good marriages wives and husbands?

Question

I posted and asked a question earlier about good wives it was not read through by most those that did say the following most often "we both have to work, no time for a relationship, we just never can have this time together" I find this disheartening and want some ideas how to free up a two income family for more relationship time this is a tall order I know but think you had time for this when you were dating why not now that you are commited has it really changed that much one thing I say is you should be married at least a year before trying to have a kid so you can enjoy each others company before you get a family involved.

ok to clarify something I am not married but I always find time for girlfriends no matter what. I find it so disheartening alot of women are saying there is no time after marriage is my concern, but yes men are not taking time as well.

Answer 1

You're right. This is tough. I have a two income marriage myself, with two kids under age 3. I don't know what type jobs you and yours hold, but if they are aligned right, such as you both work during the day, then you can make time for relationship time. You'll likely find that it's the little things that you do together that matter most. An example would be where rather than both of us sleeping in and going straight to work, we get up an hour before we have to get ready to leave. That way, we always have a hour in the mornings before time to get ready and before kids get up. We may do nothing more than have a coffee or two with some conversation, but it's "us" time that we just manufactured into the day. Sure, it's not us going out and doing something big, but it's still time for us. I don't know if anything close to that would work for you, but you get the idea.

As for time before marriage when we both had jobs then too, sure, we had more. Everyone does I think. But, then it was because we stayed up later and slept less than we should've. It sounds tough, but you really do just have to "make" time to spend together no matter how you spend it, you need to have "us" time. Before kids, it's a lot easier to do this. After kids, wow, then it becomes very tough to do, but if you have family nearby, a Saturday night babysitter for a few hours is great and the hour early in the mornings may have to suffice for a period of 5/6 years until the kids are not so small, but in the end it's worth it.

This may or may not be what you were looking for, but I hope it helps.

Answer 2

Everyone can make some quality time for their family no matter how busy they are during the day. I grew up in a home where both parents worked and we still had dinner together as a family several nights a week. Also, my parents would have a date night where they went out without us. I think all couples can at least do that to keep their relationship happy and close. Even if it's only on weekends, take some time while running errands to do something fun together. It may only be an hour but it's a start.If your career and everything else in life is coming first before your family or relationship, you know you are in trouble.

Answer 3

If your communication skills with your wife aren't better than they are here, she'll want to work over-time just to get away. It's not easy to understand what idea exactly you are trying to convey... LOL
Don't let this discourage you though as it is clear that your desire to be with and spend quality time with you wife is there and most commendable. You have the right stuff if you already know that much. Now sit and discuss this with her and together, you should be able to work out some schedule where you still can have some good times together. Just make the time count when you are together. One good what to begin to do that, is to learn to live in the "now" moment. Don't look back at all the times you missed out on but enjoy the minutes that you are together.

Answer 4

You have to consciously make time for it. It is easy to get wrapped up in every day life and take each other for granted. Especially if your children are young. They take up most of your time and your energy and if you both work that leaves even less time and energy. I'm a SAHM now, but I did work before we had children and when my children were little (1 and 3 until they were 2 & 4 because we moved and it made more sense for me to stay home with them). We would have family time and mommy/daddy time (that's another reason to have your kids on a good bedtime schedule, it give the adults time to be together without the kids inturupting all the time). My husband and I would get a sitter every couple of weeks and just be together. Even if we just sat on the couch and watched T.V. together with no kids, it helped keep us refreshed during the times we really didn't have time. But you have to plan for that and you have to have a trusted person willing to take your kids for a day.
I plan on going to school when my youngest starts school next year and getting a job, so we'll have to do that again.
Although even as a stay at home mom. My husband still works a lot and we still have to make time for each other. As our kids have gotten older it has gotten easier to some degree, except now we have more to do with them during the day, like sports. But night time and morning time are our time and we also have a date night.

Answer 5

When you're in a relationship, I believe both party should have alloted time for each other.
If one managed to allot time during a girlfriend/boyfriend period, how much more when your married?
Marriage is not the end of the relationship, rather its only the beginning. So I think when your into it you should give it a more quality time in order for it to grow.
yes, I agree with you that the moment you get married, you don't need to rush to have kids around. give atleast a year or two for you and your husband/wife to spend time alone with each other.
Even during those busy days, and work demands more of your time than at home, even in just a littlest moment or minute, try to get in touch with your 'starting family'
An hour together in breakfast is good since both of you are not tired... If one would say that they are in rush to go to work in the morning, give atleast a little effort to wake up earlier to show each other you wanted some time alone.
it even removed stress to be with your love one, a hug and kiss brightens the day.
good marriage requires sacrifice and effort, so time is important for it to work until the end.

Answer 6

During my 44 years of marriage, many times both have worked outside the home, but we adapted and overcame any problems that arose. We are still together enjoying our 5 grandchildren.

Answer 7

YOu need to MAKE time. If you care enough about your family and marraige, then you will make the time. Don't let making money get in the way. It reflects on your children, (if you have them). In any case, your home life should ALWAYS come before work!

Answer 8

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