A 41 year old man moving in with his mother, because he just left his family. The reason he left is because he just wasn't into me anymore ( 14 years together ). And the family life was not for him. The kids and the animals make him to nervous.He does not like the commotion. His mother telling him go out and have some drinks, go to the bar, have fun. Instead of encouraging him to go back to his family. He does not want to see himself as aging,he would not get his portrait done because of that. At christmas the kids started to get out of hand, and instead of dealing with it, he hurried us out to leave. His mother said " he's getting to nervous," All he does is talk about old rock music, and how one day he is going to play the guitar. He used to be in love with Barbie, and he really thought all woman should look like that. He even said to me once, " I can't have kids with you, you are not tall or blond." I thought he was joking, he wasn't. Is thid weird?
2007-03-19 21:19:09 · 18 answers · asked by Teslajuliet 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes, I am afraid it is VERY weird.
How you have managed to have a relationship with someone who cannot 'relate' is beyond me.... yet; people get emotionally involved on different levels for people; and I have to think that you must love this man very much.
I really think that he needs to have a 'severe reality adjustment' but just how; or from whom; is a bit unreal at this time. Perhaps if you figured out a way to tell him that you love him; and get him to SEE what he is throwing away, it might turn things around. Mothers!! His mother is not helping; but obviously that's HER intention. Getting the son to SEE that would be an ace in your pocket!
Good luck with getting this sorted out.
Look after yourself!
2007-03-19 21:26:04 · answer #1 · answered by wise_owl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Strange indeed. Evaluate what you want for yourself first. He has to decide what's best for him. It sounds like he's having a crisis of some sort. Maybe it's the try to recapture lost youth thing? He's a bit old to be a rock star now so he might want to give that AND the Barbie fantasy up because both are unrealistic. He's need to have a few shots of xtra strong Joe or whiskey and wake up. His life and family are calling. His family should be the most important thing, not a guitar or a fantasy that you're not.
2007-03-20 04:38:23 · answer #2 · answered by Iron What? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say the man is dillusional, and that is probably rather charitable.
He needs help, the medical kind, and probably won't get it with his mother around.
On rare occasions people with mid-life crises grow out of it, but it usually doesn't happen on its own.
My first wife didn't want to grow up. She wanted to be a promiscuous teenager again and I hoped she'd get past it someday. One day I realized it wasn't going to happen so I got out of the marriage. You may have to do like I did and sing your own song: "Thank God and Greyhound You're Gone!"
(And Barbie was a tramp!! Ask Ken.)
2007-03-20 04:27:47 · answer #3 · answered by Warren D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hon, you're better off without him. He's got serious issues that your children don't need to be exposed to.
And STOP letting the kids get out of hand!!! As a parent you CAN NOT be their 'friend'. That's what little Johnny & Suzie is for. That's why they have no respect for you (and your husband) and act up. YOU have to be the firm one now. As an expert in this area, I can tell you that a belt on the bottom works wonders.
2007-03-20 04:37:23 · answer #4 · answered by Larry F 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like hubby may have some dark dysfunctional childhood history going on---and mama's zeroed in to reclaim her "lost' (married) sweet little boy.
I'd chalk up a win for mama and divorce this eccentric guy, left to feel pity for a man who carries a strange unrequited love for a child's doll toy....and pray he makes his own efforts at seeking professional help.
You find a sharp lawyer--one ready to argue your eSTRANGEd hubby isn't worming out of his financial divorce obligations, claiming mental illness.......but by the same turn, don't seek to punish him via divorce court-room decision, either.
From the ashes of divorce, you can eventually arise and reclaim a happier life for you as well.
2007-03-20 04:28:52 · answer #5 · answered by Mr. Wizard 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all, why did you married this wierd guy anyways? did you see the sign already? He's a a big problem. I f a were you divorce him and move on, honey, he is bad influence for your kids. Since you have the right state of mind(are you)? no off ense, but its time to "snap out of it" If you love him so much, ask him to get some help, if he doesn't want to, then move on and leave him. goodluck!
2007-03-20 06:07:25 · answer #6 · answered by sure_whatever_29 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mamas boy
2007-03-20 04:32:44 · answer #7 · answered by Hector 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is being narrow minded. He doesn't see the world as it should be and he enclosed himself to his daily routines and have not learnt to cope with people. He certainly has people problems.
2007-03-20 04:27:56 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, a little strange. Sound like he has some unresolved issues from his youth.
2007-03-20 04:24:28 · answer #9 · answered by helloeveryone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Male menopause
2007-03-20 04:22:39 · answer #10 · answered by Ya-sai 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋