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51 answers

Talk to him frankly as good as it is. It is best for both the spouse to settle their matrimonial issue amongst themselves rather washing dirty linen in public. Bedroom stories should not become screen/Internet stories this what I personally feel. But in case the issue is beyond your personal settlement you both should consult a marriage counsellor/physiologist in company of a lawyer who can guide you regarding your matrimonial rights & legal issues. Write to me directly for futher guidance.

2007-03-19 18:28:34 · answer #1 · answered by vijay m Indian Lawyer 7 · 0 3

If he is abusing you for any reason .... you need to get out of that relationship. He has no right to hurt you in any way .... even if you were having an affair.
He has a right to his feelings but to act out in uncontrollable anger is wrong and against the law by the way. You need to stand up for yourself and get some help before he goes too far. Call a friend or family member and get out of there if this happens again. Please take care of yourself , especially if you have children. Growing up in an abusive home is not what they deserve. They're seeing their mother being beaten which leaves no fewer emotional scars than being beaten themselves.You have to be strong and do something about this now !! wish you all the best , take care : )

2007-03-19 18:32:09 · answer #2 · answered by uncle louie 5 · 0 0

This situation only occurs when you hide things from each other.
Sorry to say but after a lady gets married treat your husband as your elder and behave to him like as you used to be to your parents when you were not married. Discuss with him the problems and experiences. He should know the pros and cons of your life.

Same is applicable to a husaband also.

If this problem has occured in your life, if you are working leave the job for few months.Let him grab that you want to settle down.

This is the mental stress by which your husband is abusing you. Talk to him and clearify the tit bits and try to make up your life.

Don't be more frank to the people around you, be quite and calm. This would add to your personality and attitude.

Try these hope your problem will be solved as early as possible as in relationships delay will lead to negligence and serious accident.

2007-03-19 20:18:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Leave him as soon as you can. You didn't say if you have children. If you do think about what it does to them to see their mother treated like that. How will they treat their spouses?

No one deserves to be abused. If you don't get out or get help right away, it will escalate. Take it from someone that knows first hand.

They usually apologize when they think you are leaving. They may be good for awhile, but it will happen again. After going through it so many times, when they say they are sorry, you are thinking, "Yea, a sorry s.o.b.!" The reason is because you know that they will do it again.

Don't waste your life like I did. Get out and find a good man that will not be so jealous, and will give you the respect that you deserve. (Don't let him convince you that you are worthless. They do that to gain control over you. It makes you feel like no one else will want you, so you stay.)

Contact the battered women's program in your area. They will help you get back on your feet, if you need help. If you need someone to talk with, you can contact me at schmittp1053@yahoo.com.

2007-03-19 18:34:27 · answer #4 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0 0

Even abusive people can change, it's rare, but it happens. The first thing you need to do is get out of that house and get yourself and any children you may have into a safe environment. I don't know how far he would go, but if you feel you need to , get a restraining order to protect yourself. You need to seek counseling, you may not realize the extent of it right now, but you HAVE been victimized. Taking steps to protect yourself are the first steps to getting past that. You may very well need professional help to get past the damage (emotional and mental) that he has inflicted on you.

As for your husband, as I said, changing is rare, but it does happen. It depends on if he cares enough to do it. This is not for you, this is for him. He may well have lost his chance with you, that is something only you can decide. But if he is ever going to have a healthy relationship with ANYONE he definitely needs to seek professional help. What he is doing to you is most likely not even instigated by anything you have done. Much like a rape, it is about power and control. The suspicion, accusations, emotional verbal and physical abuse... those are coming from someplace inside him. He needs to address that. If he is drinking or doing drugs, he needs to get sober because everyone knows that will only flame an already hot situation.

2007-03-19 18:40:55 · answer #5 · answered by DazeyChain 3 · 0 0

No one should be abused in anyway for anything. You need to leave him, get counseling and get your life back on track, and you cant do that when your getting hit and slapped and verbally abused everyday. When you do leave him, do it for good, not just for overnight. As the saying goes "Once a abuser, always a abuser". Put a restraining order against him, file for divorce and go on with your life. There are still some really good men left, I know this because I have one.. I tell him I wish I could clone him so that everyone woman could be as happy as I am. He thinks im crazy when i tell him this bc he has very low self esteem from his last marriage of 14 years of pure hell and verbal and physical about (she did it to him, not him to her).

2007-03-19 18:40:49 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 0 0

Dear friend! all I can say is he is not worth spending more time with, if he abuses you mentally or physically,that too for no reason! Be strong! Man abuses a women only when he feels that woman is weaker. Prove that you are strong enough to live your live without him and able to look after your kids. It may hard for the kids to understand in the beginning, but later they would realise that you were right! Move out and lead your life!

2007-03-19 19:27:05 · answer #7 · answered by marie 2 · 0 0

Look closely at these responses 90% of the people telling you to stay when being abused is men that's just sick you need to leave.. and leave right away.. if you still love him and do not want a divorce go to counseling but leave first do not stay in the situation that is harmful to you. If he loves you and is willing to work on the relationship he will go to counseling if not your far better off without him

2007-03-19 18:39:57 · answer #8 · answered by Amy M 5 · 0 0

seem, he's clearly violently mentally unwell. you assert he consulted a psychiatrist and replaced into clinically determined bipolar - yet you do not say if he's being medicated. It particular doesn't sound like it, both with the volatility and the anger and the spending money like water. And if he's being medicated, then he needs further meds, like an anti-psychotic, to regulate his warning signs. those are all nicely-understood bipolar warning signs yet seem - no offense, yet what's faulty with YOU? you're patently waiting for sane, rational habit out of someone who's heavily mentally unwell and apparently untreated. you've someone who's extreme mentally unwell, and also you're questioning about attempting to *convince* him that he's mentally abusing you?!? hi! the entire definition of "mentally unwell" is they are doing stuff it truly is no longer prevalent - why'd ya ever imagine he's meant to do, renowned that he's off his nut, and be calm about it??? Uhhh - yeah, he's mentally abusing you - it extremely is the loopy talking, and also you DON"T opt to post with it. and also you won't be able to communicate rationally with a mentally unwell individual who's on a manic area - so end waiting for to! for sure he "doesn't get the tremendous image" - he's mentally unwell - and apparently you at the instantaneous are not getting the tremendous image both, because right here you're, annoying about what colour to color the deck chairs on the vast. woman, the deliver is going down - do not worry about the colour. communicate with the police about what your ideas are, yet when it were me, i'd take all my stuff that I valued, go away and under no circumstances come again, and divorce him in a heartbeat. do not worry about labeling issues or about attempting to "convince" him of something rational, and DO worry about protecting your self and your kin in alive and in a unmarried piece. you want to appreciate that if he has a psychological sickness and chooses now to not look after it, then you definitely and your kin are in risk. Be proactive.

2016-11-27 00:05:29 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

If you did not do it and he hits you, call the police. Women have rights but I am not sure about India though. Maybe you can try to find out from your local area if there is a family support group or some kind that can offer the advice you need. Take care.

2007-03-19 18:23:44 · answer #10 · answered by happy 4 · 0 0

Dear first of all, see why he is thinking that u ve an affair with someone? Try to talk to him about it and try clear all his misunderstandings. He loves u so much? Do u love him? if ur answers are 'Yes' then try ur best to save this relationship. Talk to him, try to change ur behavior for the one whom ur husband thinks that u ve an affair with. Listen to ur heart - best advisor! If u dont wanna live with ur husband then first make ur position clear and only then ask for the divorce. God bless U!

2007-03-19 21:26:29 · answer #11 · answered by sppl g 1 · 0 0

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