1.I've not spoken to my close female friend for 4 months as we got to close.I told her that I wanted no contact so that I could get over my feelings for her. She only wanted to be friends.WE WERE NEVER A COUPLE
2.1 month ago she sent a txt saying the friendship is OVER and for me to get on with life.
3.A week later we met at a friends reunuion party,we spoke a lot but she looked hurt and uncomfortable. At the end of the night she hugged me tightly and said take care+we'll see each other on the group roadtrip.
4.Today I wrote her an email(via facebook,where we've emailed ech other a few times) asking if we're still friends(was confused as she said the friendship is over).
She wrote back saying:"Yes emailings great.Yes we are still friends. Yes, I'm very busy. Yes, I'm sure you are too xx"
5.Would she still be angry at me for taking a break from her???IS SHE STILL ANGRY WITH ME??IS SHE STILL HURT AFTER 4 MONTHS???
2007-03-19 00:46:43 · 9 answers · asked by sircrazydude90 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
How much time will it take?A year?
2007-03-19 00:58:25 · update #1
That was the only time I asked her if we're still friends!
2007-03-19 01:29:14 · update #2
She is seeing someone-which I'm happy for her,as she deserves to be happy!! :)
Have asked this as I'm confused by her saying we're not friends anymore and then she says we are!!! I've got 2 other girls which I fancy.
I don't fancy her anymore!!!We have many mutual friends-hence its impt to resolve this,1 way or another!
I don't intend on contacting her regularly at all--she still needs time to deal with her hurt!
2007-03-19 01:37:31 · update #3
Hi there,
At the end of the day you have to realise you hurt her by trying to cut the friendship off, because of your feelings . You may have thought it was the best thing for you both, but you were doing it to save your own pain, which is completely understandable....but you probably caused her pain in the outcome..because she did nothing wrong and yet you wanted to end the friendship..or take a "no contact" break. I am not blaming you because it is human instinct to protect ourselves from hurt, wether that be physcical or emotional...and I think that's the position your friend was in.
She was probably very angry and hurt by your actions when she sent that text saying it was over..because she felt let down to a certain extent and didn't want to be hurt like that. But then after she seen you at the party she probably realised she missed you a lot and thats why she hugged you and was so friendly.
I think it will take her a long time for her to forgive or to at least forget what happened and you can't blame her for being a bit distant...she is protecting herself from future hurt, incase you did it again...and even though you probably won't ..she has no guarentee really...so she's taking it slow and you will have to appreciate that.
I don't want you to feel like i am making you out to be a criminal and like you have done something terrible, but she's doing what you were doing at the start of all this...protecting herself from more emotional pain and you will have to gain her trust again to make her feel she can be your friend properly again.
I hope this helps, best of luck and i hope things work out.
2007-03-19 02:20:11 · answer #1 · answered by SH2007 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
bit of a reverse situation but i had a clse male friend and we fell out cus he was bein real mean about my new other half. we've just started getting back in contact again, and he's apologised for bein nasty to my partner. but yeah i was hurt for ages, longer than 4 months - everytime u think of that person u think of the bad things associated with them and your last conversation - if thats bad then memories are gonna be bad.
a simple sorry goes a long way...! just try and meet up, face to face is so much better than emailing. just go for a walk or go for coffee or a drink. dont keep asking if u r still friends thou, if she's said yes then asking again will annoy her - hence probably a bit stroppy email. its gotta be worth a go, ur friendship isnt worth sacrificing over a misunderstanding.
hope it works out x
2007-03-19 08:10:04 · answer #2 · answered by boo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is obvious that you and your friend differ in the way you control your feelings. whilst for you, the easiest way for you to cope with how you felt was to get some distance, she probably didn't understand why you were doing this.
when she texted you saying the friendship was over, she was still hurt after you calling things off with her. she probably just needed some time to come to terms with what you said to her.
it seems as if she wants to give things another go. i think you guys have a lot of talking to do. girls like guys to be honest with them. this is probably why she was so upste in the first place - she was confused as to why you wanted to stop being friends with her. just talk to her, and listen to her. if you two really are good friends, then you will get over this.
it is difficult sometimes having girl-guy friendships without feelings getting in the way, but if it is a strong friendship, and if you respect each other and don't try to hide things from each other, then your friendship will survive and be even strogner than ever.
good luck! :)
2007-03-19 07:59:07 · answer #3 · answered by vansiepurple 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is very silly, you both clearly have had or have feelings for each other. And you both seem very confused about the whole thing. If it were me I would arrange to meet up somewhere quiet and have the whole thing out, if you both can lay your cards on the table about how you feel and have felt in the past, you will be able to move on friends or no friends and im sure you will feel much better.
2007-03-19 07:53:53 · answer #4 · answered by agent flora 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Calm down!!
I think she may be hurt, maybe she has feelings for you to!! Maybe she felt like you was pushing her away! seems liike you hurt her feelings and made her feel like you didnt want her around anymore.
Maybe you should talk to her tell her you still want to be close friends make her realise you still want her around.
All the best xx
2007-03-19 07:55:04 · answer #5 · answered by Elektra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Angry yes but looks like she's prepared to give it a go in time.
I know you said girls answer but my sister told me to write this.
2007-03-19 07:55:08 · answer #6 · answered by Tom S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no if she had sence she would let u breath and take time out.
trust me i have had problems with my relationship and i think its best now to just stay friends and if she doesnt like that then she should grow up, give you some space and learn how to deal with things like this! then when she finally realises she will want to be friends with you again./
trust mke it works xx..xx..xx..xx..xx
2007-03-19 07:57:22 · answer #7 · answered by xoxoxsxci sash xoxoxox 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's your fault,you didn't handle that the right way. I'd be pissed! if I were her. Maybe a year! Bye you fool
2007-03-19 08:21:05 · answer #8 · answered by sandeespacecase 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She fancys you so do something about it
2007-03-19 07:58:48 · answer #9 · answered by suzy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋