How can I find such information? I have been researching, but nothing seems pertinent to this...
2007-03-20 03:49:12 · 4 answers · asked by micolperu317 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't give a rats rear end what sociologists think. Their recommendations have little to do with real life. They are isolated in offices in universities where reality rarely enters the scene. They deal with the theoretical aspect of things and ignore the practical realities.
Here is some of an answer I gave a while ago.
3. Communicate. Sounds silly, but be HONEST. If you are happy, tell him. If you aren't, don't tell him.
If he brings you flowers and you say nothing, don't expect to get them again.
If he burps in your face and you say nothing, expect him to do it again.
4. Trust. Trust each other and be trustworthy. Don't be out to ruin eachother or check up constantly, but also don't behave in ways that encourage suspicion.
5. Love and be lovable. EVERY SINGLE DAY.
6. Don't say anything that you will regret. NEVER say "I hate you" or "I wish I had never married you". No matter HOW angry you are.
7. Don't leave the house in a fight unless there is actual violence.
8. Don't go out socially without your spouse and get drunk.
9. Don't attach yourself emotionally to another man/woman.
10. Don't lie. Don't hide things from your spouse.
11. The marriage is 1ST. Kids are 2ND. The rest of your families are 3rd.
12. Have sex. Often. Even if you are not feeling "warm and fuzzy" and even if you are not getting along well. Be open to new ideas. Once in a while, make it ALL about whatever makes your spouse feel good, taking pleasure only in their pleasure.
13. NEVER use sex as a punishment.
14. It may seem obvious, but never cheat on your spouse. AT ALL. I don't care how drunk you were.
15. If you have single friends who act like tramps, your husband is not going to like you going out partying with them.
Bottom line: Make your husband your top priority and expect him to do the same for you. Always think: what can I do that will make him smile?
Good luck. I wish you the best.
2007-03-20 03:53:41 · answer #1 · answered by Disco Stu 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sociologists study what a society does and don't usually compare the "best" between them. So a sociological study can tell you that in the US about 50% of marriages end in divorce and that is up from 40 years ago. Or that in the Navajo (Southwestern Native American tribe) the husband is traditionally expected to live with the wife's family and her brother will play a large part as male role model to their children. But studies can't tell you if that's a good strategy for you.
What I've found to work best for me and my marriage is this: First, communicate often about everything. Second, expect yourself to carry out activities and use standards that help the relationship rather than hurt it. Third, choose a spouse who is willing to do the first two also.
2007-03-20 13:00:15 · answer #2 · answered by Critter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Socialogists are garbage, they dont care about marriage because they are just looking for ways to blame society for everyones problems and forget to put anything on accountability. As far as a good marriage the most important things are trust, loyalty, communication and love. If you are able to have thos things you will be good to go.
2007-03-20 10:57:29 · answer #3 · answered by John D 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
to me the most important is to laugh and be each others bestfriend
2007-03-21 06:04:22 · answer #4 · answered by JENNIFER H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋