What do you think of this?

Question

That Damn Cold Pillow by Tiffany Bryant



Here I am again.



Another email I know will go unread and unanswered.



Yet I still sit here and type as if you will read this and think of me.



I had such a bad day today and needed to talk to someone.



I found myself thinking of only you.



Hair the color of the morning sun and eyes I so easily get lost in.



Memories of how easily you make me smile flood my thoughts,



bringing back that smile only you can make, onto my lips.



Lips longing to feel the soft warmth of yours.









I dreamt about you last night.



And wokeup happier than I've been in months.



We were wrapped around each other,our legs intertwined.



You swept back my hair and told me how beautiful I was.



Took a trip through each others eyes so long Im sure I saw your soul.



Longing for mine like a lost child for it's mother.



I gave in easily and found my way in, never looking back but to



say goodbye to an emptiness I never realized was there until you.







My head on your bare chest felt so natural, fit so perfectly.



Your lips on mine like it's the only thing they were ever meant for.







I woke up to a cold pillow and a tear on my cheek.



I could still feel your skin on mine.



Your breath down my neck.



The way your hands felt on my breasts.





Heartbroken it wasnt real.



My head back on the pillow.



My fingers running across my lips trying to hold onto the last bit of you



before it crept away with the early morning dew.

Answer 1

I'm sure your boyfriend will love it.

I especially liked the rhyme at the very end (snuck up on me).

I like the bit of confusion with "And wokeup happier than I 've been in months" and "I woke up to a cold pillow..." as they both refer to the same dream and the juxtaposition of the happiness and the tear.

You may wish to remove the period "I saw your soul. / Longing" otherwise the "Longing" line doesn't make sense.

Also, go ahead and remove the extra spaces in between lines.

Very enjoyable read. I read it as a persona piece.

Answer 2

Absolutely beautiful! I hope you keep writing.

Answer 3

its really nice, wonderful

Answer 4

please



kill



me...