I have a15 yr old who will be 16 in May. He is rude, disrespectful, and makes everyone in the house upset. I have tried everything I can to help him with his anger issues. Ive taken him to dr, councelors, phyciatrists, he is ADHD, and takes med for it. Although he refuses to take it. He has been suspended from school numerous times. Seems like the whole school year hes spent suspended. And if he isnt suspended he refuses to go to school. Ive talked to his dr and school officials regarding his behaviour. I dont know what to do. I am 8 mon. preg. with high risk. I feel like he hates me. I try to talk to him all the time and i tell him that I love him. He just acts as if Im not there. I am so tired and deperate. What can I do, He is out of control.
2007-03-19 12:43:34 · 16 answers · asked by Baby boy blue 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
His bio father is a total loser, he is currently in prison and was never there. My husband now of 13 years has raised my son since he was 3, He is a good man always has tried to do the best he can for him. My son doesnt act like this with me when he is home cause my husband wont tolerate it. My husband is gone at work two weeks out of the month.
2007-03-19 17:35:27 · update #1
HE IS 15
2007-03-19 12:46:58 · answer #1 · answered by Princessofpie 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
First off let me tell you that the medicine doesn't work. Believe me I am ADHD and the medicine they had me on (three different kinds) didn't work. In fact it made me suicidal, and made me more messed up than I was. Here is what you do. ADHD is something one out grows. I still catch myself having hyper moments now and I am 28. Check into a boot camp for him one that will give him discipline in his life. Or find something he is interested in and have him blow all his energy on that (sports, band, auto mechanics, etc.). ADHD is not only a hyper disorder it also is an antention defisite disorder. So find something he is Interested in and let him have at it. One other thing He is 15 and teens think they know all. Just hang in there you will get through this. Do a lot of praying and spend time with him when you can, show some interest in what he is doing and he will be just fine. If that doesn't work you might want to see a specialists about autisim I have 6 kids three who are autistic and your son sounds just like my oldest boy now. and If that doesn't work There is a great Book I want you to read. Go to the book of proverbs and read chapter 15. you will find your answer there. The book is called the BIBLE , trust me I don't know where I would be without that book. It also answers many many other questions.......... Congratulations on your baby
2007-03-19 20:05:34 · answer #2 · answered by James H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi im a 15 year old girl and when my older brother was 16 he was a totally rebelled all the time he even got expelled ,so mother had tried everything finally she sent my brother to a boot camp in flordia. we missed him so much but 2 months later he came back a respectful and kind person and now he is 24 and is studing law at a college in Boston . He is also engaged to a awsome women named Emily he loves her so. but thats just my advice my mother says she felt like the worst mother in the world when she sent him away but as soon as he came back she couldnt be more proud. Even thought that may seem out of reach you could also try to get him involed in clubs or sports activities,try to encourage him to hangout with different groups of people , try finding a support group or something to help him,maybe instead of just counsling for him try counsling for the whole family,also if your not involed in a church it might be good for him to be around people that set a respectable behavior to possibly influnce him, and just keep your head high you will make it through this your a wonderful mom for caring about your son like you do and he loves you no matter what he says or does.
p.s u might trying doing like a family night once a week where you all have dinner and play a board game or watch a movie together afterwords!!!Good luck and congradulations on your BABY!!
2007-03-19 20:08:30 · answer #3 · answered by hunny_bunn101 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may be the typical teenage syndrome of "My Mom is stupid and I know more than she does". I'm sure he loves you he's just too surly to show it. I think the most important thing for you to do (with the support of his father) is to let him know that you are the adults in this situation. Make the rules and let him know that he WILL follow them. If he breaks the rules ground him, take away his computer, allowance, tv, etc. Be firm but fair. Don't overreact to his tirades and don't coddle him. You may also want to talk to a doctor about ODD - Oppositional Defiant Disorder. It's sometimes experienced by kids with ADHD.
2007-03-19 20:00:06 · answer #4 · answered by kgee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son has ADHD too. Same attitude.
It is not hate of you, it is fear...
He is afraid of the future. He is growing up.
What will he do when he becomes a man?
What schools should he go to? And what courses to take?
Should he do trade, college, or just get a job...?
And WHAT job? Will he be successful, or a flop?
Throw in the fact that children with ADHD to not get "rem" sleep at night (they have trouble sleeping), they look "moody and angry" all day.
My son ask for only one thing; his space. To hide in his room.
We give him that, every night. School is not an option. We call the police when he get's out of control. Again, fear, puts him back in line again.
If he keeps getting suspended from school, then he is crying out that the school is not helping him with his problems. We found our son another school that has teachers who understand ADHD. Now he loves school.
No, this is NOT easy. But it does get better, in small ways.
PS They hear what you are saying. They just don't answer.
2007-03-19 19:51:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I baby sat a kid with ADHD and he was rude mouthy one time he even kicked me in the face..so i know how that can feel now hes the sweetest kid...beacuse they took him off medication..some doctors say that its best not to give him any...an i advice u jus to sit down and talk to your son and see whats bothering him...it could be something to do with school..which is why hes acting the way he is twoards you...regardless if he says things and you think he hates you but what he really needs is someone to show him that they love him...i think mayb going to get him help wasnt the right answer sometimes a cure is to try an spend time with him and bond...he doesnt hate you your his mother just remeber that...goodluck
2007-03-19 19:51:11 · answer #6 · answered by ? 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that you have these problems, especially during a high risk pregnancy. Did you ever talk quietly with him and asked him what he would like to do in his life??
Is he maybe on other drugs (illegal) or in a gang that he behaves this way? It feels like you did already all these things for him. Does he not have a father in his life or someone else besides you who could talk a little sense into him?
Just tell him over and over that you care for him and try to be there and listen. maybe he will open up one day. Unfortunately I do not have any good advise for you. Good luck!
2007-03-19 19:51:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a teenager.
Im a teenager myself and am pregnant.
Teenagers have a lot of hormone probelms, but thats what makes them them.
Yeah, he'll grow out of it and mature.
Boys at this age can be immautre and seriously slow at the bigger things in life.
Not to be rude or disrefectuful to your son :D
And if you're pregnant and he's not doin anything.
I say you ground him, take out t.v., computer, hanging with friends, sit him down for a talk. Not to long of a talk tho, he might not be listening to you and just spacin out if you keep talking too much lol.
Then maybe sooner or later, he'll listen
2007-03-19 19:52:09 · answer #8 · answered by Pursuit of Happiness 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think he "hates you." I am 15 and although many times i feel as though i "hate" my mom, i know i don't. It's hard being a teenager. I feel a lot of pressure from my siblings and parents and friends to be a perfect student and human being. Many teens tend to mix up their priorites and see school as secondary. Maybe offer to take him somewhere he likes to go, out to lunch, shopping for new_____fill in the blank with something he likes. Or talk to him about his hobbies so that you feel that you are more connected with him.
2007-03-19 19:51:01 · answer #9 · answered by Stephanie 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
its not ur job to care if ur son hates you or not. its your job to keep him safe and under control. ur his mother, you tell him to take his pills. he seems to not respect you. maybe you should work on that. and talk to him as an adult he could feel a new baby could cause a problem with his life. talk to him and ask. in ur response u say you talk to his drs and school but maybe talking to him ALL the time isnt best. wat u can do is get him under control. if his father is present get his father in. or he oculd just be going through puberty and teenage rebellion...
2007-03-19 21:47:57 · answer #10 · answered by spruded 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is his father actively involved in his life? Being a man is a learned behavior by being around other men. Is there a man
that he looks upto who models respect for women? Does he have a mentor?
2007-03-19 19:48:06 · answer #11 · answered by MARK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋