and Then tryed to tell the cops that he didnt do anything,,Well He is ALOT bigger then me.and I had all the marks to show to the cops.well he tryed to sit there and deny it because of his work,He is in the avation field.I love him but i wont let this go any farther,I came into this relationship from a domestic violence relationship prior to this.I love this man more then anything but sometimes i wonder what i am to him......Why is there a sudden of outburst on his part..He is still Currently married but is in the mist of a divorce from his 1st wife...Is not seein his kids makin him do this.He hardly talks to me anymore.I Have no family where we live now..And all my family is over 1000 miles away..What should i do......
2007-03-19 08:59:12 · 46 answers · asked by Breeanna 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He choked you.
What he told the cops is irrelevant.
How big he is is irrelevant.
His denial is irrelevant.
The field he is in is irrelevant.
How much YOU love HIM is irrelevant.
Why the sudden outburst is irrelevant.
His current marital status is irrelevant.
His relationship with his kids is irrelevant.
How much he talks to you is irrelevant.
He choked you. That's what is relevant. Behave accordingly.
2007-03-19 09:15:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay this madness has to stop! Your first mistake was even getting involved w/a married man.You are selling yourself short and once you accepted him knowing that he was married,it lowered the level of respect that he had for you. It's apparent that he has no respect for himself, his wife, kids or you because he would have waited until his divorce was final before starting anything with you. Regardless of his job field he broke the law when he physically abused you! This makes him an ABUSER and there's no excuse for his actions! Have you ever wondered why his wife left him& not able to see his kids? I'm sure that he was always abusive it's just that you are now seeing and feeling it. It probably wasn't as physical before but there were signs I'm sure. Never leave your family for a man because it seems as if he wants you isolated from your family, friends and love ones so that he can controll you and have you depend on him. You should honestly get out of the relationship before it's too late or gets worst. It's not even about why he's doing this, it's about how could he do this to someone that he's suppose to love? Ask yourself this, do you find yourself crying more tears of joy or pain? You don't deserve this type of treament and it's time to move on. It may take some time and a lot of tears and pain, but trust me you'll get over it and you'll be a much stronger person. Hold your head high and don't look back. When you allow someone to dictate your self worth, you give them the authority to treat you like anything. Love and embrace yourself because I know that you can get over this temp. set back. You are stronger than you think!!!!!!
2007-03-19 09:35:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a very hard situation and am sorry you are going through this. First off, it is probably not the first time he has don't it to a women. He is probably angry which does not give him a reason to do that by any means, but he needs to get some counseling to be able to get past the anger and learn how to deal with it. As for you, there are a few things you can do, you can stay and hope things get better, or in every state there are programs that will help with getting you into your own place or into a group home that will be a little safer for you. It is your choice, just think about you and what you need to do. Good luck to you and be careful.
2007-03-19 09:06:59 · answer #3 · answered by xyz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't matter if he has troubles, he shouldn't hurt you. You should only think of your health first. The way you talk, saying you won't let it go any further it seems that you've made up your mind already and just want to talk. There are domestic abuse chatrooms and hotlines where you can talk to people and get good advice. I personally think you should leave and go back to your family, if he hurts you any more before or during the time you try to get things ready, there are women's shelters that you can stay at. There are always a places to go to for help when women need it in this country.
2007-03-19 09:06:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were in a relationship with domestic violence before, you should be aware of the signs. He may be having problems dealing with his divorce and not seeing his kids, but denying what he did to you and the police is just that.. denial. Learn from your past relationship that this will just get worse. They start slow and move up to more violent things. You should get away from him until he gets his stuff in order and has had some counselling before even considering seeing him again.
2007-03-19 09:04:04 · answer #5 · answered by mayihelpyou 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would get out of this relationship your first abusive relationship didn't work out so would make this one work! And if he loved you so much then he would have gotten a divorce from the very beginning life is to short to have to deal with all that.Sometimes when you love someone you have to let them go! Espically when they are beating you. and it can only get worse before it gets better!! You shouldn't put up with it anymore! You should take some time off and maybe go visit your family they can always help! Well I truely hope this all works out for you. Good Luck!!
2007-03-19 09:07:30 · answer #6 · answered by jacks 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were you I would try to arrange a meeting with his wife to find out if he has been like this to her. Why then would she try to keep the kids away from him? She might be just trying to protect them from him because he is this way. WIfe beater don't show this unless they are comfortable i the realtionship where they think that you won't leave them or they have a hold on you. What you should to is get away from him go to a friend's house or something and stay away from him because he is out to hurt you.
2007-03-19 09:11:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave now while you can. Don't say s**t just go. Move back home and pick up where you left off. You still love him but it is evident he does not love you anymore. No man who loves a woman will bring harm to that woman, protect her? yes, harm her? NO. He is falling off on the deep end again and will take you with him. So end this while you still have a chance.
2007-03-19 10:01:18 · answer #8 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call your family immediately and arrange transportation home. Until that can be done, go to a domestic violence shelter to seek assistance. Cut off all communication with this man.
2007-03-19 09:04:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him and get out NOW.... Stay with a friend if need be or go to a safe house but get out asap!!!! Why in the world are you with a married man anyways??? Was he abusive to his wife at all??? I think he may have been and this may be a pattern with him. You are nothing but a punching bag to him if you ask me and he is just using you so get out now!
2007-03-19 09:06:05 · answer #10 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋