me and my husband are now married. NOthing is fun now. we just look at each other everyday. what activities can we do? i've tried going bike riding but its pretty boring. help me pleeeaaassseee!!
2007-03-19 09:28:59 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have been married for 27 years. And very VERY happily I might add. But, there is some time and "training" that go into this if you want it to work.
First of all most men have a hard time planning anything that takes longer than 5 minutes. And it's not because they don't love you, they are just, well........lazy.
So it's going to be up to you. And if you want him to do things with you that you like, you have to start to do things that he likes first. Men are just big large boys, and they want to do what they want to do, and if you start him out on things that you like to do, but, he may not find appealing, then you will have a hard time having fun. There is nothing worse than going on a "date" and have them make you feel bad because it's boring and a waste of money.
So you have to really find out what his interests are and then use that to plan activities that center around his likes.
If he is into cars, motorcycles etc, then you need to take him to a demolition derby or a moto cross event or a antique auto show.
If he likes to build things and do yardwork or home improvement, then take him to a home improvement show. And whatever you do with him, be enthusiastic, learn to appreciate the things he likes, because they will and do have merit. And if you want him to be tolerant, and even enthusiastic with your interests, then you have to be the example. You have to show him how you want him to react by doing it.
You see what I mean. Then as time goes by you can introduce him to things you like to do.
In the end though, marriage isn't always fun and games. Sometimes you are just bored. And that's okay. Sometimes you have to remember to just be thankful for each other. And relish in the quiet moments as well.
The old saying goes, you don't know what you've got til it's gone. I have seen this play out so many times with other couples.
And in the end they both regret it.
My best friends husband passed away suddenly and shockingly about a year and a half ago and she says even now she remembers all kinds of tiny little moments, moments that she thought weren't important at the time. That mean volumes to her now. She wishes she could go back and tell him what she was thinking, or give him that little space that he wanted, or that little hug or kiss that he wanted. To relish in the little moments, because when it's all over, that is what people remember. The LOVE!!
So while it's alright to look for fun and excitement, it's important to gain a new appreciation for the little boring moments. Because they are significant. These are the moments that bond you and make you soulmates forever. So relish and be thankful for all the moments.
They are all special.
2007-03-19 09:51:51 · answer #1 · answered by Harley Girl 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
What did you two do when you were dating? Just 'cause you are married, does not mean to end the dating time. Please sit down with him, come up with "a game plan" of what type of activities you would like to do, that you did and enjoyed together when you were dating. Depending on your budget, if you can, go out once a week, if not, at least twice a month. Go bowling, swimming, hiking, or for long walks on the beach, or at the park. Go on picnics. And, depending on the weather where you are, sometimes just have a picnic in your livingroom. Or do that if you want a romantic fun evening at home, picnic by candle llight. Maybe make up some "coupons" for each other put them in a jar, and once a week or once a month, pull one out and do what it says on there as an activity. Give each other back massages, go play miniature golf, go out for ice cream. Or some kind of dessert. Maybe go do dinner out once a month or so. Get away for a night in a motel, or hotel. Yes, it's the two of you now, but what about time for the two of you when children come along? Yes, there will be times to do things together as a family, and there will need to be times for just the two of you to be together, alone, so the two of you can talk, about anything and everything--but the kids, work, etc. Hire a babysitter for those times. Even if it means getting together (even now) for a walk for an hr or two. I wish the two of you the best. Take care.
2007-03-19 10:45:06 · answer #2 · answered by SAK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am newly married since Oct. 2006, and the wedding date was a big event, all the planning and details, and honeymoon, and the big move, but once everything settled there was this quiet time, like what do we do now. I liked it, but I told my husband we need to keep a social calender where we do things with other people, and with our children so our lives are full, and we have and it has been great. We never stop, and we still have all the mad sex like we use to before we got married only more.
2007-03-19 09:42:13 · answer #3 · answered by Maria A. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what did you enjoy doing before you were married?
as for me and my hubby, we still have a date every week, and we have our own hobbies. spending too much time together can interfere with the relationship. when you have a date go to a movie in the park, or a fave restaurant of yours or a club you like! just because you are married doesn't mean you just sit a home and stare at each other! get out there and have some fun! good luck!
2007-03-19 09:38:53 · answer #4 · answered by Carrie H 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Try new restaurants (my husband and I have this little italian place we go too, it's a hole-in-the-wall place but we love it). Go walking together. Get a pet or volunteer at the animal shelter together. Try new recipes together (I recommend the Newlywed Cookbook - all recipes are for two). Find a TV show you both like (my husband will never admit it but he enjoys Desperate Housewives). And just keep trying new things... eventually you'll find stuff you both enjoy.
2007-03-19 09:38:50 · answer #5 · answered by *Just Married* 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been married 4 months, and I can't find time to take a break! We're always doing something - working on the house, traveling, or having sex. I can't understand your predicament.
2007-03-19 09:38:15 · answer #6 · answered by ldgbt 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you and your husband have the same interests? If not maybe you can trade off. Do something you like, and then do something he likes. That will make you feel closer to each other, by learning each others likes and dislikes. it might give you more insight into each others character.
2007-03-19 09:42:06 · answer #7 · answered by kalischild57 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
SEX!!!!
I think that's why married people have children. Not just because we have nothing else to do but have sex, but also because the relationship can get boring. So what do we do? Have kids, of course.
2007-03-19 09:38:19 · answer #8 · answered by nicolehope 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have a movie rental night and order pizza and snuggle on the couch watching them and eating.
Play board games
miniature golf, bowling, walking in a metro park, shopping
2007-03-19 09:37:09 · answer #9 · answered by FiFi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen to Nice Lady. Lots of Sex! or farting contests. Have you tried getting drunk & dancing in front of another- Fun Times.
2007-03-19 10:36:56 · answer #10 · answered by Minilover 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋