Everytime i get on the internet it seems that we have no hope.we are only young and seem like everytime we turn on the t.v,listern to the radio,watch a movie or read a book or mag,no matter how hard were gonna try, were gonna end up devorced,unhappy and alone..i know that not EVERYONE is like this but were at a higher risk cause were young...Has anyone known of a couple who have honestly never cheated,lied,had an affair or whated to leave each other...? Is there any hope for young couples there days?
2007-03-18 16:23:33 · 14 answers · asked by lilly_bud 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My husband and I married young...and we are still together right now...
I think that you need not expect perfection in your marriage...because things like that could happen...we are only human....
I mean, those aren't good things...and they are things you don't want to happen...because they make marriage harder...
But, if you really want it, then you can fight tooth and nail to make your marriage work...
Marriage is about forgiving...that doesn't mean you should run over eachother, but you should know that there will be mistakes made...
I don't think that marriage is easy at all, but it is worth the fight....I love marriage...and there have been some pretty rough times, but we have made it through them...
My husband suggested that we go to counseling...and his fight has kept us together....
But, I fight for it also...and those things have kept us together...
So, if two people want it truly...it will work out...
Marriage counseling is good even when you don't have issues that are breaking you apart...
it helps you to rediscover love and know eachother better....
So, just do some premarital counseling...but if you want it you go for it for yourself...don't worry about other people...
Because when you have to work it out..."other people" won't be there...and they won't be there if you miss out on your life's love...because of "other people"...so go for your gutt....do what you feel is best for your life...
marriage is about being committed...not about age....
2007-03-18 16:37:33 · answer #1 · answered by LIFECOACH 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I got married when I was 18 and my husband was 21. We've been married for ten years now and have two kids, and we're more in love than ever. There have been some rough patches, because we've had money issues and that seems to spill over into the rest of the relationship, but we've always worked through them and ended up with a stronger relationship afterwards. Neither of us has ever cheated...sometimes we will fantasize about it but it's not like we're really going to do it, just something to talk about to spice up our sex life.
I know the statistics make it sound like all marriages are doomed. Movies and books talk more about divorce than marriage too...but that's because a happily married couple working hard and raising a family doesn't make a very interesting story, there's not enough drama for a movie or book.
You have to ask yourselves if you have what it takes to make the marriage work. You will have arguments...all married couples do...and the birth of a child always puts a lot of stress on a relationship...but you have to ask yourself if you love your partner enough to sit there and work things out when you argue, or if you're going to just pack up the baby and walk away. If you both feel like you're ready for marriage, if you both have a strong belief that your child should be raised with both parents in the home, then you should go ahead and get married. It's better to try something and fail at it than to never try at all because you're afraid of failure...besides, when you hear a statistic like 75% of all young marriages end in divorce, or something like that, you forget that the other 25% are still happily married...just plan on being part of that percentage :-)
Good luck and congrats on your baby!
2007-03-18 23:36:16 · answer #2 · answered by Judi 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on how fast you two grow up... and boy it sounds like you two have a lot of growing up to do!!!! Plus what makes you think if you don't get married that you are not going to experience a lot of heartache when you two break up? Yes there are people who never cheated/lied, however most everyone for a fleeting second has wanted a breather, it doesn't mean they take it. Personally I think you two should have a quiet ceremony and start living your lives right for once AND learn how to use birth control properly.
2007-03-18 23:33:54 · answer #3 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dearest Lily - There is one main ingredient to success in marriage. Respect for the other person is something you both should strive for- daily. Sometimes you have to work on it . At the same time, make sure you are acting in such a way that he will always have respect for you. Knowing all the facts - TV, experience, books, magazines can help by pointing out potential pitfalls. So pledge this to yourself......when you see red flags in your relationship, don't ignore them - salute them. Call them out - put them on the carpet and talk them through. Best of luck to you. And happy labor.........it's less than a week away !
2007-03-18 23:39:06 · answer #4 · answered by janni 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, if you're asking yourself that question, your relationship may already have issues, because you are more concerned about what might happen rather than the fact that you two are together right now. Trust me, as a child who's parents divorced very early on, I can say I didn't really care so much that my parents weren't together. They love me very much, and that's EndGame to me. Think of your baby, and what is best for it. Are you two happy? Or are you not. All other things aside. That is what you should be concerned with.
2007-03-18 23:34:59 · answer #5 · answered by Max 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It truly depends on how strong the love is that you and your mate have.
Statistics don't necessarily relate to YOU and YOUR relationship. You must determine exactly what it is you would like to happen with your relationship.
If you both agree that marriage is the next step, then you must create a game plan to make it work.
Anything worth having, you work at constantly. Just love each other, listen to each other...respect each other.
PEACE.
2007-03-18 23:39:37 · answer #6 · answered by Talkstress 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to look for the positives in your relationship & forgive the pitfalls as everyone has some short-commings, no one is perfact except the LORD Almighty. try to appriciate eachother. I am married for the last ten years & can swear on the behalf of my wife & my ownself that we did'nt cheat eachother, never leid that could affect our relation,trust. he reason is we care for the good things of eachothe r& let go the bad ones.
2007-03-18 23:51:38 · answer #7 · answered by lovelyhubby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course there is hope. No guarentees, but hope!
Many couples have been together for many many years. You see them in newspapers at their 50th wedding anniversaries.
Go talk to a couple you know who have been married over 40 years. ASK what kept them in love and together.
2007-03-18 23:44:00 · answer #8 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget everyone else, if you want to be together, do it. Give yourself, him and the baby a chance at having a happy healthy live.
There is hope. You have to love, forgive, trust and forgive. Whatever works for you is what you will have to do.
2007-03-18 23:53:19 · answer #9 · answered by Rocka 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be bothered of what people think and I guess you need to make your life decisions right. Like what do you think is important to you right now? Career, husband to be, baby? Just ask yourself these questions. Are you ready for it? Any financial support? Can it be maintained? Take your time to think of these and maybe you will know.
2007-03-18 23:29:34 · answer #10 · answered by Ashley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋