Am I being stupid for having hurt feelings that my 27 yr old daughter doesnt want me to go to the hospital?

Question

with her while she has her tonsils out?

Answer 1

If your daughter is confident in taking care of herself, then you have done an awesome job preparing her for the future. I think now as a mother of a grown-up daughter, the best way to love your child is by being there for her. You need to trust her that she will honestly tell you when she really needs you. For now, she is being candid - she wants to do this on her own, but needs your support. Believe in your daughter that she can take care of herself. That is one of the greatest gifts a parent can give to their children as they grow up. Pat yourself on the back and enjoy your accomplishment as a mother.
If your daughter, however, is married, she will need to bond with her husband. Again, stepping back out of respectful love and giving her that space is necessary in order to maintain a healthy relationship now and in the future.
I also advise that you don't hold in any anger or pain. You may want to talk over your feelings with your daughter, and have an open, honest, and loving conversation about it. I've done this with my mother, and it has helped heal our broken relationship.

Answer 2

Not stupid maybe overly sensitive.
I thought you were going to say having a baby.

But seriously maybe she thinks it's a straightforward procedure and she doesn't want a big fuss made. Maybe the fact that you want to be there scares her because it makes it more serious in a way.
As a mother I can't say what I would do but as a 27 year old I would prefer not to have my mother at the hospital when I have a baby never mind having my tonsils out. I love her and there are some situations where I really need her
but she is my mother so when she worries, I panic
Remember different people need different things.
She is not denying your ability to be a good mother because she doesn't want you to come to he hospital.
Do the right thing.
Listen to her.
Be a good mother.
And be proud of yourself for that.

Answer 3

You're not stupid for how you feel, but she is 27, it's time to let go a little bit. If she doesn't want you there, don't go. Try not to be upset either. She is an adult that is capable of making her own decisions. The reason she is able to is because of you. You raised her to be a capable human being. Relish in that and let her do her own thing.
When I was 26 and had a difficult labor and was worried out of my mind for my son, I didn't want anybody there (except my husband), including my mom. I felt I had enough to worry about. I didn't want to worry about her being there fretting over me. I wanted calmness and quietness, and I just couldn't have had that if she was there. It wasn't personal, I love my mom, I just needed my space.

Answer 4

You're not stupid for being hurt. As a 29 year old female, I didn't want my mother around when I had a major operation last year. I felt she would hover and worry too much which would stress me out more. I know it's in your instincts to be there, but you'll have to respect her decision. I'm sure she knows you are there if she needs you. Besides, we always call on our moms when we really need them.

Answer 5

Ask the police to have a observe with the little hit guy-wannabe. Make him piss his pants slightly and take his mom and father down a peg or 2. look your daughter has to understand that that boy is basically undesirable information. He harm her brother. that ought to make her mad as hell no longer lovey-dovey. Time to furnish the communicate approximately kinfolk loyalty and picking extra perfect friends. in case you do no longer she might finally end up stunning out with gang contributors by utilising the age of sixteen. What fool supplies a baby a weapon by utilising the way? A BB gun is a weapon.

Answer 6

No you're not stupid. It's okay to be hurt, but I'm sure that was not your daughter's intentions. She's a grown woman and just probably didn't feel the need to have you there with her for something so routinue.

Answer 7

Being a mother you can never be wrong with your daughter dear...every children sees their parents in the guise of God and therefore as children we have greatest expectations from our parents...if she doesn't want you to visit her...don't go...send her a bouquet of flowers and fruits just to make her fee that you are always there beside her...send her flowers daily but don't show your face and once she comes back...give her a warm motherly hug and watch her doing the same :) best wishes !

Answer 8

I know that the bond between children and parents is a unbreakable one but you have to realise that they have to leave the nest at some stage. Does she still live at home? If so, maybe she is being unreasonable but she is a grown adult and has to live her own life. Go and visit her after the operation and bring her some flowers and watch her eat her ice cream.

Answer 9

It depends on her reasons...I would feel hurt if one of my daughters (much older than yours) did not want me at the hospital with them when they had any type of surgery. But on the other hand they are adults and for what ever reason if they did not want me there I would have to respect their wishes. I would want them to explain to me why they did not want me there though! Best Wishes....

Answer 10

Of course not...you are her mother and it's just a natural reaction for you.

She's lucky to have a mother who cares for her so much that you want to be there.

Try to restrain yourself and respect her wishes....she might need you after the operation and then you can fuss over her all you need to.