I found out I was pregnant about 2 weeks ago...So I'm about 1 month. My husband and I have our problems but were working at it, with marriage counseling, and meds for my bi-polar. ( I can't take anymore) Now my husband is being all controlling yelling at me saying I'm just crazy, and a *****, etc. I tried to tell him he is the one acting crazy...screaming at me and over stupid stuff. Our marriage counseling is to help talking and he just say get out of my face. Last night I couldn't take it I had to leave and stay at my moms.
My friend told me that because he can't control what is going on that he is going to try to control me.
He also said if I leave him that he will take the baby away from me.
I just dont know what to do.I think he is flipping out.What can I do? I'm going to stay at my moms this week, but I dont want this to continue.
He just keeps bringing up that I'm crazy and forget what I do. I remember everything I do and say, and from the looks of it that he is going nuts.
2007-03-20 06:29:36 · 11 answers · asked by ERICKSMAMA 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The truth is probably that you BOTH are acting crazy. Right?
Anyway, since you only have control over yourself, then get your side of the equation under control.
When he starts yelling and telling you that you are crazy, be truthful and say that yes, sometimes you are crazy, and it is at those times that you need him to be sane and calm.
It is entirely possible that he does feel things are out of control, so it seems he is trying to control you.
He may just want to know what is going on. Not everyone likes a random life. So if you are in the habit of doing things "spur of the moment" or without discussion or warning, then you could be feeding his fears.
Or he could just be a control freak. We really cannot tell from a one-sided account.
What I do know is that you (and he) can only control your own actions. I know that it's not a good idea to both be "crazy" at the same time. So if you see he is already crazy, you have to be the sane one for a moment.
Likewise, if he sees you are crazy, then he needs to ensure that he is responding in a sane fashion, as the sane one during those times.
See if you can get him to read this as well and to buy into the notion of only one crazy at a time.
2007-03-20 06:49:21 · answer #1 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
while the counseling may help...you may also want to seek out the below website for further assistance. and reconsider keeping that baby of yours...with bipolar. i'm not trying to be mean here...but just keep your options open. i think that you leaving was the best thing that you could have done for yourself. make sure that you STAY AWAY. your husband needs to understand that his behaviour is not acceptable. while i understand that we all go through bad times...taking it out on someone else who is totally innocent is not acceptable...period. he can either get help...or get the divorce. because no relationship is not worth you going through verbal (and possible physical abuse) just to say you have a marraiage and a man that you love. if you don't have a job..get one. you need to have your own source of income. what ever he throws at you is designed to CONTROL you, your actions, your behaviour, and your emotions. seek out the below website, and seek out an attorney. he may need to lose everything before he changes for the better. besides...he may have gotten you pregnant to keep you limited in what you can do and where you can go...another form of control. which is why i said to reconsider keeping the fetus.
2007-03-20 13:37:46 · answer #2 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound more nuts that he does. If you are bi-polar then you will continue to feed the fire and continue to seek comfort in the drama and the confrontation.
Take your meds and go to counselling. Think about the baby's well being. Do you think that is fair for a child to leave in the house of hell?
The question here is not how to handle your husband, but rather how your husband could possibly handle you.
Get a grip of yoru self and good luck
2007-03-20 13:34:31 · answer #3 · answered by Blunt 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Fisrt off, don't believe that crap about him taking your baby. He is just trying to intimidate you. It sounds as though he may be abusive. Does he hit you or tell you that your are stupid, fat, lazy, etc.? If he is abusive don't expect it to get better and marriage counseling is not a good idea.
If he is not abusive, he may be having a difficult time adjusting to the idea of becoming a father and having to deal with that additional responsibility.
Take care of yourself and your baby first and make sure you are safe.
2007-03-20 13:42:17 · answer #4 · answered by Rickster 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He either needs to treat you with some respect or you need to leave him. He can't legally take away your child unless you are an unfit parent. You don't need this kind of drama when you are pregnant. The baby feels everything. You need to get some legal advice on this one though.
2007-03-20 13:37:14 · answer #5 · answered by #1 Lucy Fan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep a record of everything, he says, does, times and places, calls recorded them , tell you counseler everything too. make notes and hind them so he can not get them.
Tell him you want to know exactly what he is taling about, what when and where were you being crazy. if he can not then tell him to shut up. and get help.
2007-03-20 13:47:58 · answer #6 · answered by picture 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
doesn't sound like you are crazy to me. he has gone off the deep end. it is a good idea to stay at your mothers for a while. he can't control you if you are not there. let him know that he has to get help before you are willing to go back home. good luck to you and your baby and CONGRATS on your pregnancy.
2007-03-20 13:38:39 · answer #7 · answered by lynnie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tape record what he says and add that to your collection of things for the judge to hear and why you will fight him tooth and nail in court for your baby. Stay away from him, he sounds insane.
2007-03-20 13:43:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You both have SERIOUS ISSUES and need a LOT of HELP. The SAD thing is you are going to bring a child into your mess. POOR CHILD.
2007-03-20 13:59:28 · answer #9 · answered by Monty L 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he doesnt love you. Stay at mom's house.
2007-03-20 13:42:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋