I am 43 and my husband 55,married 3 years,both never married before,and I dont want kid but he wants,what should I do. because he wants me to do test tube but I dont like at all,he said if not he will divorce me ,he thinks not kid is no hope no future.
2007-03-18 20:17:00 · 25 answers · asked by Carol H 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Tell him he should have thought about that about 25 years ago. If he thinks you need to reproduce for him at your age, he is being completely selfish and unreasonable. He is in a sad situation for sure, but it's not your fault. If he loves you, he will realize that his time may have already past. He may be too late to do anything about it.
2007-03-18 20:24:58 · answer #1 · answered by papaz71 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Didn't you discuss having a family or not before you were married? My husband and I are the the same age but I only told him I didn't want anymore kids because I had a son when I was a teenager that he adopted right after we got married. But I changed my mind when I realized what kind of a Father he would be. But if you can't have kids or if youv'e made up your mind for sure, then maybe you should try another angle and remind him of how old he will be when your child is a pre-teen and will demand his time the most. When he gets to retire and look forward to relaxing he can forget it, cause there is boyscouts or girlscouts and sporting events and friends and driving them all over the place and homework to help with. Just talking about that makes me tired all over again! Maybe he is just trying to make sure that his age isn't the reason you don't want to have kids. Maybe he thinks your just saying that to make him feel better. Either way you two need to sit down and talk again. Because if he's serious about divorce let him walk! But maybe think about a foster child who hasn't got a loving parent! Best of Luck!
2007-03-18 20:41:32 · answer #2 · answered by lilrunaway45 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that it's not a good idea to have first kid at 55/56. You two won't be able to take care of the kid at this age. Also, it might be a dangerous deal for you to mother a baby at this age. Tell him having a kid at this age would be a horrified future.
2007-03-18 20:22:23 · answer #3 · answered by Subhendu S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
who taking the risk here.why the test tube. got a aunt she got married at 37 and now she 65 no kids there still together.hubby wants kids to hold you together no way.dont do something you will reguet.when your child is 10 you will be 53 and he will be 65. you have had hope, and future for three yrs.and no kids. no way would a family now. good luck.
2007-03-18 21:03:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a serious matter you should have discussed before you got married.
You should put points down on a paper about why don't want kids and you should show them to your husband, maybe if he sees your concern is based on something concrete like fears or needs, then he would either talk you out of those fears or needs you have and reassure you or he will agree with you on not having kids.
You should discuss that very patiently with him as soon as possible
2007-03-18 20:22:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its normal for a 55 married man to have kid of his own.
Its normal too for a 43 married lady don't want kid of her own.
Maybe if you agreed and do it coz love , a cute baby will upshine your life and you boths ain't be lonely together again.
2007-03-18 20:37:10 · answer #6 · answered by laziifrog 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can't believe you didn't discuss this issue before you married. I think a divorce would be the better alternative. Every child deserves two loving parents.
2007-03-18 20:21:51 · answer #7 · answered by starflower 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm 51 with a 4 year old and love the hell out of him I think you would feel different if you ever had one but if your not up to it maybe you should let him go so he can fulfill his dream . Some people aren't cut out to have kids .
2007-03-18 20:35:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try adoption instead. Like Angelina Jolie she adopted a Vietnamese kid. Maybe you can try for a Caucasian kid. Hope that helps.
2007-03-18 20:23:11 · answer #9 · answered by Ashley 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what an ***. at 55 he wants a baby? he'll most likely never live to see the kid graduate, now that's fair to the kid. not.
he should have gotten busy years ago. tell him the baby store is closed and to shop elsewhere.
2007-03-18 20:31:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋