Whats it like to be a single mother to a newborn?

Question

for women on thier own and everythign?? please let me know details if u can thanks:)

Answer 1

I have been a single mother of two boys who are currently 2 and 4 now. I got no child support, the father isn't around, and all I had was what I worked my *ss off to do. It can be fun, yet exhausting. Parenthood is very tricky with emotions, especially when they get older and you wish you could have done more when they were younger. As long as you spend QUALITY TIME, NOT QUANTITY TIME with your child, it should be ok. Try to learn different activities to do in their stages of learning, and teach your child. The learn alot and grow up before your eyes. Even though it can be an emotional roller coaster and gets stressful and you'll get tired , you have to try to be strong and stick in there.

Answer 2

It is the most wonderful thing and the most terrifying..I have a 8 month baby, and I would not trade one single day of it. My best advice is to be prepared...for anything...have stuff in the house that you can eat and quickly....cook a couple of meals and then freeze them, sandwich meats and that kinda thing. THe first couple of days go by really quickly once you are out of the hospital, this is when all of your friends and family come by to see the baby, so it will be easy for you to grab a shower or a meal while someone is entertaining themselves with the baby. Once that newness wears off and your guests are not coming by as often it gets harder...

THe best advice is to sleep when she sleeps...It doesnt matter if she only sleeps for 30 minutes, close your eyes, taking care of a little one is a lot of work and you are going to need your energy, Next, get her on some time of routine and quickly...and stick to it....babies need a structure, feed her at the same times everyday and put her down at the same times everyday...once she gets into the habit, she will start to go to knock off at that time withiout a lot of help from you.

For the first couple of days, dont worry about anything but the baby and you...thats it....dont worry if the dishes are piling up in the sink or if you havent done the laundry....believe me it can and will wait....(Unless you are the person who stole my cleaning fairy, and if you are I WANT HER BACK!) Dont try to do everything by yourself...you will just end up back in the hospital because you are exhausted....it happens...

THe older that she gets the easier that it gets...she will be able to entertain herself longer and hold her own bottle. ZBut before that, accept any help that anyone offers...let someone cook for you, or watch the baby while you run to the store, or whatever that they are willing to do...you are going to need the help....If grandma offers to come over and watch her during the night so that you can get a full night sleep...let her...

I am a single mother and have been since the day my baby was born....I dont think that I slept for the first 4 days that I was home, if the baby wasnt awake I was watching her making sure that she was still breathing...I know that I went 2 days without eating because I forgot to...I just forgot...

Watch out for post partum...its real and dangerous...if you start to feel overwhelmed or that you just cant handle it...tell someone....


most of all good luck and enjoy

Answer 3

you are going to feel like you are not going to make it through the night when they are first born. Its so hard when they have to be up every two hours for feeding. The older they get the easier it will be. They will depend on you for everything you just don't get a break. Be careful of post pardom depression too. I had that. Its all worth it thought. Its a wonderful feeling when you look at that little child. So lots of work but its totally worth all of it!

Answer 4

Hard, but can be done. Its Worth it to... you will have to make changes in your life but once you hold the baby you will just know, You can do it. Dont let anyone tell you you cant, you have to be responsible and dependable, after all another human being will need you 24/7 for everything. You will have to save your money and most of it will go to the baby, but you wont mind because he/she is your baby and that's all you ever think of. hopefully your at least 21 but if not that's OK to. just dont be afraid to ask for help. and be careful of postpartum depression. if you feel you have it ask for help its very important.

Answer 5

Well I'm not on my own yet but i do have to struggle going to school and raising my son and itz kinda of hard raising a son at 16 but i try my best i buy mostly every thing for my baby his dad don't do nothing for him!!! My mom helps but not often i barly have money for myself but as long az my son is happy and has milk and clothes I'm happy

Answer 6

look, my best answer is that you take all the help you can get....from your friends, family, co-workers, anyone. join mommy groups in your area, your hospital can help you with this. it's hard, i mean really hard. you have to do everything and have no one to help you sometimes, but it is the best thing you'll ever do in your life. a lot of times i ask why me but, when i look in my little girls eyes i know, that she is the reason i smile everyday. don't depend on anyone but, don't be afraid to ask for help. good luck,

Answer 7

Be organized and have systems, but at the same time, be very very flexible. Do things when they work best for you. If that means throwing in a load of laundry at 3am, by all means, do it.

Sleep when the baby sleeps, for sure.
Get a bassinette on wheels. You can take the baby with you anywhere. she can lay in there while you are showering, making something to eat, etc. Life saver.
Get help......but not too much or you will be overwhelmed dealing with people in your house. I made everyone who came to visit do one little thing. Put the clothes from the washer into the dryer. was the few dishes in the sink...etc.. that helped.

I had an ultra fast and simple morning routine. With the baby in the bassinette, I would shower, get dressed, and put on foundation, powder and mascara. Not too much, but enough that I did not feel uncomfortable when people stopped by.
I took all my sitz baths with my baby in her bassinette (on wheels). I ate as healthy as I could. granola bars, fruit, pbj.....I lived on healthy, yet easy food.
Nighttime I kept things quiet. She got up to eat a few times. But I kept it dark and quiet, but learned to LOVE Nick at Night and the late night movies when she would not go back to sleep.

As she gets older:
Use the snot sucker regularly........they fear it less that way. I cleaned my baby's nose after every bath. She now (at 11 months) will lay still when she had a cold. SHe hates it, but does not fight it.
Don't put them in the playpen unless you absolutely have to. Keep them out on the floor whenever you are in the room. Use the pack n play for when you HAVE to. Like to shower, or run to the basement. They less they are in it, the less they will mind being in it.
Start a routine as early as you can. Put her to bed at the same time every night. Eventually she will start to "shut down" at that time every day. Mine goes to bed at 8pm sharp. Put him/her to bed awake,but tired. Teach them to fall asleep on their own. This will help with your sanity later in the first year.

Look, I am not going to lie to you and tell you that it is easy.......it is NOT. but I now have a wonderful 11 month old baby girl and I am her world! Her grandma helps me out a lot, so I am lucky there. But focus on the positives of your situation:
1. You make all the decisions. no bickering or doubting
2. You can co-sleep with the baby and not feel guilty about kicking dad to the couch.
3. You only have to take care of you and your baby. If you want to eat cereal for dinner and not shave for a month, the baby will not care.

Hang in there. And I will tell you this......the older they get, the more you "get back"........my daughter is 11 months. she lights up when I come into the room. she will just crawl up on me and hug me for no reason. She loves to cuddle wiht me. I take her everywhere. She plays in the kitchen while I cook dinner. I pluck my eyeborws while she gets her bath. We are inseperable and I LOVE it. her first word was ma-ma. We such a special bond. I am sure that married moms can have this too, but I choose to look at what I have and thank the Lord every day for my little peanut-head.
It is what you make it.......make it great.......

Answer 8

BEING TIRED ALL THE TIME BEST ADVICE PLAN A HEAD MAKE UP DINNERS AND FREEZE THEM SOMETIMES YOU CANT MAKE A SANDWICH JUST BE ORGANISED AND DONT LET THINGS RUN LOW BE PREPARED FOR ANY THING AND HAVE BUB SLEEP WITH YOU

Answer 9

It is hard, but worth every minute!