I have this friend that has confessed to me many times he loves me...a lot. I really dont know what to do in that situation. He told me its ok that we're friends, and it doesnt have to go any further if I dont want, but, i feel it hurts him more. I feel uneasy knowing that.
I do talk to him as friends, and he knows i have no further feelings for him, but i still cant help to feel bad in my part. What do you suggest?
2007-03-20 06:43:59 · 22 answers · asked by CM 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
...and he knows i dont love him that way.
2007-03-20 06:51:03 · update #1
Just be a friend and DON'T GIVE MIXED SIGNALS! Always treat him the same as you'd treat a female friend (assuming you're not bi) and don't touch him or do stuff that he could misconstrue as "coming on to him" or anything like that. Eventually, he'll see it's hopeless.
2007-03-20 06:47:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 1⤋
The best gift my first break-up gave me was ruthless bluntness and an extreme broken heart.
The poor man had to basically beat me over the head with cruel words & actions until I could love no more (like clubbing a baby seal). I'm psycho that way ... but never again did I ever beg anyone again. I'm still a hopeless romantic, but at least I can stop hoping at the first sign that the man's got no interest, and this has saved me extreem. So, I have to thank my first break up for being a jerk.
2007-03-20 14:28:15 · answer #2 · answered by Giggly Giraffe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends if the person is understanding or not. If its a guy, don't feel bad. He'll get over it. Try not spending too much time with him, that will give him too much hope that something might develop. The other option is completely cutting off the relationship. What are you willing to do for the better benefit for the both of you? If he feels that there might be a possibility for the two of you, he will never go out to search for another love.
2007-03-20 13:55:46 · answer #3 · answered by Ray E 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
See, this is a very complicated situation. I thougholy uderstand what you are going through I think Except the opposite. I told one of my old friends a while back how i felt for him and he said that he only sees me as a friend. At first, i just said that thats okay but i did feel hurt. But,Eventuall i leanred to deal with it and now we aren't as close as we used to be but we are still friends. I say dont worry about it eventually he will become used to the fact that you too are just friends......
good luck hun
2007-03-20 13:49:02 · answer #4 · answered by shannon b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My answer is going to be the hardest one for both you and he but (in my opinion) the healthiest one. Distance will fade those feelings and force him to spend his time around, and meet, other women. If you talk everyday - talk once every three days. If you see each other once a week, see each other bi-weekly.
In situations like this absence does not make the heart grow fonder. It lets the heart go.
2007-03-28 12:03:17 · answer #5 · answered by |sojourn| 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if there is absolutely no way that you could ever love him that way ( and i mean sometimes love does develop over time) then make sure that you don't send any signals to him that you might be interested in him. also you can let him know if you are dating someone else, but i would spare him the details. i'd like to say that eventually he will get over you, but that might not happen as long as you are friends. if all else fails, and this is really sucky, you might have to distance yourself from him to spare his feelings. good luck !
2007-03-24 20:09:12 · answer #6 · answered by Jay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really can't do anything. He has to mature and see that the feeling is not mutual, and that he cannot force you to feel. He has to see his feelings as selfish because they only serve him at that point. The best thing is for everyone to accept the truth and grow from it, even if it's a bit painful.
2007-03-20 13:51:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have been in this exact situation and to be honest there really is no way to change someone's feelings about u. if they like u and u dont just leave it at that. just be nice to them and maybe one day he will finally find someone else that he really loves and u can find someone u love too. hope it all works out for the best!!
2007-03-20 13:48:25 · answer #8 · answered by blondie62193 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop talking to him cause he seems to think or hope one day you will feel more for him cut him off slowly unless you are just playing games with him by leading him on. Tell him you don't love him and you never will and you don't want to here him say it to you again
2007-03-20 13:50:02 · answer #9 · answered by keena 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He already knows where he stands.So dont feel he expects anything of you. He is nIce He loves you so much he is willing to see you happy even if its not with him. Or maybe time will tell and he will win your heart ... It could happen... the future is unforseen.
2007-03-28 13:44:37 · answer #10 · answered by *^^* 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋