.

3) Relationships - start with your immediate family. practice on ur friends, family, husband, kids. try to be more Open. speak more. listen more. let people know u are trying to expand your horizons, and constantly seek positive traits that you have, that others have, and what you want. u can learn a lot from people in your life. slowly, practice speaking w/ people outside of ur close circle.. friends of friends, strangers at the bus stop, parent/teacher day, etc. *REMEMBER: u are exercising, and learning more, so u have less to be "shy" about, and more to be Confident about!

eventually you will realize that ur fears about yourself are getting smaller, and u will see how much Potential u have. remember to always keep an open mind and stay Positive..that way, no matter how Beautiful, Smart, and Friendly u get, u will never think urself better than others, and u will keep that humbleness that u have right now :).

and you will be proud of yourself for changing for the Better and improving your lifestyle, which affects ur husband, and everyone around you!! good luck ~ :)

Answer 3

I can understand your insecurity. I have low self-esteem too. My husband on occasion comments on another woman and makes me feel really weird. The problem that I was having with my self esteem was looking for it through him. Meaning, I needed his attention and compliments to boost me up. He is not that way. I needed to find a way to boost myself up and love myself. The sad reality is there is always gonna be something better (i know this). Theres always something better whether it be food, clothes, better hair and what not. Dont put yourself in a place that you are not something special. Because you are and could be the reason why your husband married YOU. If you love your husband and you have trust in him dont leave any room for distrust. No room at all. You can boost your self-esteem by doing something for yourself and treating yourself...look for a new outfit or get your hair done and feel good. I urge you not to put your self-esteem through him because imagine if something bad (god forbid) were to happen really imagine how you would feel then. Always feel good for you trust me he will see your confidence. When you have great self-esteem and always holding your head up nothing can bring you down. NOTHING. Enjoy having fun with your husband and enjoy your life. Remember he married YOU. He saw a light in you. Keep shining it. Good luck :)

Answer 4

If you trust him you shouldn't feel this way. Low self esteem is a major turn off to men. Have you ever met a not so attractive woman but all the guys seem to love her and you just don't see why? Well it's because she is confident in herself and that is very attractive. Just be happy with yourself and make a few changes if you feel it will help you. He should love you for who you are! Good luck!

Answer 5

First off, you have to learn how to TRUST. You married your husband. He married you.

You say you trust him, but you really don't seem to have that trust. If you are constantly worried that he's going to leave you, that's not trust.

I suggest going to a professional. These feelings are rooted so deeply in you that a professional is REALLY going to be the person you need to speak with.

Answer 6

I would suggest seeking couseling that would help loads or even hypnotherapy..
I use to have a bad problem with self esteem as well, I started to see a hypnotherapist and it helps all kinds. Other than that i don't know what you could do...

Answer 7

you need to trust your husband but if hes a flirting husband you got every right to be jealous i don't think a married man should stare at other women's hind ends like my husband use to he'd laugh then we would argue he would say i was accusing him

Answer 8

You need to see a counselor...it works...also if you husband tells you all the time that your beautiful and he loves you that will help too.

Answer 9

Flirt with other men. They will let you know just how "hot" you are. Since you don't believe your husband.

Answer 10

Therapy and Drugs. Seriously.