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my lil sister Raychel is 14 (i'm 30) & she's in the 8th grade. She just found out that she is pregnant with twins . She plans to keep them & try to raise them on her own. How can I help other than being there for her & hand me downs from my kids. I'm a stay home mom so I'm willing to babysit so she can finish school,etc. Raychel was also asking for name ideas. Does any one have any?

2007-03-18 17:12:37 · 22 answers · asked by Chezney 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting Adolescent

22 answers

Hello,first of all I think that you're on the right path.Just your presence alone and support should be enough to get little sis through this,but it's also important to let Raychel know this is going to be a rough road ahead of her.Now as a single parent myself although my daughter father is around it's still hard on me and I'm 31.Not that much older than you.She said she wants to try and raise these babies on her own?.That's going to be rough considering she's only 14.I don't want to put her down because I don't know her,but instead of asking for baby names how about you talk to her about birth control for after the little one's are here.This is not going to be a easy road for her to go down,it's very important that your sister finish school and go to college if possible.It's important for her to know that she's no longer #1 it's all about the kids now.Remind her that she can still do whatever she wants far as carrer goals,she's just going to haf to work extra hard.Nothing is impossble,nothing constantly remind her of these things.When these babies get here and start crying at night who's going to get up with them?She's going to be tired as hell trying to go to school and be a mom.But encouragement is a good thing.It's not going to be easy at all.Where is the father?And I don't mean any harm God knows I don't but what does mom and dad haf to say about this?God bless you and Raychel and the babies,and tell her to try hard and focus and take care of herself meaning her body as well you only get one life as well tell her to make the best of it.Good luck.

2007-03-19 14:44:46 · answer #1 · answered by dccuttie75 6 · 0 0

You are an awesome sister to help out with this. I know it seems like a disaster, but the Lord has a reason for everything. Those two lives were meant to be. Kudos to your lil sis for being responsible enough to accept the consequences.

As far as helping, she will need a babysitter, hand me downs, and love, support, and nurturing. I'm sure she will benefit from your parental expertise as well. She's going to have a LOT of sleepless nights with two though, I'm assuming she still lives with your parents since she's not yet 18.

The good news is that she doesn't even have to go to school physically now if she doesn't want to. Most high schools have an online/internet option that would allow her to work at her own pace...or if you are a stay at home parent, you can actually take charge of "homeschooling" her so that she has more time with the babies, and will also have time to get a part time job. College is also available online.

More than anything, she needs to be able to talk about how she's feeling, without being judged, and it seems as though you will be able to help out with that. xo Anna

2007-03-18 17:43:22 · answer #2 · answered by ~♥Anna♥~ 5 · 2 0

Wow. This is going to be difficult for her (and for you). I hope she acts responsible and I hope she doesn't have a nervous breakdown. The most you can do for her is help her out right now- day by day and teach her everything you know about children. Help her see the importance in attending new mom classes and maybe even money budgeting classes. She will work, right? Help her stay in school. She will probably want to quit after she has the babies (or even during her pregnancy) and make SURE she gets on some sort of birth control after the births.
cute names for the babies: I'm not sure of your heritage, etc..so I'm not sure we will have the same taste in names.
GIRLS:
1. Gabriella Kennedy
2. Adriana Nicole
3. Addyson Gabriella
4. Alexys Nicole
5. Ava
6. Jaclyn
7. Jaelyn Adriana ??

BOYS:
1. Ziah Alexander
2. Ziah Anthony
3. Anthony Issac
4. Elijah Anthony
5. Adrian Alexander Those are some of my favorites!!

2007-03-18 19:16:38 · answer #3 · answered by deperate mom 1 · 1 0

Oh Raychel is fortunate to be your sister. How nice that you will help her. Names how about Adam or Aaron for a boy and Angel or Anna for a girl.

2007-03-18 17:54:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

hey. you know i think your sister may be able to make this work. everyone in my family has had children extremely young and has handled it. my sister is 22 and has a 1 year old but is still going to uni(college) and she lives 10 hours away from me and my family. it may be hard and i am 14 and i can't imagine having kids right now but i think she will be okay because everyone finds a way to cope and when you look back at things you think how did i mange to do all that but when things need to be done you do do them no matter how hard it is. maybe you should let your sister look after your kids for a while so she can start knowing how to handle them but everyone else reply are good.

2007-03-18 18:34:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

Don't forget prayer and lots of it. You all are going to need the Lord, your Rock to help you through all of this.

She is so young. Poor dear! But bless her courage (or naiveness) to keep the babies and raise them, the best she can of course. And bless you for being there by her side.

Perhaps there are some parenting classes that you two can attend together to prepare her in advance so she doesn't end up feeling so overwhelmed? Check with your local BIRTHRIGHT chapter and seek their assistance. perhaps you can get plugged into a local church family that will have some eager moms who's children have recently left for college and they would love to help you guys out from time to time with sitting and even throwing a sweet baby shower with donated baby items.

Research some good movies that show good parenting in action. Have her watch 911 Nanny and discuss the wonderful parenting techniques that you observe on there.

Maybe find some easy to read parenting pamphlets and go ahead and order a subscription to a Parenting magazine (Get one for yourself too so the two of you can discuss the current month's articles). Big books might be a bit intimidating right now, so i would keep the literature on the simple side until you feel her out with everything.

Ummmm... I'm still thinking. I might come back to add some more.

Help her prepare meal plans for herself so she can be as healthy and fit as possible during her pregnancy. Keep checking with her to ensure she is taking her prenatals. Prepare her GENTLY, in advance for all of the changes she is going to face with her body.

PS My mom got pregnant with me at 15 and had me at 16. She and my father are still together after 38 years and ummm... my point is, this can work. It might not be the best case scenario, but this can work and those babies will one day have you and their sweet mommy to thank for it.

2007-03-18 17:25:05 · answer #6 · answered by NONAME 4 · 2 1

She'd be better off getting married to a 20 year old who will provide for her but since that is illegal in the USA she's stuck with raising the kids on her own. But maybe it will teach her not to have sex again.

2007-03-19 07:24:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Well, I have twins, am married and had the man in my life, and it was very hard. Twins are not easy. I hope she is mature enough for children, which at 14, you ARE a child yourself. I have boy/girl twins, Elizabeth and Elijah. Depending on her taste, and what they are, youll have to go from there with picking names.

2007-03-18 17:20:06 · answer #8 · answered by Bl3ss3dw1thL1f3 4 · 0 0

14 yrs. old, pregnant and twins, i think she needs all the help that she can get and i hope she is appreciative and happy to have such a very nice sister like you who is ready, willing and able to help. i hope she finish her schoolling and then some for the sake of the coming twins. i would suggest that she name one of the twins after you for being such a nice and helpful sister. you are one in a million!!!wish everyone have a sister like you!

2007-03-18 17:29:17 · answer #9 · answered by livinhapi 6 · 2 0

that is a really rough situation and some ways that you can be there for her besides the ones that you already mentioned are to help her schedule her baby appointments at or near your pediatricians office so she can take her babies too. maybe take her to get on assistance and after she has the babies make sure she goes to get on birth control as soon as possible!!!! the last thing she needs is to get pregnant again also dont let her give up on this and help her go through the steps to get support from the father no matter what he tries to say or his parents. You sound like a wonderful sister and she is lucky to have you. and only one idea for the names please dont make them rhyme. that is evil

2007-03-18 17:19:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

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