out that he had been talking to his ex online(she is also his sons mother, but they split because she cheated) and had been visiting his son alot and staying there late and to make a long story short they had been writing romantic emails back and forth. I really believe that if I hadnt caught him when i did that he would have cheated further(he didnt sleep with her he says) and honestly i think that i am over it but i really still feel like there is something missing in the relationship. he has said sorry and that he just told her those things so she would continue to let him see his son but he has no goals in life and its a struggle to get him to work and this has even caused us to have a car repoed. but besides that i feel like im not even attracted to him anymore. and i know this sounds crazy but his personal hygeine is not the best and lately is has just really disturbed me. so is this normal? what should i do? i love him, but when is love not enough?
2007-03-19 15:15:04 · 12 answers · asked by sexycat_1984 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Love is nothing without respect.
If you are financially responsible, and he is not equally responsible, he is not showing you any respect.
If he is not taking care of his personal hygiene, he is not showing you any respect.
If he is communicating in a "romantic" way with his ex; whether he says it is so he can see his son or not, he is not showing you any respect.
Why would you become engaged to someone who you are not in love with, and not compatible with and suspicious of???
We have the ability to love a lot of people, we do not have to be in love with them or even like what they are doing.
If he is unwilling or unable to act as a grown up responsible man for you, you need to end this relationship.
2007-03-19 15:28:06 · answer #1 · answered by Sue F 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say but it's over. He has been cheating on you even if there has been no sex. He has a "new" emotional connection with his ex, it's not just about his son. He want her back and it's just a matter of time until he leaves you for her (even if it's after the two of you were married).
It's normal now that you don't feel the same about him for you to notice things you didn't before. That is called being in love, now that you are not those things magically appear as if out of nowhere.
Leave him now and don't look back. The only reason he is sorry is because you caught him. There are plenty of great guys out there that would be happy to have a wonderful girl like you.
2007-03-19 15:23:16 · answer #2 · answered by Just a friend. 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I was in a similar relationship when I was younger with a man like this although we were married & produced a child. Trust me if he is getting worse & you are not attracted to him anymore, then you need to make a clean break. He will probably try to talk you out of leaving (or kicking him out), but you really should. Once you get used to being without him, you will begin to feel like your old self again and begin to feel alive again. Also, if he has no goals & you do, then he is just bringing you down & holding you back in life. You will be so much happier without him. Remember to stay strong...once you've made your decision do not go back on it or you will just be setting yourself back further. Good luck to you!
2007-03-19 15:45:32 · answer #3 · answered by Jeeper64 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you know what your heart is telling you. Leave him. Him emailing his ex is a good excuse, but sounds like there are heaps more reasons there that would make me question why you're together. (BTW, he should not be leading his ex on with romantic talk just to get to see his son either, that's horrible.) If he's not willing to change and you've fallen out of love with him, things are not going to improve!
2007-03-19 16:28:18 · answer #4 · answered by Deborah C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you didnt say when the wedding was suppose to be or if a date has been set. I suggest you dont marry this man . i think you try to find a man that has never been married or is a widowder.
every person has some questions about the other person before they marry some worries . i think you have more many more then most people do .
well that my thinking on this matter . the most important thing is your thinking on the matter. i also suggest you pray .
i hope whatever you do you have a wonderfull life .
2007-03-19 15:57:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
obviously you are slowly getting to a point where, you won't love him as 'much' anymore. Ithe personal hygiene bit, is not silly. I have a thing for that as well. Trust is so pivotal in a relationship. and its obvious, him seeing his ex has taken a toll on ur relationship.my suggestion- take time off and think it through. Sometimes the answers are in our hearts, but we just refuse to listen to it.
2007-03-19 15:36:29 · answer #6 · answered by babo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
With every sentence you write, it is clearer and clearer that this is not the man for you. It sounds like he is interested in the woman. His excuses are just that, excuses.... Cut your losses and get out. Love doesn't sneak around behind your back.
2007-03-19 15:26:23 · answer #7 · answered by rng4alngtyme 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Figure out what makes you happy. You may love him, but it may not be healthy for you to be in the relationship. Maybe it's time to give him an ultimatum. I know it's worked for plenty of my friends.
2007-03-19 15:19:19 · answer #8 · answered by dead_end_lies 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
whenever u stop appreciating what u have...
whenever u start seeing -ves and +ves start dissapearing
whenever doubt/3rd person comes between the love
whenever u think u have had enough and its time to muv on.
2007-03-19 15:20:32 · answer #9 · answered by masku darling 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
what's the matter with you he'll only bring you down dump him he 's no good you'll end up taking care of him he the type
2007-03-19 17:30:20 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋