i had a big fight with my parents about my future...
my parents are interested in maybe moving away to america but i am not and i have never been...
i would prefer to stay in england in university seeing as i am fully aware of how systems work, i have grown up here and i feel the part here...i like it here! i dont want to move agen. and i know the universities and how they work etc etc
i said that i wud be willing to stay here on my own in my university if they wud like to move to america and i sed that that is wat i want to do.
they started accusing me of being selfish and not caring or loving them just because i said that i want to stay here while they move away.... they said i obviously dont care about them if i am willing to do this.
i disagree and think that just because i want something different to wat they want doesnt mean i dont care. i love them dearly but they now think that because im willing to seperate from them for uni i dont care about them.
whose in the wrong?
2007-03-20 05:41:23 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
im 17 and will be applying to university within 6 months time, going to uni in about a year and halfs time
2007-03-20 06:24:29 · update #1
The good news is they love you deeply and care about you, the bad news is they love you very deeply and don't want you to grow away from the family......so.....sounds like it is crunch time and someones gotta give......I am a mom of a 21 yr. old and I can see both sides of your prdicament very clearly. (which I understand is of very little help)......
I think that it all solidly rests on what kind of a 17 yr. old you are, if you can handle yourself in terms of making good choices and not messing up then you should be able to follow your plan, but if you are not a very mature 17 yr. old, then my feeling is you need to go with your family, so I guess, in my opinion, it is all up to you.....good luck and at least know that this is the right kind of problem to have.....parents who care perhaps a bit too much are better, much better, than the deal alot of kids get.
2007-03-20 07:27:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't say how old you are, poppet.
Are you already in University, or will be starting soon? If you have already taken, or are ready to take your GCSEs, you are presumably over 16, already a young adult, capable of making your own decision (but I would always council you to make that an INFORMED decision, not just a teenage strop)
If your parents are resorting to emotional blackmail, it suggests they have attachment issues. While some people cling to mother's apron strings, some are tied to them - which is much harder on both parties.
Your parents are understandably worried about you. If they are wanting to move away while you are still young enough to be in compulsory full time education, do you have any other close relatives that you can stay with until you complete your education? Your parents may feel that is more acceptable than living alone or with "untrustworthy" strangers.
My advice is to use the answers on here in a constructive way to put forward your reasons for wanting to stay here. Good luck xxx
2007-03-20 06:14:50 · answer #2 · answered by Nikky H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
go & stay with grandparents or family then..but dont make your parents feel bad for wanting to start a new life..AND..can you afford to stay on here without relying on your parents..great if you can but probably not ? stop being a brat & go to uni in the states...if you havent been you dont know if you will like it or not - and you can always come back after uni and when you are old enough to make life changing decisions..at 17 - you are not!
2007-03-20 07:41:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well dear, I'm facing this type of problem too. I'm 16, living in mauritius and this year I'm gonna take my Cambridge School Certificate Exams, I can't study at my place coz the atmosphere and noise don't suit me. I wanted to go to my cousin's place as it is nearer to my school and there ain't much noise where he lives; but my parents disagreed as they think that I'm not grateful to them, I don't care and love them. I'm a selfish girl.
I talked to them but they didn't listen coz my aunty said that I was a 'wild' kid, I'll never appreciate what they're doing for me. But this is not true.
We all have our own ways of thinking, I think you should talk calmly to your parents and tell them about how you feel. Tell them that it won't be easy for you to get used to a new University. You are the one studying, not them! You only know what's good for you so as to be successful in your studies. I know it won't be easy, but courage is when you know you lost before you begin, but you begin anyway. Tell them to climb into your skin and walk around it. I'm sure they'll understand you. In England the people are much more open than in Mauritius, your parents will surely listen to you. Don't give up before you try, ok?
2007-03-20 06:00:38 · answer #4 · answered by Lady 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you stay here an go to Uni then maybe think about moving to USA? They just dont want to be parted from you, byt they should also consider you in all this
2007-03-20 05:48:25 · answer #5 · answered by cavviecath 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In America, most students live at the University where they go, so why not just tell them you will live and go to school here, then come to them when you graduate. By then, you will be able to decide better and with less arguments.
2007-03-20 05:46:41 · answer #6 · answered by Common Sense 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your parents, but can you blame them? They love you and will miss you terribly.
2007-03-20 05:45:30 · answer #7 · answered by tooyoung2bagrannybabe 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋