It seems to me that most stable relationships lack the kind of passion unstabe relationships have. By passion I mean strong emotions, highs and lows. I wonder if this is the feeling unhappily married people are looking for when they say their relationship lacks passion. For example, my husband and I rarely fight, I know he's coming home when he says he will, I try to do what I can to keep him happy, but I feel like there's no passion. I had a boyfriend before him who called me names, was extremely jealous, it was terrible, but I always had some feeling towards him, whether it was love or hate. I love my husband, but mostly feel apathetic about him since there are no strong emotions. I don't want an unhealthy, unstable relationship, but I wonder, is that the feeling people are looking for when they say they want passion? Would they really be happy if they experienced it?
2007-03-19 07:09:21 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I understand passion in a relationship as excitement, as longing for one another, as that can't be without the other person feeling. I don't understand passion as having the negative slant like always having feelings even if it is hatred.
Passion is not being in a routine all the time and having some variety and excitement in the relationship.
Relationships that lack passion are when the couple doesn't care about one another or they are stuck in a boring "day-in/day-out" routine, or they don't always know why they are together.
Hope that makes sense and helps.
2007-03-19 11:42:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage has different faces for the word "passion". Most of the times, when you are married, you completely know the other person that there are no "new" things and time and energy sometimes, is little to "figure new things out". You are not alone, this is what marriage can become but try to do things with your husband, that you both enjoyed very much. Remember why you love him in the first place, why you are with him. Work on that, and maybe, the good things, THE PASSION, will come back. It takes two to have "passion" at all times. Talk to him, ask him, what was it that put "passion" in "OUR" marriage. Good luck!
2007-03-19 07:17:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think some people are just more demonstrative of their emotions than others, when they are happy, or excited or jealous or insecure, they show all their colors and expressions, while others are more subdued in their response mechanism. It's what makes women go crazy for the bad boy, it's his bravado, his swagger, his out right demonstration of passion, but along with that fever comes a burn sometimes, and a more subdued partner would not break your heart all the time, it is a balance. I love passion but as I get older I respect the quieter passion that some people possess that I never even saw before. You love your husband, your already have the golden key.
2007-03-19 07:19:45 · answer #3 · answered by Maria A. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my relationship is stable and strong and i have the most intense passion for my husband and him for me after 11 years we hardly ever fight and when we do argue its over usually after like 15 minutes i mean it when i say i married my best friend i if given a choice would just hang out with my husband and so when it comes to sex we are still the try new things rip our clothing off in the living room when the kids are at grandmas house kinda people! We go dancing and have to watch it on the dance floor and make out in our car kinda passion going on so i don't think passion comes from instability it comes from the type of love you have for each other i still have lust for my husband and him for me i can see it when he looks at me and when he whispers in my ear things at the store or at the movies and there is nothing that is drama in our lives! so maybe its more the path you take in your marriage that makes passion stay or not
2007-03-19 07:38:55 · answer #4 · answered by peterpansdate 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Passion wanes after years of being together. i think that it's normal. I can say that I still have some pretty passionate sessions with the wife. Many times she turns into the aggressor which sends me through the ceiling because its so...so...well....passionate.
So I think that as time goes along, what we once took for granted now becomes something that you or your spouse/partner should work on. Its not that passion isn't there. Just takes alittle inventiveness and stimulation on each other's part to make sex out of this world. I can say this....afterwards if your legs are shaking, your body trembling and it takes you abit longer to catch your breath....then you've experienced passion.
2007-03-19 07:35:47 · answer #5 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stable relations can be passionate too. You have to learn to make love to a man in so many ways that each time is different though the man is same. It is not easy but it can be achieved. Good luck.
2007-03-19 08:53:58 · answer #6 · answered by bibus75 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You wouldn't believe the passion Disco Lady and I have for eachother.
Night fever baby!
12 years together and I love her in every way more and more each day.
I can't keep my hands off her. Our relationship is intense. I love her to death.
I know you don't like to hear it Lonely Wife, but your marriage lacks a lot more than passion.
2007-03-19 07:13:17 · answer #7 · answered by Disco Stu 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My relationship is stable, secure, we rarely fight and I know he's coming home when he says he will. And we are VERY passionate. I think it depends on the people involved.
2007-03-19 07:14:58 · answer #8 · answered by Lotus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not the only route to passion.
There's a book called 'the passionate marriage' you might find useful.
Basically, you and your husband may need to develop yourselves a little more independantly so that you can have that distinctness that lets you be attracted to each other. You don't need to fight to do it - it can just happen naturally for couples who do fight.
2007-03-19 07:34:07 · answer #9 · answered by kheserthorpe 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A good marriage is stable and passionate. You can have both, but lately it seems as though fewer and fewer people are finding both.
2007-03-19 07:15:07 · answer #10 · answered by QT 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋