Why my parents cant excepted me for what i want to be?

Question

i am a 16 year old caucasian teenager that listens to reggeton and other musics. i like the urban/ghetto style because i grew up in a ghetto neigborhood. i like wearing for example ecko clothings because i feel good about by self. When my parents are there with me to buy me clothes i dont feel as good as when i wear the things i like because they determine what i wear.They do whatever it takes to force me not to wear or represent what i like .i have to save my money to sneak in the clothes i like . When i wear the clothes they like i feel like a little child.Am having trouble getting to them because they dont like my style and they refuse to talk to me. i dont want to be the average caucasian because i feel i have no style, how can i have them to except me?

Answer 1

look dont let nobody take advantage of you


if they cant accept you for who you are then dont care

thats just wrong

feel free to wear whatever

and have a talk with them

and tell them how would you feel if you were going through the same thing

Answer 2

The parents are right those type of clothes put you in a class of people of which few people want to be around. Wear normal clothes and act like a human, your parents are the ones that took a chance and had you and then you turn around and disrespect them by wearing clothes that disrespect you. They don't talk to you because you defy their wishes. Wait till your of legal age to buy what you want and respect your parents wishes for now, you will have a different view when you find out that no one wants to hire you for a job because of how you look. To be in style and to be cool is to do as your parents ask they do have your best interest at heart so please respect them. I know how you feel and I know what it is like to wear clothes you hate every kid goes through that at some point unless the parents are rich. Just be respectful to your parents and it will take you further in life than the clothes or being in style.

Answer 3

You say you wear ecko clothing because you feel good about yourself. That seems kinda stupid to me- what does one have to do with the other?

They are probably just concerned that you are going to be a victim of bad influences... if you listen to bad music about rape and pimps and hookers and drugs, and you emulate the musicians that advocate that lifestyle, then you may end up like that.

Prove them wrong by getting good grades, stay on the right side of the law, and don't disrespect them to their face.

Chances are, they are just mortified that after they got you out of the ghetto, you seem to be idealizing the lifestyle that makes the ghetto such a bad place to be. Assure them that its just a clothing style, and you definately don't want to go back to the ghetto or whatever.

Answer 4

Have you told your parents how you feel? Sometimes that's all it takes!! :)
If you have though (which I take from your letter, you did), tell your parents that you really respect them, and can understand where they're coming from, but this is something that you think should be your choice, and that (your unique style) is something that YOU can select only!! Make sure you're empathetic (stick yourself in your parents' shoes) and respectful: whining goes nowhere.
Why not add in a bit of humor? Say
"Mom, when you dress me, I feel like I'm pretending to like and be something I'm not. Sort of like if Beyonce made you adopt her style. It's very nice, but not really for you."

Just remember to be courteous. At the worst, you've only got two years before you can legally make your own choices about that sort of thing, or move out and go to college.

Good Luck!!

Answer 5

Sounds like your parents are just being parents and wanting what is best for you. And you are being a normal 16 year old with your own style. Ask them nicely if you all can sit down and have a conversation about something that is serious to you. Then just talk to them, the key word here is talk, do not yell and do not disrespect, but do your best to explain to them why you want to wear what you want to wear, just like you did to all of us. You will find if you try to meet them in the middle and be adult like about it, you might get them to budge a bit. Good luck and I do wish you all well.

Answer 6

If they didn't like that, then maybe they shouldn't have moved into a ghetto neighborhood. They should have figured that you would have been influenced by your surroundings. I personally don't like it and agree with one of the previous statement about looking like something that you're not. But, this is you and nobody can make or change you. You should have a heart to heart with your family in a very civilized manor. Good luck to you!

Answer 7

It sounds like a lot of other teenage-parent argument cases. I know this sounds like total crap, but reflect back on your relationship with them. Do you spend a lot of time with your parents? If not, the fact they're controlling your clothing style may be the only way they can connect with you. They probably, like a lot of other parents, are scared you're growing up too fast. Calmly explain to them that you're a teen and you need to express yourself to become a self-respecting adult. (That sounds weird too, but trust me, they'll get it.) Say you're growing up and you need a bit of freedom. Meanwhile, spend more time with them. For example, randomly cook a dinner for them when you're not out with your friends or loaded with homework, or spend breakfast with them one Saturday morning when your schedule is clear.

Good luck with your parents. Hope I helped!

Answer 8

Well ive had the same problem when i was your age. but one day i sat with my mom and made her understand that i wanted to be dressed like this or listen to that kind of music. Also teenager have to pass through these thing to make or build theyre identities. Parents should be more open minded. They probably had the same issues themselves with their parents.

Answer 9

Well, what works for me is just actually taking time to talk to them. i always feel more comfortable talking to my mom, so talk to one you feel more comfortable with. its awkward at first, but it always feels better to just tell them why and ask why they wont accept it. usually there just afraid of letting you grow up. (i know mine were) you should just tell them who you are and what u want to be, make a point that u are a teenager, not a kid. if they still dont accept it, then when u go shopping for clothes, if they dont let you buy what u want then be stubborn. if they dont like it then thats good for them, cuz ur NOT wearing that in public. u need to assert ur independence and let them know you wont settle for it. they need to know that u are ur own person and that they need to let u get what u want.

Answer 10

Most teenage girls would yell, but show them what you bought. Don't worry if they freak out. Just tell them, "This clothes is me! And I can't change being me! I just want to be myself." Say it calmy so they don't freak out at you again. And also say, "The clothes you buy me is not me. You just have to realize I am growing up."