if an father is not paying maintance should he see his children?.?

Question

my sister in law has been devorsed and her ex husband who regulary hit his wife and children only see's the children when he wants to. is it right he's not paying any maintance then he should not see them. I know he's now got no job but living at the ymca but dose get dole money. even if he gave £5.00 per child per week would be exceptable. Answers please.

Answer 1

There are legal, moral and intuitive answers to this one.

Legally, the mother cannot keep the father from his children because he is delinquent with his child support. The reason for this is that the law presumes a right on the part of the children to keep their relationship with their father. At least this is the law in most jurisdictions. In other words, the support issue is in general legally separate from the visitation issue.

Morally, I think that a father hasn't the right to abandon his children or refuse to support them, no matter what may be going on between him and the mother. By the same token, a mother hasn't the moral right to destroy the relationship between a child and his father because she may be justifiably angry with him.

Intuitively, it makes some sense in terms of the justice of the situation to prevent a delinquent father from seeing his kids, but that does not take into account the fact that this kind of arrangement gives the father an "out" if he wants to avoid child support.

On the other hand, if there are genuine violence issues in the situation, then it definitely makes sense to try to keep the father away. But this does not relieve him of the obligation to support his children.

The way to proceed in that situation is to obtain a temporary restraining order based on the family violence issues while simultaneously trying to enforce his financial obligations to the children. This will theoretically keep the ex-wife and kids out of harm's way and it has the advantage of being legal.

You may want to tell her to contact her state Attorney General. Most states have some kind of enforcement program that might help her.

Good luck.

Answer 2

Consider this problem from the perspective of the children. Should a child be deprived of knowing a parent because that parent is unable to earn enough money to meet his obligations?

Where I live, the law says child support and visitation are separate matters and failure to pay does not prevent a parent from spending time with his or her children.

If the non-contributing parent were living in grand style and not paying, it would be worse than living at subsistence level and being unable to pay.

The person you mentioned may not be a model parent or even a good person, but unless the children would be endangered by associating with him, it is probably in the best interest of the children to know that both parents want to be involved in raising them.

Answer 3

She should give him a chance to prove himself by turning up for the kids when he says he will. If he has no money theres not a right lot you can do about that but hope he one day grows up and realises he has responsibilities for his own flesh and blood,
Then if he doesnt do what hes said it would be better for the kids not to have contact you cant keep letting kids down. Though if hes hit the kids before dont let the bas**** near them.

Answer 4

If he was physically abusive to the wife and/or children then I don't think he should be allowed to see them, period. He should have to help support them financially though. However, if by giving financial support that gave him a right to see the children, then I'd tell him to keep his money. The children would be better off.

Answer 5

If that man hits his children, then he has no right seeing them. She can force him to find a job by going to family court and file a petition for him to pay. The court will have him go job hunting until he gets hired.

Answer 6

he has no job how can he pay support? If he hit his wife and kids no..he should not be able to see his kids.HOWEVER,,, if he is TRYING to resolve his anger issues and TRYING to get a job then he should see them in SUPERVISED visits. If he can't keep up regular visits then he shouldn't be able to see his kids.But kids..need the love of both parents..if he is trying to get better he should be given a second chance for the kids sake.

Answer 7

the way it went 6 years in the past with my x and that i became like this: he did no longer sign the beginning certificates however the try proved he became the daddy I signed up for baby help and he had the choice to the two sign papers asserting that confident he became the daddy and he might help pay for her or he ought to sign his rights to her away which meant no touch no visits no no longer something on the subject of her. He signed papers asserting he became the daddy and pays his baby help like a guy could. It takes 2 to make a sprint one and in case you're accountable sufficient to help in creation then you could step up and help preserve that youngster, this is my opinion besides.

Answer 8

If he is a danger to them now, definetely no but If he is a good father, the most important thing is the kids and if they want to see him, let them or else they are going to hate you later. Money is important but it is not what really matters in the end.

Answer 9

Well, the politically correct answer would be to let the law dictate what is right. As a mother, NO WAY!!!

Answer 10

no idont think he should see the children specially if his hit his wife and children