Advice on becoming a dad?

Question

I'm going to be a dad soon and im pretty excited but scared that i might not make enough to support it. any advice?

Answer 1

First of all, you might want to start refering to "it" as "my child". Congratulations! A baby is a blessing - a true gift from God!

Parenting is NOT about money - it's about unconditional love, quality time, sacrifice, and emotional / physical / psychological / spiritual support. What your child will need most is YOU. (What your wife will need most after the baby is born is your emotional support and your help with the baby.) If finances are truly a concern when it comes to providing physical needs (food, clothing, shelter), there are many resources available to help with this. WIC is WONDERFUL - they provide formula, juice and cereal during the child's first year, then milk, cheese, peanut butter, eggs, juice and cereal up to age 5 (or until income exceeds poverty level.) Also, infants don't NEED new, name-brand clothing - they outgrow their clothes VERY quickly - so whatever you don't receive from friends, relatives via baby-showers, you can get at yard sales / thrift stores! My daughter bought most of her daughter's clothing, infant bedding, etc at yard sales / flea markets and they were in "like-new" condition. If you are truly worried about not making enough money to support your child, then take a look at what you're spending that money on now and decide what you can sacrifice for your child. Every little bit helps.

As children get older, many parents think they are doing their child a favor by trying to "keep up with the Jones's" and giving their children everything they ask for / buying them expensive clothes, cell phones, computer games, etc. All they are doing is teaching their child to be self-centered and materialistic. OUR CHILDREN NEED OUR TIME and OUR UNCONDITIONAL LOVE more than anything else we can ever give them. As parents, we need to give our children room to make their own mistakes and learn from them, without making them feel condemned or unloved. Our youngest daughter got pregnant out of wedlock when she was 18 1/2, and she was afraid to tell us because she KNEW we would be hurt and disappointed, since that was not the way she was raised. BUT she also knew that we would still love her no matter what, and she knew that we would love the baby too. Being a parent is hard; being a GOOD parent is even harder!

Answer 2

Congratulations.
It is hard, that's all there is to it. There are a couple of really important things to remember. First, you and your partner are a team. As long as you two work as a team things will go a lot smoother for you. Second, it is very expensive but there are some things that you can do to burden the load with money. I know that formula companies let you sign up on their web sites then give you large coupons for about a year. Similac does that, I know for sure because I used it. Also, so does Huggies, although Huggies are really expensive anyway. The grocery store brands of diapers that are SO much cheaper work pretty well until your child is about 10 pounds under the recommended weight. So if your child weights 25 lbs and fits into size 3 or 4 then take the size 4 in the diaper. Once they reach a certain weight (maybe 25 lbs) those cheaper diapers just don't cut it like the more expensive ones. Also yard sales are full of baby things that people just don't need anymore and are perfect for you. Good luck to you, and I hope this helps you.

Answer 3

well if your wife is not already on WIC (women infants and children) then do that immidiatley, You dont know if you qualify unless you try. They give you all the formula the baby will need. The formula is the most expensive part of having a baby. Pampers and wipies will only cost you about 40 dollars a month if you buy inexpensive brands at walmart. And as for clothes, Dont even buy him/her any real pretty clothes, because for the first 5 months or so the only thing they wear is a sleeper, cause that makes them more comfortable. regarding clothes: sleepers, undershirts, socks, and your set, The dont need too many toys at a young age so dont bring home a bunch of stuffed animals it wont need for a while, If you keep it simple it wont cost much. One last bit of advice, help your wife during those midnight shifts with the baby, she'll appreciate it, and it gives you big time pointers.

Answer 4

You probably don't make enough...but who does? You're going to have enough surprises when the baby comes. For now, you should sit down with the baby's mother and work out a budget including any money/assistance you have coming in, and what your realistic expenses are going to be. Don't make the mistake of running up credit card bills with late-night runs to Wal-Mart for diapers and formula. The baby's needs need to come before your own, including that video game you might want, or a new pair of sneakers. It'll be tough, but as soon as you get into the swing of things, you'll be fine. Above all, spend time with your baby. It's the best gift you can give.

Answer 5

Just the obvious: you should have thought about the financial responsibility (among other things) before putting yourself in a position where you might become a dad.

Beyond that, the fact that you care is a good sign that you'll be able to do the right things. Just don't be afraid to ask for help whenever you need it from all of the sources available to you.

Good luck, guy.

Answer 6

Most likely it is not that you need to be worried about how much money you make, but rather figure out how much money you spend. Obviously, you need to make sure you have enough money to take care of paying your bills and buying food. After that, you need to figure out how much money you spend on other things that are not really necessities.

Don't forget to consider that the amount of money you spend on going out to eat or to the movies or things like that will likely decrease because you will spending more time at home with the baby instead. You can instead spend that money on caring for the baby.

Congratulations and good luck! I'm sure you can work it out. If necessary, you can always look for sources of additional income.

Answer 7

Work two jobs if you have to. Economize. Hope that you and the mother can work together for the good of the baby's future. Get married. Prepare for a big change in your life. Don't walk away because it is tough and you didn't expect it to be so dull, unexciting and boring - just a lot of work with a lot of love.

Answer 8

JUst be there for her. Help get up at night and feed the baby . MY husband would always get up with me to feed the baby and change the diaper. Even though he had to go to work at 6am. THat help me out alot

Answer 9

jsut work hard. and pray. God bless you for not being a dead beat dad. just love your baby and do the best you can do sometimes it will be hard and money will be tight but you can do it jsut keep your head high and remember that it's YOUR BABY your trying so hard for. Best of luck and gob bless

Answer 10

my husband was the same way our son is now 8 1/2 months old and hes got everything people make it sound worse than it is. relax be happy and enjoy your child. you will do fine. and congrats