It seems i have not accomplish any thing and i feel like it is to late. I am 43. Most of my friends drive nice cars and are buying nice homes. And i am in a dead beat job. I feel like a failure.
2007-03-19 10:57:16 · 14 answers · asked by ? 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
I am in my 40s and alot of people my age are feeling this way seems parents were alot better off than we are but just remember it could be worse
2007-03-19 11:02:10 · answer #1 · answered by hollybell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 52 and at 43 feeling that way is okay. It will change as you move closer to 45. And yes, like some of the other younger readers said, they feel that way sometimes too. Guess what folks. The longer we live we are going to feel like that sometimes. 40 was a milestone because society (mass media) promotes it that way. Between 40 + 45-47 are your "between years". You haven't reached 50, the infancy of wisdom but you sure ain't 30 anymore. In your late 40's you start getting ready for the next phase of growth which is 50. when you get 50 you will find a sense of empowerment. For some people it is subtle for some it is blatant. It has nothing to do with the MATERIAL things you have or don't have. It's about beginning or feeling comfortable in your own skin. Your 40s are when you usually begin the baby steps of identifying and accepting who you are. You are able to look at your own shortcomings and not fall apart and at the same time, you begin to work on the things you want to keep about yourself and your character and work at eliminating the behaviors you don't like. When 50 comes it has usually simmered into you are comfortable with who you are. You realize you are not perfect and could be better, but you also realize you aren't so bad in your character afterall.
You say you have a dead beat job. How long have you had it? If it has been a long time, that is a good and rare thing. Do you really know how your co workers view you? You may be looking at yourself in a much lesser way then they do. What do you call a "nice" home? Where I live, people think is is mandatory to buy a 250,000 - 300,000 house complete with "marble" counters, high ceilings, and 2 INCHES of land around them so that if you look out your window you see another house almost similar to yours. Or if they have land then they are so far apart they don't know their neighbor.
That is not success to me. I want real property and a house that isn't stripping the environment. Do you help someone else at least once a week whether it is just to smile at them or open the grocery store door? When you recognize you have made a mistake, do you feel bad about it and try to do something about it or work to make sure you don't do that same mistake again? What have you allowed yourself to do? When was the last time you literally did nothing, read a book, took a walk in a park or by a lake? Sounds like you have yourself around too many material minded people or you could be too busy looking at others and not looking at what you do have.
On another note, how is your health? No really. Do you take vitamins? And I don't mean Centrum or One a Day. When the human body is low on B-vitamins it can affect how we feel. What is your sweet intake like?
I am not unhappy right now with my life. I have to fight impatience at waiting for the things that I know are coming :-) but not unhappy. Allow yourself to feel better and you take charge to make that happen.
2007-03-19 18:24:00 · answer #2 · answered by Hospital 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not ENTIRELY happy with where I am right now. However, I think I'm on the right path, and I'll be there in a few short years. My husband is in the Army, and we're currently stationed overseas. It's hard to be away from "home" and away from our family and friends. However, we've decided that it would be best for us to settle down somewhere soon. We have an eight year old, and I don't think it's the best idea to uproot him every couple years for a new duty station. My husband will be getting out of the Army in a little over three years now. We'll move back home, buy a house, settle down, and raise our babies. I look forward to settling down somewhere, and raising my kids in a house that they'll bring their kids to someday!
2007-03-19 18:07:07 · answer #3 · answered by Patty O' Green 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me tell you the truth about my life: I have felt the EXACT same way as you for nearly 3 years. I got married very young, and took a few years off of high school, I just recently went back and am now taking courses through correspondence to receive my high school diploma. Almost all of my friends are in their fourth year of university, and as if that isn't bad enough, those friends of mine always remind me that "you're taking so long to finish school" blah blah blah. Well, half of those girls are not my friends anymore (but that's a different story.)
Anyways, it is hard when I am around them and they are all at the same level, while I am years behind of them, but I try and remind myself that I am me and they are they. You cannot compare yourself to them because you are completely different people. And by you saying they have nice cars and nice homes makes it sound as if they are very materialistic. Step back and ask yourself if having those things will REALLY bring happiness and meaning to your life. I don't know why you do not like your job, but maybe you should consider looking for another job if you are not happy there. I don't know, that really depends on you and if you are ready to take that plunge.
I truly believe that all of the good things in life are free. Love, family, friends, nature.
Good luck, my friend.
2007-03-19 18:06:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can turn things around. The most productive years often follow the kinds of days you're having right now. I can name several dozen people that used this negative energy and made huge life changes for the better. Go to your local library and get the book "The Secret" and read it it may change your life. Think of JK Rawling, she was 41, close to giving up and bam...
2007-03-19 18:04:35 · answer #5 · answered by TJTB 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg, you need to watch friends with money, a jennifer aniston movie! other than that you can live a fulilling life IN a dead beat job. you can have hobbies, be in groups, be in sports, travel on a budget, you can do whatever you like to enjoy this life EVEN in a dead beat job! stop making excuses and enjoy yourself!!
2007-03-19 18:00:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know, i fele the same wsay, except, i'm in junior high and i feel so pressured and made fun iof,..we were put in this world for a reason..we shoudkl keep our hopes up and be confident and e willing to make a difference! WE CAN DO IT!!! just hope and prey for a better life..but, you know, chances are , there is probably atleast 1 other person who is in trouble mpor ethan you.. :) good luck!
2007-03-19 18:00:56 · answer #7 · answered by ♥ MEOW ♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go 2 peekvid and watch the movie the secret it will motivate u 2 make ur life what u want it 2 b
2007-03-19 18:03:11 · answer #8 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i go thru moments...i'm not particularaly pleased with where i'm at right now, but i am in the process of making strides in the right direction. i am seeking happiness...and i will not give up
2007-03-19 18:04:26 · answer #9 · answered by ME 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two steps forward one steps back.. Cheer up. You ain't on your own.
2007-03-19 18:00:05 · answer #10 · answered by DARIA. - JOINED MAY 2006 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋