What should I do about my friend that wants to know everything that goes on with me but I cant trust her?

Question

Whenever something happens to me she wants to know what is going on with me but I dont want to tell her b/c she always tells everyone else that wants to know or she will just simply tell everyone about all of my problems. I really dont like it when she does it but I also cant tell her about it b/c she will either get mad at me or she wont listen to me.

Answer 1

She wants to have it both ways: be a confidante, and blab.

You could either not tell her things, or try to help her understand about blabbing.

If there are things you know about her, that will help.

Tell her that you don't want to tell her things because she doesn't know how to keep confidences.

"Why should I tell you things when I know you tell everyone else? You either have to stop telling things I don't want told, or I'm not going to tell you confidential things. You have to pick one. Would you want me to tell everyone about ...? Then you need to respect my confidences."

It's not likely to work, in which case, you need to keep things to yourself.

Let her get mad. No one has the right to information about you except your parents (assuming you're under-age). You have the right to keep your own stuff to yourself.

Don't let her guilt you. If she's a real friend, she'll respect your wishes; if she doesn't, let her have friends that like to be blabbed about.

You can either tell her it's none of her business, change the subject, tell her non-Private things, or tell her it's something you don't want everyone to know.

Mostly, I recommend acting like there's nothing to tell.

She doesn't have a right to know, and doesn't deserve the privilege of your telling her things.

Answer 2

Ok, I had a friend like this. There are two ways or maybe a third depending on how mad you are about it, the first, talk around things or give one line answeres, and if that doesn't work, break it down and tell her you don't want to discuss it. If she really gets mad etc...then tell her. Let her know that everytime you talk about things with her, she runs and tells everyone else. Give specifics and information to go with it. She'll either apologize and deal with it or not. The friend I had, I got rid of her because there were too many things wrong with the situation. No regrets =)

Answer 3

Don't play games. Next time she wants to know what's going on, ask her if she really wants to hear it. If she becomes offended, let he know in the past how she hasn't listened or has spread your business. Be specific. Tell her you don't feel comfortable telling her things and won't until she shows that she won't do this anymore. Communication is the key. I think witholding things from her is only going to make her want to hurt you even more. Did you ever consider that maybe she doesn't listen to get back at you? It's an immature thing to do, to be sure, but some people do things like that when they're angry (she may be angry at you for not talking to her so she pretends not to listen...I admit I've done that before...stupid, but a defense mechanism). Anyway, just talk to her. Get your feelings about the situation out there...if she's a friend and you intend on staying friends, it's the healthiest thing to do, in my experience.

Answer 4

Sounds like she is really not your friend at all. If she were she would not tell the things that you tell in confidence. I think that you should just keep things that you don't want told from her and try to distance yourself from her. Or if you really want to get your point across... next time she asks you what is wrong tell her that you have just been hurt by a person who calls herself your friend yet she tells everyone everything that you tell her. If she does not get it at least she will look like the a** that she is when she starts telling everyone. Good luck

Answer 5

LOL! I desire I wouldve seen that at your age yet there is not any longer something you could say or do to alter her concepts. Dont attempt to strengthen up too rapid. i grow to be as quickly as fourteen and that i understand you're in all probability like a canines in warmth right this moment. basically wait until eventually you're sufficiently previous to furnish for your self and not based on your mom to safeguard you. as quickly as you're grown and on your guy or woman Im specific you have each and all of the sleepovers with guy friends which you relatively choose; besides the shown fact that, some might evaluate that form of habit a lil loose.

Answer 6

Well, just tell her the things that you dont care if everyone knows. If she gets mad at you for no ttelling her everything tell her you dont trust her and get new more trustworthy friends.

Answer 7

Well then if u cant trust her and she dosent want to listen then she is not a true friend , you need to tell her how you feel and if she wont still listen just dump her you dont need people like that around you anyway .

Answer 8

talk to her and explain why u can't tell her everything. she deosnt sound like a very good friend. if she were she wouldnt demand of u what she does. sounds like she needs to grow up. but try talking and see if that helps. sometimes it does. keep what u dont want other ppl to know to ur self. u owe her nothing.

Answer 9

she does not sound like much of a friend. Simple solution don't tell her anything, or make something up to tell her. Bigger picture would be don't consider her a friend.

Answer 10

well, a true friend friend will keep stuff confudential when u ask him/her. if she doen't like it went u tell her that she can't talk about it, find urself a better friend.