I do the same thing, and I know that the reason (at least in my case) is the way I was raised. I was raised that the mother is the CAREgiver and I feel bad if I am giving anything other than care. I feel like I've let my family down by doing things that really do need to be done. You're putting everyone else's feelings before yours, and being regretful of your feelings and actions when they are reasonable is a sign that your feelings are being bottled up, and it's possibly damaging your self-esteem, also. I recommend taking time just for you to sit - not read, or listen to music, or anything - just sit and be quiet. When you take time for you, your bottled up feeling will start to show, and you'll be more effective to everyone once you get this pattern established, and you will feel better about your life and these troubling problems. Best of Luck!
2007-03-18 15:49:11
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answer #1
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answered by jhostman 3
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Uhm, you need to learn to control your anger. While it may be normal for all men and women to experience feelings of guilt, yours seems to be excessive and only because you do and say things that you know you shouldn't ie. 'bad things' to your husband. I don't know exactly how you scold your child, but you could be abusing your power and letting your anger take over instead of doing it simply out of diciplinary need.
What can you do to control your anger? Wait, think things through. When you're upset with your husband or child, take a few seconds or minutes to breath and confront the issue with your mind not your emotions. Possibly invest in an anger management course or read some self help!
2007-03-18 22:50:22
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answer #2
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answered by Anonymous
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Yes, it's natural. But, if it's hard for you to forgive yourself - after they have forgiven you, then you need to talk to your doctor. I used to have a hard time with guilt and realized I had depression (I thought it was PMS - which it may have been mixed with depression and peri-menopause). Hopefully your doctor will refer you to a psychiatrist or prescribe some anti-depressant medication for you. Of course, when you begin taking that medicine, report any unusual (besides those listed) side-effects. If you have any severe side effects, your doctor will change the prescription (if he is a good doctor and cares for your well being instead of just money) that will work better for you. You might consider asking your gynecologist, it's probably a hormonal problem. My gyn prescribed some for me and I've done better. I'm now going through menopause (started because of chemo) and haven't experienced "extreme" depression like I used to. Hope that helps. I'm sorry if I wrote too much...
2007-03-18 23:05:27
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answer #3
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answered by DotRMe 2
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Wow, don't sweat the small stuff. Pick your battles but win your wars. Whenever you feel the need to criticize someone try to sandwich it with a complement then your constructive criticism, then with another complement. People will be a little more receptive to you and you will have made your point without hurting any ones feelings and no regrets on your part.
2007-03-18 22:50:11
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answer #4
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answered by TREX 3
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It is Normal for everyone to get Angry from time to time. It is good that you have a Conscience for getting angry especially if you were very rude and uncontrollable. Before you speak out of anger, Stop, Think and count to ten. This does help to calm you down some. Be very careful what you say to your child or around your child. You are shaping him/her for Adulthood.
2007-03-18 22:48:24
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answer #5
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answered by donna_honeycutt47 6
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Please consider very strongly getting into counseling for yourself on this asap. Also, possible anger management class as well. Why? Yes, it's okay to get angry, it's what you do when angry that can cause problems. You could be being verbally abusinve to your hubby and child. The scars for that are on their hearts, not physical. Please stop doing that NOW! How? By when you get angry with them, shut up, go in your bedroom by yourself, and think about doing what you need to to calm yourself down. Practice saying only nice things to them, not mean, angry, bad things. And, as I said earlier, please get into counseling for yourself, ASAP! Take care.
2007-03-18 22:51:51
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answer #6
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answered by SAK 6
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I know what you're saying. Both sexes do these things. It's normal. We speak first, b/f thinking. Just make it a point to think first w/o having a kneejerk reaction to get upset. I know easier said than done. I've got the same problem.
2007-03-18 22:51:01
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answer #7
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answered by bigdaddy 2
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Yes. Everyone feels that way. It's human nature.
If you DIDN'T feel remorseful later, that would be weird and maybe even a little evil.
You are normal. Don't worry.
2007-03-18 22:45:11
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answer #8
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answered by Molly 6
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yes i say bad things to my husband 95 more times than he ever does to me, we females are bitchy-i hate that about myself but we can go to God for help, i do.
2007-03-18 22:49:38
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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I think you may need anger management. It worked for me.
2007-03-18 22:46:52
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answer #10
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answered by elnino4 1
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