I know it's none of my business now, but after 5 weeks of separation, my soon to be ex-wife has moved another guy into our old apartment, and I just found out they are getting ready to get married and start a family right away.
It's not my place to be concerned, but hmmm, it seems to me that she may have been running around before I left her, or she is pulling something.
Honestly she was, shall we say, not nice to be with during our marriage, and when she went too far and got too mean, I left.
I am still concerned about her wellbeing, but at the same time, it is not my responsibility anymore.
Should I contact her now estranged therapist (estranged because the therapist told her what she didn't wanna hear)? Or should I just go live my life?
2007-03-19 22:31:19 · 15 answers · asked by fromorto12 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Being concerned is a sign that you weren't a cad in the relationship and that you did and do care: if you shrugged it off with indifference and just after 5 weeks of separation, I'd be more concerned with you.
I would not contact her therapist-- what do you expect him to do- remember, he's not in the picture. If you talk with her she may interpret this as an effort to get back with her and actually may driver deep into the relationship. Your best bet is to let it go... this will be an excellent growth experience for her should it fail (or succeed).
2007-03-19 22:38:36 · answer #1 · answered by Wisdom??? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go on and live your life and take comfort in knowing that Karma (what goes around, comes around) will settle your score when you least expect it. You are right when you say that her well being is not your responsibility any more. She is LEGALLY an adult which means she has to live with the repercussions from the decisions she makes.
You deserve better than a relationship where you are left hanging in a balance from day to day. You did the right thing by leaving. People are not toys you can fix. You can only fix yourself. Take some time to do this. Avoid relationships for awhile. Do some things for you. Go fishing, take a road trip. Do something you wanted to do while you were married that you couldn't do because she didn't like it, etc. Get involved in the Community so you can make friends and get this off your mind. Eventually, you might get another crack at true love, someone who will love you for who and what you are when you least expect it.
Another saying comes to mind. "If they cheat with you, they'll cheat on you". It is true, as I learned about this and Karma during my last relationship. I was engaged while in the military and when I was deployed, my fiancee cheated on me and continued it when I got back to the States. She left me to marry the man she cheated on me with. I wept for awhile but then I got on with my life. For two years, I lived for me with no thoughts of ever marrying anyone. I travelled, went to sports events, etc. Eventually, I met someone on line when all I wanted to do was learn about California. We began a long distance romance.
A year later, I heard from my ex. Her new marriage wasn't working out. Her husband cheated on her and abused her. She regretted leaving me and begged for me to come back.
What happened, I never went back and on March 9th 2006. I married the woman I met on line. I have never been happier. I got a wonderful wife and a great best friend who truly loves me for what I am. There is hope, hang in there!!!
2007-03-19 23:06:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
What does your fiancee say on the priority? that kind of dictates the the reaction. It additionally has plenty to do with their background and modern-day relationship. Does she have some sort of right to look? no longer possibly. whether she is friends together with her ex, that's extra effective than balanced by utilising a teach of appreciate to get out of how for the recent relationship. What does her desirous to attend even extremely ought to do with something? There could be some thing to be pronounced for being the bigger guy or woman, yet screw that. you do no longer ought to be an greater guy or woman for that reason and as long as you do no longer throw a in advantageous condition, in effortless terms the petty will fault you for no longer inviting her. on the different hand, if she's a mature guy or woman who you could have faith to act herself and you're comfortable with it, then go forward. She might even help take care of the step-daughters. besides the shown fact that it sort of looks like your loved ones has substantial sufficient motives that this could be a undesirable thought.
2016-10-02 10:43:27 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry you had to live through this... She obviously had this pretty much planned out and you didn't deserve this treatment from anyone but life is just not always what it should be in this old system of things. I hope you'll find peace of mind and that this won't affect your heart too much. You sound like a nice person and since what goes around comes around in life, you will both end up by reaping what you have sowed. Where you seem to have sowed love and goodness, she chose "treachery" and will have to live with the consequences of her actions. Take care of yourself!!!
2007-03-19 22:41:10 · answer #4 · answered by Teri 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you better get on your hands and knees and kiss the ground for getting away from her. If she jumps from one relationship to another so quickly, she has serious issues. I guarantee you her new relationship will end the same as yours since she didn't take time to figure out what caused your marriage to falter. She's doomed to repeat her mistakes again on the next poor sap.
As far as getting involved, why would you? She has caused you nothing but heartache and needs to learn, on her own, where her problems lie. The best thing you can do is sit back and work on yourself. She will have to make her own mistakes if she's ever going to mature and learn. Good luck. :)
2007-03-19 22:38:31 · answer #5 · answered by VHagerty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
isn't it a good evidence of what kind of woman your ex wife is? i don't mean to hurt you or your ex's feelings but...it is very clear that she didn't even give a damn importance to your past relationship...though you are the who left, if is not yet the right decision to get involve with another man so quickly..
2007-03-19 22:48:57 · answer #6 · answered by kristine-ave 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude, let it go. It sounds to me like you'd like for this woman to be pining away for you. She's obviously over you, so you should move on emotionally too. Bottom line, LET IT GO!
2007-03-19 22:37:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would just go on with my life.She sounds like a greedy nasty person.If she did that to you chances are she will do it to him or he will do it to her.(we can only hope right?)Bad carma what comes around goes around.She will get hers.You sound like a sweet guy.Just be cautious in the future.Good luck honey!!
2007-03-19 22:36:34 · answer #8 · answered by lady2 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You should go live your own life.
2007-03-19 22:40:27 · answer #9 · answered by happy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
move on with your life
2007-03-19 22:54:39 · answer #10 · answered by Coolitz 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋