I Finally Got Everything Together To Tell Her I Still Love Her And Want Her But She Tells Me She Basically Had feThis Guy A Couple Of Times He Turned Out To Be A Stalker And She Doesn't Deal With Him Anymore. Even Though We Had Not Been Together How Do I Get Over This? I Really Do Love Her And My Two Kids And This Is Not Just Because I See Her Moving On. I Brought My Love And Feelings To Her Before I Knew About This Other Guy. So What Do I Do? I See Images And Think About What She Did With This Guy Constantly. I Want To Have Our Family Back But She Is Still Hurt By The Past A Bit As I Am and About This New Information. However She Said She Wished I Would Have Showed Her Any Of This Love Or Caring Even A Few Months Ago And This Thing That Is Killing Me Would've Never Happened. She Did Say She Regrets It Now She Knows How I Feel. She said she did like him. However, he wanted more like a relationship and she didn't so she ended it and said he got weird to her please help!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-20 03:02:36 · 23 answers · asked by loongleever73 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you can't let go of the past you will have no future. You guys weren't together so she was free at the time. And she didn't want a relationship with this guy possibly because she still loves you but whatever has happened to both of you in the past year has to be water under the bridge. If you don't really let it go, be dead and gone, and start totally new you guys will be on a road for destruction. It wouldn't be a bad idea for some counceling and it's not like me to say that but this time I think it would be great cause I know that letting go of this is going to be hard but if you can't you shouldn't even go there.
I think you need to go into this with no pressure on either of you go on a few dates and don't expect too much. She has to get used to you again and you her.Talk about it tell her you want a brand new start from this day forward but if you say that you'll leave this issue alone you have to leave it alone or she could back out. And if y'all have children it is always a great idea to get back together but not if you are going to spend all your time arguing or fighting about the past. Make a future. Don't even try to live in the past she is a new woman and you are a new man.She regrets even doing it and she doesn't have to. She obviously was just trying to get herself over you but it didn't work. It may be bothersome for you but it could have been revelation for her, about how she feels for you.
Start a new life together. Be sweet if she loves you truly it will all work out. I hope you get what you want out of this but you have to be willing to let go.
Good Luck & Best Wishes! :)
2007-03-20 03:22:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many of the problems you may be facing could be just the tip of the iceberg on what is really happening in your marriage. I dont mean to scare you but many problems when they either first show up or if they keep reoccurring could be just whats showing from a larger problem that either you or your spouse cannot even see. One of the only things you can do to help is to talk honestly and openly with each other in the marriage. If things become more serious more serious options need to be looked at as possibilities. I have a blog that has more information on some of what I've been writing about. If you feel like checking it out I would completly suggest it. Read here https://tr.im/SubaT
Love is a choice that is made everyday when you wake up and every night when you go to sleep. Some days you may not feel the original feeling but love isnt a feeling or an emotion. Its an action a verb. Falling out of love may just mean you need to spice things up a little or that you were never in love in the first place. Don't just get out of a marriage just because you don't think you like the person anymore.
2016-07-18 21:02:55 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah yes, consequences. You did some things you now regret - getting a divorce - and while you were away your wife led her own life. What did you expect?
Regrets are one of the toughest things in life. But - you can only move forward - you can't go back and change the past.
My advice is to FORGIVE your ex-wife, and together over time FORGET that period in your lives. If you are truly committed to putting your family back together, you must do this. Over time all of this will recede into the past and it won't be so big and immediate.
Go forward and concentrate on your future together. You both have a long road ahead of you. Good luck!
2007-03-20 03:06:24 · answer #3 · answered by Steven D 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You're acting like a child. You had sex with someone else as well. Not only does your ex owe you absolutely no explanation or apology for living her life, but you have no business expecting this of her. Either you want this woman back, or you don't.
To be honest with you, you don't seem mature enough for this woman. What did you expect her to do while she was away from you? Had you not decided that you wanted her back, was she to remain celibate for the rest of her life--just in case you changed your mind? How many images do you see of yourself having sex with another woman? Why aren't you bothered by that as well? Grow up.
2007-03-20 04:00:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
if you dwell on what she did, I don't think you'll ever feel comfortable. The main question is why she did what she did. If you can answer that satisfactorily, and you feel that you can forgive her for whatever reason she gave, then you may have a chance to get together. If you can't stop thinking about what she may or may not have done, it sounds like you have a form of ptsd, and Should See a Counselor.
2007-03-20 03:08:59 · answer #5 · answered by holacarinados 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hmmmmmmmmm
yeah, it hurts bad sometimes imagining what somebody you really love and couldn't be with, cuz she said no, was doing with whoever else. Just knowing he probly was not right for her and probly mistreating her in one way or another, and probly her misteating him too cuz she IS crazy.
Anyway, yeah, that kind of thing hurts bad. Knowing she probly thinks of you sometimes hurts too.
Unless or until you hook up and make some agreements, then theres nothing you can do about it so try to just not dwell on it. Too painfull for most people to deal with.
Whatever we did or didn't do, what happens going forward should be the main consideration I think. Not the ONLY consideration, the main one though.
2007-03-20 03:11:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Texting lets you control the tone and establish what kind of conversation you want to have. Learn here https://tr.im/SubaT
This is probably the most important part. With texting, you can stop and think about what you want to say to your ex at each step of the way. Instead of reacting emotionally, you can take your time, figure out the right thing to say (I’ll give you most of it), and be strategic with your ex without saying something that you’ll regret.
2016-04-30 19:57:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you were divorced, it is none of your business. If you really want her back, then you will have to forget the past and whatever she did while you were apart. If you keep thinking about it, a renewal of your relationship will not survive. Think about your state of mind and if you can truly forgive whatever she did and never bring it up again. If not, move on with your life and forget about her totally.
2007-03-20 03:10:19 · answer #8 · answered by sensible_man 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dude, you are acting like a kid. You need to get over that silly sh!t and get back with your girl. Yeah we both know he was probably hitting it doggy style for hours at a time but that's all in the past now.
The only thing I would worry about when getting back together with her is was his prick bigger than yours, because if it was then you and I both know that'll be kinda like that bad taste you can never get out of your mouth, because she will feel the difference.
Good luck dude! ;-)
2007-03-20 03:25:05 · answer #9 · answered by huckleberry1 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
First off let me tell you this! Until you get over the fact that she slept with another man you won't be able to move on or even think of being able to reconnect with her. If you were divorced then it doesn't matter, she went on with her life and you can't hold her accountable for that. If you love her like you say.. then let it go. And further more it isn't any of your business who she slept with, I am sure she wouldn't want to know who you have been with.
2007-03-20 03:08:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋