Why is it I hurt myself when I open my heart to people?

Answer 1

if you never got hurt, you could never fully appreciate it when you meet the right person, the one who will love you no matter what.

Answer 2

Actually, I think you should clarify your question. When you say you hurt yourself, do you mean that you end up getting hurt by the other person? Or do you mean that you do things to hurt yourself when you open your heart to others? Because I have seen both happen.

Opening your feelings to another person leaves you incredibly vulnerable. Of course, opening your feelings is the only way to really communicate with someone else on a meaningful level. Unfortunately, people often have a way of stepping on each others' toes.Sometimes this is intentional, and sometimes it isn't.

The key to protecting yourself here is patience. Take your time getting to know the person before becoming too open. Usually, this is enough, but it won't always work.

Fortunately, getting hurt doesn't last forever, and eventually you will find someone who won't leave you devastated.

Unfortunately, sometimes we don't believe that we'll find someone who won't hurt us. This is the reason why people will often sabotage their relationships with others right after opening up to them. We usually do this in an attempt to prevent ourselves from being hurt. Ironically, we end up hurting ourselves, but somewhere we must think that the pain of the other person's eventual betrayal must be far worse.

Perhaps if you added more detail to your question you could get a more accurate answer?

Answer 3

Maybe because you open your heart to the wrong people. Sometimes when we are lonely, we tend to "overlook" red flags that may be waving that would otherwise be obvious because we are so desperate to have SOMEONE that we "settle" and end up getting hurt by someone that wasn't good for us in the first place. Up your standards a little. Start deciding what kind of person you want to allow to share your life with you, instead of settling for whatever you can get. Watch miraculous things happen! We get what we demand for ourselves. As long as we're reasonable, and have good intentions, and love ourselves....we'll find someone that will really love us, and not hurt us (intentionally). Be choosy. It'll pay off in the long run. Good luck!

Answer 4

Because you are a man and you have no heart to open. You don't understand emotions and if you trust your emotions, you are a fool.

One thing men have been duped on since the feminization of society, is that they have feelings, and that if they would just share their feelings, that it would be all better.

That is how women operate, not men. When men REALLY show their emotions, it is TERRIFYING.

So all you're doing is being wimpy and trying to B.S. people into thinking you're deep. You aren't, and I say that with a ton of love for you.

Be a man - be strong, be confident, be unwavering in who you are, be a man of courage, honor, fortitude, and also be a man of your word.

If you behave in this way you won't need to share your feelings.

FP

Answer 5

Everyone gets hurt. It's hard to open up to people b/c you never know what will happen. But if you don't open up, no matter what the consequences, you'll never know what "could have been". People are not going to go into a long term, committed relationship with someone who doesn't completely open up to them. It's a risk, but that's life.

Answer 6

It is because you are opening up to the wrong kind of people.. You need to be more careful who you choose to trust and talk to and confide in. When you find the right person you wont be hurt when you open up to them. Good luck to you. Dont every give up and keep on trying and trusting and someday things will get better for you .

Answer 7

To love at all is to be venerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin or your selfishness. But in that casket--safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable...The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers...of love is Hell.
C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves, Harcourt, Brace & World, Inc., 1960, p.169.

Answer 8

Because we never learn to love the right people and we are kind and open and bad people take advantage of that. Smile, stay positive, have a sense of humour and joke about stuff to get you through it. You haven't met the right people, stay positive and it will come back to you, same with negativeity. keep a stiff upper lip and you will be fine, take care Heather

Answer 9

Why is it that we all hurt ourselves when we open our heart to people????
Love and relationships is all about taking chances.
The risks we take are sometimes worth it and sometimes they are not.
When we take the risk and are rewarded it can feel ever so good.
Keep opening up and find your reward. The hurt can be worth it when you find your true reward.

Answer 10

Probably because you're choosing the wrong people to get involved with.