Me and my bestie have known each other for almost 12 years!! We've have been besties for one year!! Ever since I was raped because she was the only one there for me!! But lately we've been falling farther and farther apart!! i don't want to lose her as a friend but thats what I think is going to happen!! Ever since she got a new boyfriend it seems like he is more important that me!! WHAT DO I DO???
2007-03-18 14:44:58 · 23 answers · asked by Preggo 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
you're not falling apart. don't feel discouraged. your friend just wants to spend time with her new boyfriend, that's all. you're still her best friend. leave her alone when she's with him. to cement your relationship, try setting up specific times and dates to hang out "boyfriend free". tell her that you respect her and her boyfriend, but you'll always be there if she needs you.
2007-03-18 14:53:13 · answer #1 · answered by Val 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This can happen to guys as well. Boyfriends/girlfriends can easily make a long lasting friendship fall apart, unfortunately.
The best thing that can be done is to play along with the game and see what happens. Just don't make your friend think you are jealous or anything. The truth will come in time.
2007-03-18 14:51:40 · answer #2 · answered by saikojay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I am sorry about your rape.
Friends often fall away. It seems like friends are there for a season. When we need someone, like with your situation, soemone comes into your life exactly when you need them.
Some friends last a lifetime, but often there are times when you go without seeing or talking for weeks or months on end, but you know that they are there for you and you for them.
Sometimes when dating a new person, you become so interested in that person and the excitement of the relationship that you let friendships slide.
She still is your bestie, she just has her mind on other things right now.
2007-03-18 14:49:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would try talking with her about it and telling her how you feel. Sometimes best friends do grow apart but 12 years is a long time to break it off now. Just remember, she probably won't always be with that guy and you'll be there for her when she breaks up. Remind her of this in a nice way and plan a girls night out. Good luck.
2007-03-18 14:49:13 · answer #4 · answered by jamie kat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The heart is large enough to share love for more than one person. Know that she still cares for you but having a boyfriend kind of takes her mind off her relationship with you.
Find a hobby or volunteer somewhere to help fill the empty hours.
She's still your friend but needs some space to be with the bf. And maybe you'll find someone too.
2007-03-18 14:48:27 · answer #5 · answered by Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing you can do. I'm sorry.
Sadly, some friendships have a life cycle and yours appears to be approaching its end. All you can do is let her know how you feel (i.e., "I feel like we're growing more distant and it bugs me").
This does tend to happen when someone gets loopy for a new (male/female/hermaphrodite/ abnormally obliging pekingese). Some people flush all their friends and go deeply into loopyland. Friendship is not a one time choice; it's a daily choice and it takes some effort.
Good luck.
2007-03-18 14:50:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well usually when someone gets a boyfriend or girlfriend they generally spend most of their time with them. Other people don't like it because he or she isnt spending time with other people but just ask her why not hang out more with you. Or i don't know how u feel about getting a boyfriend yourself since you said you were raped but you can ask her if her boyfriend has a friend and you guys can double date and that way you can still hang out with her?
2007-03-18 14:50:17 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
try to find more ways to spend time with her. you might have to include her bf sometimes...especially if the relationship is new. you could tell her how you feel that the two of you are growing apart.
keep in mind that relationships grow and change and do fall apart sometimes. people come into your life for a reason, and often when they serve their purpose, they move on or you move on. it's sad, but when you move on you open yourself to new and wonderful people.
2007-03-18 14:59:05 · answer #8 · answered by somegirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because she doesn't have as much time for you doesn't mean you're not best friends anymore. When you call her ask about her boyfriend and if she's happy, etc and she will know you care about her. When they break up...and they probably will if they're young...then you will be there for her to pick up the pieces.
2007-03-18 14:51:12 · answer #9 · answered by DeborahDel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her how u feel....she should understand if she is ur best friend
i have the smae problem with the best friendi have known all my life
sometime in new places, with new people....u kinda go different ways
and that is why u need to learn to be urself a make other friends
i am not saying to totally ignore ur friend but u can ocasionally talk
(make new friends, or tell her how u feel)
2007-03-18 14:49:52 · answer #10 · answered by Me 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋