is it wrong to want a baby?

Question

I want to have a baby and i am 16. I know i am young but i have this feeling like i should be having one and i really do want one. My cousins girlfriend has a baby and i had to take care of it and i dint want to give hime back. I dont know why but i feel that im ready. I have a well paying job and could afford it. Im about to move out of my moms house and me and a friend are going to become roomates. i know a guy who would be willing to help me out but then sometimes i doubt it just a little. very little but that little bit of doubt is making me ask for peoples advice so please help me.

Answer 1

At 16 you don't know what it is to be a parent. My mother was 17 and it made growing up very tough because as I was growing and maturing so was she.

At your age your most likely lacking some sort of emotional attachment. Whether it be your parents, or boyfriend. You're looking for that connection.

The wonderful things about babies and children is they depend on you and they are extremely loyal...so are dogs...try that first.

Just because you have a good job now doesn't mean it will always be there. What if they fire you or lay you off...how good is their insurance? Do they offer maternity leave? What happens when you work? Daycare? Do you understand how much daycare is a week? Most places for 1 child run about 150-200 for a cheap place. Are you in school? If not do you think that you will really advance and have a career w/o education.

Are you planning on college? Whos the father your friend? And hes ready to have the responsibilities of being a father and care taker?

Are you planning on getting state aid? If so thats not a good thing.

You are sooo young. Get an animal believe a cat or dog will love you unconditionally too...try that out when your 18 if you feel the same way well then reconsider...at least then you'll be out of high school (hopefully going to college) and will have money saved...what about your childs future...thinking about saving for retirement...

These questions may sound silly because your young and that stuff is many years away but what if you have to take a lower paying job, or your child gets really sick and needs a major surgery and you don't have good insurance, or you get a car and it breaks down (you will need a car) and when you thought you were going to use that money for savings all of a sudden you don't have it.

I know I sound like a mother but I saw my mother struggle...she ended up resenting me and my other siblings and turned out not so hot...

I grew up on food stamps and reduced school lunch...it wasent an exciting life like my mom thought it was going to be.

If you're plannin on getting a roommate and a new place see how that goes too...make sure you can afford that then do research on how much it is to have a child and see if you really can afford it or not.

Good Luck...

Answer 2

For a young woman to want to have a child is normal, but from your wording of the question, I must kindly say that you are not ready to have a child.

Having a child needs to be all about the child and not at all about you. You are thinking ahead of how to care a baby which is excellent and commendable, but while the situation may be 'doable' or 'manageable', is it the best possible scenario for the baby? Probably not.

The best thing that you can do to prepare for a baby is to finish school. If you are done, enroll in college. Keep working hard. Find an even better job. Get married.

Then, you will have a solid two parent home, a good job, an education to fall back on if you lose your job, and more years of experience and maturity that will give you wisdom to raise a child.

Use that desire to have a baby to motivate you to work hard and do more so that when the timing is right, you will be the best parent that you possibly can be.

Answer 3

Babysitting for a few hours is a lot different than 24 hours 7 days a week you are entirly to young have you finished high school. Where do you work to make that much money to afford at least $350 a month on childcare and everything else a baby needs. Maybe I should not have went to college and get a job with you. I am sure a couple guys would be willing to help you out with the making part but probably not the resposibility part. You should wait until you are stable and I really doubt your friend/roomamte wants to deal with an infant crying half the night at your age.

Answer 4

It is normal to want something that is so cute and cuddly. First of all, you can't count on a guy or any of your friends to help you because they are going to want to go out with their friends, not stay at home with you and take care of a crying baby. Are you ready to get up every 2-3 hours every night to feed and change the baby and then go to work? Are you ready to give up all the things that you want because your baby will need things? Are you ready to always stay home and stop going out with friends? Is your job a full time one with health insurance to cover the delivery and all medical issues? How much do you make in this well paying job, is it at least $20 an hour? If not, then you cannot afford to have a baby. Please think about it some more. Why don't you take care of a baby for a few days, day and night, and see what it is really like.

Answer 5

Please don't. You may think that you are ready but your really not. That baby you didn't have to take care of all night, not when it first came home. you can't have that good of a job at the age of 16. What about school? A baby is a life long responsibility and it never goes away. Wait until you are with a man that you love and he loves you, when your older and have a better job that the one you have now. I know that this is something that you don't want to hear right now but i promise you, if you wait to have a baby then you will be very thankful that you did.

Answer 6

i am also 16 i'll be 17 in 2 months and i have wanted a baby since i was like 14 but i alwasy sed i was going to wait until i graduate highschool. tomarrow i go back to the doctor to find out if i'm preggers!!! Me & my boyfriend broke up befor i even suspected i was pregnant we didn't really break up the last thing he said to me was bye baby i'll call you at 5 that was about 3 weeks ago He moved about 200 mi. away. i sugest that you wait until your with somebody that you love so your baby can have 2 parents, even though you could be a wonderful mother byyourself i know alot of women that had their babbies young and they all wish they would have waited. so you have a good job you can afford the baby how are you gonna spend time with it do you go to school? living with friends doesn't always work out i know from experiance you start to get on each others nerves. i would definately be sure that's what i wanted befor you did it and remembr having a baby istn't always fun they cry all the time wake you up your tired or you don't want to leave it and they are very expensive. i would wait if i were you. no matter what you decide best of luck and God bless you.

Answer 7

i know how you feel. i was 19 when i had my daughter. she is 7 months old. i love her to death. my boyfriend and i are still together and things are going great. we have our ups and downs but we work through everything. you are a little younger than i was, but i think that if everything you say is true you would be fine. i however think that you are better off waiting a few more years. wait until you have found the right guy that you want to be with. the one that you know would be a great father. do not settle for someone that says they may help. you cant rely on someone like this. you need to have a lot of support especially since you are so young. having a baby is a great experience, but very tough at the same time. from my experience so far. i wish i had waited til i was a little older, but i would not give her up for the world. all of the suffering and pain was worth it all. but if you can, wait a few more years. things wont be as hard for you if you wait.

Answer 8

Reach out and slap some sense into yourself. A lot of girls see a friend or relative with a baby and that baby is so darned cute, but you have NO clue how hard it is. Try this to cure your craving for a baby...

1. Set your alarm for every two hours 24 hrs a day and heat up a bottle. Spill that bottle down the front of you (this is to simulate a baby spitting up).

2. Slam your hand in a drawer a few times...this will simulate how sore and tired your body is from lack of sleep.

3. Offer to follow a neighbor dog around and clean up its poop (to simulate changing a baby)...don't forget to wipe it's butt really well so it won't get chaffed and then put some clothes on it.

Answer 9

It's out of the question! You are 16!!!-Enjoy being a teenager, I'm not doubting that you have a good job-for a 16year old, but get real, you have all the time in the world to have children, you are way too young right. Wait a while, enjoy life and I'm sure you will meet a great guy eventually that you will want to share a child with!

Answer 10

Even though you are only 16, it is natural to have those feelings. You are at a childbearing age, but you also have a lot of hormones going through your body. And those hormones are probably what make you feel like you want a baby. Also, who will take care of the baby while you're working? You have to think about that. And what country do you live in? In some countries, it will be illegal for a man to have sex with you at your age. You have to do a lot of planning ahead. Think about it for a while before you make your decision.