"Looking" by Mabi David
His eye on the target: an earlobe.
The finger hooks the trigger, dispatch
of instruction and the barrel tips upward
in an arc that will land the man dead.
He will not loosen his grip on his camera,
the finger a steady crook on the shutter.
What has he lost that now steadies him,
that he can whisper Hold still to himself,
or to this man with the gun,
maybe even to his prisoner?
For this prize, that instant when the bullet swifts through the skull,
and he is past afraid, past his terror for himself, the man,
reducing fear to a frown you put on when someone
you once slept with without having to love, died.
This is his favorite photograph:
Eddie Adams' "Street Execution of a Vietcong Prisoner."
Mind-blowing, he repeats each time he looks at it.
A student of the decisive moment:
Pity to be gifted with such instances and to look away.
Even when he slapped her he insisted on eye contact.
This is how you know it is duty.
That time he sat her through two hours of B-horror,
held her knee and she could not move.
He always meant well, believing good did not mean tenderness.
Wrinkled and bent like a broken wing, now in fits he coughs.
He had called her, made her kneel on the floor
where he spat, and asked if there was blood.
How could she move away and be dutiful?
When he dies, she will remember this:
looking at him looking at the photograph,
through Adams to the stunned man,
missing the point of horror and compassion.
2007-03-20
04:47:07
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